Guests using your shower gel?

[MrsB76]

This is really just a minor niggle but I'm curious - is it really silly of me to begrudge visiting family members the use of my shower gel? I just had my MIL and SIL stay for a few days overnight and I bought them travel size toiletries (they came on a plane) and DH thinks I should be more hospitable and just let them use my shower gel (well mine and his) and toothpaste. Really?

All my stuff is just in the bathroom/downstairs loo. I'm relying on my guests not to use stuff that is clearly a bit odd, like my flannel or my razor. But tbh, even if they did I would probably never know and I would not be adversely affected by it.

I would be a bit grossed out by someone using my toothbrush but I honestly don't think I know anyone who'd think that was OK!

It's threads like this that make me glad I don't have guests staying over! I would go mad if I found out someone used my toothbrush!

I wouldn't dream of staying with someone and expecting them to provide toiletries which is probably why I wouldn't expect to provide them if we did have guests (with the obvious exception of hand wash!).

To the poster who asked whether I'd give guests nice food, wine or turn the heating up:

It depends what they class as nice food. We eat relatively plain food so if they were expecting a full Nigella meal they'd be disappointed. I'd probably tell them to bring their own wine as neither of us drink it so I'd have no idea whether it was nice wine or vinegar. The heating is always on full blast in my house so they'd probably be meaning it was too hot!

I meant to add I'd be happy to pay for the wine (within reason), I just wouldn't know what to buy!

A huge generalisation here but I find mumsnet really odd for how people treat their guests. It's almost like half of you invite near strangers into your home and begrudge them being there. If I invite people into my home they can use what they want but then I know the same hospitality is reciprocated when I stay with them.

Our guest bathroom is stocked with shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, shower gel, bubble bath, Tampax, body lotion, and wet wipes
There is also a stash of airplane toothbrushes and a random can of men's deodorant which I think my brother left here once.
I'd find it bizarre that someone would bring their own shampoo, unless they use a very specific type.
When we stay with friends, we take a mini hotel bottle of shampoo etc but would expect to use theirs
Shampoo is like loo roll. It's there to be used, surely?

Agree to PPs no one should be sharing toothbrushes or razors.

I had a BBV (Hep C).

I didn't announce it to everyone who visited. us.

I always take my own toileteries and toothpaste and assume guests will too, but I will still leave them some nice small ones in the guest room in case they don't!!

depends on who the guest is. most are happy to use whatever we have on display. and I'm happy to share a drop of shampoo etc. but also have some travel size toiletries if they prefer.
when my grabby sister visits I hide my stuff and only leave small travel sized stuff out or she would use it all up

I always take my own toiletries, but when anyone comes to stay they get a basket of miniatures in the spare room and are told to help themselves to anything else they need in the bathroom. I keep spare toothbrushes and disposable razors handy too.

I would just stock their bathroom with toiletries- if they use them fine; if not, fine!

"My house is your house", is the policy when I have visitors. I thought that was the norm. Perhaps I'm old fashioned.?

I do actually take my own shampoo and conditioner to other people's houses but I use a specific kind and have lots of slightly random allergies to that kind of thing. So I don't want to risk my scalp going crazy from someone else's shampoo. But I have no problem with anyone else borrowing mine. Or DH's. Or DD's. It's just stuff. It's there to be used.

DH and DD and I have shared a toothbrush once or twice in an emergency and it was fine. Obviously I'd prefer my own but I have shared most other bodily fluids with DH including anything found in the mouth and DD was too small to care. Not sure I'd really want to share a toothbrush with anyone else but I imagine they wouldn't want to share one with me, either.

"I'd hate it if people used my stuff and find it very rude"

That isn't rude. They are your guests. Good manners on your part as a host means that for the time your guests are staying, your home is theirs and they should be free to help themselves to daily essentials such as food and toiletries. It's lack of hospitality that is rude and ungracious.

I have used other people toothbrushes on rare occasion, It is not really that gross is it?

I wouldn't notice. I don't mark my shampoo bottles any more than I measure the loo roll circumference.

Mind you, I had a friend staying who informed me he'd used my nail scissors to trim his pubes. That I did mind, even though a quick rinse fixed it of course.

But toothbrush? Unless it is someone I regularly swap saliva with it is super gross.

Really not getting the preciousness over toothpaste. Unless you're using the stuff in a bowl, the paste just squeezes out of the tube onto the brush. The tube opening doesn't even make contact with the brush, surely. Speaking of brushes, I tend to have a couple of spares available, which get chucked in the dishwasher on a long hot (60°) wash afterwards, so they should be clean and bug-free, hopefully.

"any more than I measure the loo roll circumference."

Now we're into Denton's territory. "Bring me the calipers, dear!"

" I had a friend staying who informed me he'd used my nail scissors to trim his pubes."

How - odd.

Goodness it must be an uncomfortable experience being a guest in some of your houses! I want my guests to feel at home, and they are entirely welcome to help themselves to anything we have - food, drink, toiletries etc.

We don't have a dedicated guest bathroom, so guests normally shower in the en suite (would never inflict sharing a bathroom with my 4 boys on anyone I like enough to have as a houseguest!) and if anything I'd put away the cheap shower gel and get something nicer in. I have expensive shampoo, DH prefers cheap stuff - guests can use whichever they prefer. I would have no problem with them using toothpaste, but draw the line at sharing my toothbrush!

I'd expect them to bring their own but if they didn't I'd get the cheaper stuff out for them

Wow, this is unbelievably tight and inhospitable in my view... When you have steak do give them spam?... Oh, and don't forget to put the value loo roll out, hiding your quilted extra specials.

But surely only the bit you've squeezed out actually touches your toothbrush? ( Memo to self: watch other family members' toothpaste squeezing technique).
I would take toiletries only if staying with people I didn't know very well (unlikely) -except toothbrush and roll on deodorant. I quite like trying out others people's shampoo etc .Unless I was going for a week or more, in which case I'd take my own shampoo-for my hair's sake. I assume people would put away anything 'special'/expensive they didn't want me to use .
I would expect guests to use what was in the bathroom. And always have spare new toothbrushes in the bathroom cabinet.And provide clean guest towels that match the room they are sleeping in .

I'm glad he informed me though.