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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cut my hair off even though it will look bloody awful

51 replies

notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:16

Thanks to a succession of hairdresser with a penchant for 'framing my face' I have messy hair all different lengths. A new system at work where my picture has to be taken upon entering the building has made me realise it looks worse than I thought.

I hate it but I think the only way to address it is to cut it the same length as the shorter layer - which is short.

So should I do this and just really hope it grows fast? Or if there another way? Please let there be another way ...

OP posts:
ConkersDontScareSpiders · 09/02/2016 16:19

I would urge caution.i did this once and I ended up with an extremely short bob that has taken me 6 years to grow out (my hair grows very slowly which I found out the hard way) Is there no potential at all for some sort of re style?

ALaughAMinute · 09/02/2016 16:21

Could you try styling it or putting it up? It seems a shame to cut it.

bornwithaplasticspoon · 09/02/2016 16:25

Can you pull it off your face with a hair clip?

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:27

No - the different lengths are just ridiculous. It's almost like I've got a short hair cut and then a wig of longer hair underneath, and it's really getting me down because I have to see it every day!

I don't really want to cut it but I honestly don't know what else to do. It looks so messy.

OP posts:
665TheNeighbourOfTheBeast · 09/02/2016 16:34

I dont think it would work unless you have suddenly found a good hairdresser
otherwise you are going to end up with shorter shitter hair

you need to sidle up to people with nice hair
ask where they get it cut
then get it fixed by someone great

in that order

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:37

The problem is they are all convinced I want layers and that I want my face framing.

I don't. My face is like a potato and I have no neck. Attention needs to be drawn AWAY from my face, not to it.

That's why short hair looks awful because it draws attention to my face but longer hair all different lengths looks messy and I do like to appear groomed.

OP posts:
bornwithaplasticspoon · 09/02/2016 16:42

Does it help if you straighten it?

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:44

It doesn't unfortunately - it looks dreadful.

OP posts:
TelephoneIgnoringMachine · 09/02/2016 16:45

You need to be clear with your hairdresser about what you want, and don't want. Tell them, no layers /fringe / thinning / whatever. I never get my hair blow-dried as it looks great for the first day, then horrendously frizzy for a week after.

Perhaps you can leave it longer, but wear it up for a few months until it's long enough to cut into something that isn't just a pixie? I had a 1 inch pixie, started growing it out October 2014, it's only fully got to ponytail length just this last month. And I usually get 3/4 inch growth per month, which is pretty good. A pixie is a real pain to grow out, be warned.

Xmasbaby11 · 09/02/2016 16:46

Hmm. I've had a bad short hair cut in the past that sounds like that. I just let it grow out and used a few clips. It looked ok after about 3 weeks but then my hair does grow ridiculously fast.

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:48

I wasn't thinking pixie as that would look so terrible on me I feel nauseous just thinking about it! It would more likely be a jaw length bob.

I might try to get a photo when I get in (on train now!) so someone can point me in right direction. It looks awful tied up - anything that exposes my face needs avoiding really.

OP posts:
JassyRadlett · 09/02/2016 16:51

What I would do is find the absolute best hairdresser you can afford, one that is recommended, then go in and tell them what you hate about the current haircut, and ask for ideas about how to fix it. Don't feel obliged to go ahead if you don't trust the answer 100%

I had this gem from a hairdresser once. I looked like something from the 80s, exactly as you describe. It was awful and I wore it half up, half down for ages until I had the courage to get it sorted. The fix was much more graduated layers and quite a bit of thinning out.

Then learn the phrase 'if I walk out of here with layers, I won't be paying.' Grin

JT05 · 09/02/2016 16:54

Does your hair have any natural curl? When this happened to me, I dried it running my fingers through so that the natural curl softened the layers until it grew enough to begin getting it back to one length.

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:54

I think I may try that - anyone know a good hairdresser Merseyside way!?

But it's such a simple cut - the layers are the problem and I don't know a style that will work. I once went to a posh salon and even they flicked and tapered he ends and it should be the simplest cut ever!

OP posts:
Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:54

I'm poker straight unfortunately!

OP posts:
FellOutOfBedTwice · 09/02/2016 16:55

What about half up half down as suggested by Jassy? Tie the short bit back and then have the longer bit loose?

Wardrobespierre · 09/02/2016 16:55

I can't have layers. Makes my hair look shite and does fuck all for my potato shaped head. Do hairdressers listen? Do they fuck. It's like a personal affront apparently. I feel your pain.

CurbsideProphet · 09/02/2016 16:56

I think the issue is that a succession inexperienced/plain shit hairdressers haven't looked properly at your hair type/face shape. I would ask people you know for hairdresser recommendations and ask for a consultation, before you let them loose with the scissors. Have you looked online at different hairstyles for face shapes?

My hair currently needs a trim, so I wear it pinned up in a loose chignon. If I were you I would wear my hair pinned back neatly and find a proper hairdresser.

I do feel your pain as my hair was cut too short a few years ago. I have curly hair so it was horrendous. It took me a while to resolve. Finding a fantastic hairdresser was a big part of it.

JassyRadlett · 09/02/2016 16:57

If you have poker straight hair, have you tried some sculpting cream/wax to give it texture?

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:57

Bumping fists with you Wadrobe, my potato headed friend!

I haven't tied my hair up since school. The different lengths just mean it won't go back.

OP posts:
Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 16:58

The hair itself is lovely but the style is awful.

It won't tie back due to layers and looks awful as my big potato head is exposed!

OP posts:
CurbsideProphet · 09/02/2016 16:58

Oh sorry I have x-posted about not wearing your hair up. I second the suggestion of half up/half down!

Original poster
notsohappyyetmuchhappier · 09/02/2016 17:01

It's a terrible photo (please don't laugh!) but it hopefully 'explains' the problem!

To cut my hair off even though it will look bloody awful
OP posts:
GloGirl · 09/02/2016 17:04

Yes! I could have written your post. Every fucking hairdresser gives me the same fucking hair cut. TWO TIMES I told my last hairdresser that I want NO layers and then they cut in a straight bob, lift up a bit at the back and CHOP have cut in a short layer, what the fuck am I supposed to do?

My last hair dresser got used to me and I actually batted her hand away once when she went to chop on some layers. She wasn't so bad because at least she would start at the front and I could try and style through and I could leave the back one layer.

My hair just does not cooperate if it has layers.

GloGirl · 09/02/2016 17:05

Just seenyour pic. Get an inch lopped off the bottom and leave the other layers.

I actually did that in tears myself once but it was much better after!

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