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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teacher quit and walked out

368 replies

Moonlitarsehole · 03/02/2016 16:23

Nc'd to not out myself.

Ds informs me on the way home that his teacher walked out on his last class this afternoon.

Apparently she'd asked on numerous occasions for quiet, and threatened to not help with their coursework. Then said "fuck you lot, I quit", collected her bag and walked out.

I was like Shock ds was vague and said he didn't want me to call the school, as they'd all had to make witness statements.

Anyway, dh is home today and asked ds if he'd been talking too (after I tell him what had happened) and really told ds off for being so disrespectful.

Ds is upstairs writing a letter of apology, not sure what the school's take is on it. Not even sure if she'll get it.

So aibu to think the teacher just lost their shit, which happens to us all?

OP posts:
MadisonAvenue · 03/02/2016 19:10

I hope the teacher's okay.

We have a friend who teaches in a secondary school, he's very experienced and head of his science department. He's a big guy but that doesn't stop pupils having a go, or their parents either when they come in to complain about why their angelic little Kai got a detention.

Our son wants to go into secondary school teaching. I think he's crazy, I really do.

DakotaFanny · 03/02/2016 19:11

She will be continually answering to why their coursework is not up to scratch? What she's going to do about it? Why she isn't getting them all As? When they are less bothered than her and even say "sweet" when she threatens to withdraw support (which she will never do btw), then why should she bother? Poor woman, but a massive sign of the times. It's not really even the kids faults, it's the system, where teachers are blamed for failure instead of kids. This is only going to get worse and worse as we do more and more for them because otherwise we'll have to have another million conversations and tick box actions re:underachievement. Pfftt.

Howaboutthisone · 03/02/2016 19:12

Mrsjorah you explained it perfectly above. It's madness that the results are seen as those of the teacher and not the class. This has driven me to the brink on occasion.

Dreamonastar · 03/02/2016 19:13

There is nothing sarcastic about what I said but I didn't care for the implication that males are forcing kids into submission with their masculinity whilst weak little females aren't.

Sillybillybonker · 03/02/2016 19:19

There is a national shortage of teachers. It is such a shitty job that hardly anyone wants to do it any more. I had a go at teaching but could see how dreadful it would be so I jacked in my PGCE halfway through the first term. Jacking it in was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I've got a fab job now.

Headofthehive55 · 03/02/2016 19:20

These "children" are in some cases 6 months off starting work. Hands up whose workplaces tolerate this behaviour?

unlucky83 · 03/02/2016 19:21

A disruptive boy in one of DD's classes (then aged 12-13) was so continually obnoxious he made one female teacher walk out of the class in obvious tears. (likely to be tears of frustration)
He thought it was hilarious...he got an immediate one day suspension.
But the way the timetable worked the next time that teacher had to face that class he was back and spent the whole lesson making snivelling noises and pretending to cry...
Thankfully he had lost his 'status' as class clown - no-one thought it was funny, the vast majority of the other DCs were disgusted with him and ignored him.
Good on the teacher for facing that class again ...but you would think the school would have moved him to another class rather than make her face him again ...
He was moved a few weeks later - according to the grapevine his parents asked for him to be moved because in that class there were lots of bad influences...he continued making trouble in his new class (different teacher).
Similar happened on the school bus ... he caused lots of trouble so his parents got him moved to another bus - because of bad influences - then he had to be moved again for the same reason...
You do wonder when it will dawn on them that he is the problem...
(In fact he used to occasionally bully my DD on one bus and actively encourage others to be mean to her ...if anyone is a bad influence it is him...)

PurpleDaisies · 03/02/2016 19:23

I agree with dreamonastar that physical presence is far more important than physical size. You must all have had a tiny teacher who could reduce a whole room of rioting teenagers to stony silence with one "Ahem..."

LazyDaysAndTuesdays · 03/02/2016 19:25

There is nothing sarcastic about what I said but I didn't care for the implication that males are forcing kids into submission with their masculinity whilst weak little females aren't.

Where have a said it was. Stop reading into things that aren't there to fit your own narrative. Grow up.

If you must know my DM was a headteacher in a very tough school.

As for 'forcing kids into submission' I didn't say anywhere any one was. Don't make stuff up!

BoneyBackJefferson · 03/02/2016 19:26

As a six foot big build male, I've had 4 foot nothing pupils tell me to "fuck off" that they would "have me sorted" and a couple of chairs thrown at me.

I've also been threatened by females (and males but to make the point etc.) for putting children in detentions as per the school rules.

The size of the teacher means nothing

LazyDaysAndTuesdays · 03/02/2016 19:29

The size of the teacher means nothing

I agree

Dreamonastar · 03/02/2016 19:29

So if you didn't mean men were better at discipline then what did you mean?

I'm not being obtuse; it's a genuine question!

BoneyBackJefferson · 03/02/2016 19:29

As another thought, if you have too many negative influences in a classroom it can be really difficult to sort out.

LazyDaysAndTuesdays · 03/02/2016 19:34

So if you didn't mean men were better at discipline then what did you mean?

Where did I say men were better at dealing with discipline? All I said is he was good at dealing with such situations and calming troubled children down. He is. Nothing to do with gender or physical size. It was his personality. My DM was exactly the same.

Hulababy · 03/02/2016 19:36

I left secondary school teaching after 10 years, about 8 years ago now. I don't regret that decision at all. It had gotten to a horrendous point by that stage. Discipline in that school was dreadful and smt were useless at dealing with it. I had a chair thrown at me when I was heavily pregnant - it hit my stomach. The child then smashed two windows in his way out of school. He got a day in internal exclusion - for the Windows more than anything else. I had no apology or anything. I ended up going on may leave early to get out of it.

The day I left teaching was a relief. I went to work in prison ed after that and it was so much more pleasant dealing with those teenagers and men than it had been in that school.

I do now work in a school again - in infants. Which I love. But I will never return to secondary education ever again!

echt · 03/02/2016 19:36

And all this time I thought Boneyback was a woman.

Poor teacher. I've come so close, usually expressed as :"I would get sacked for what I would like to say."

MrsGuyOfGisbo · 03/02/2016 19:36

I agree that size and gender is irrelevant.
What you have to have is the nerves of steel to wait for silence.
(I often supervise trainee teachers, and see them falter at this first hurdle) the essential thing is to wait for absolute silence.
When you see respected teachers in schools they ALWAYS wait for silence, and then pause before speaking.

Dreamonastar · 03/02/2016 19:37

Well, you didn't Lazy so why you leaped down my throat I don't know!

Atenco · 03/02/2016 19:37

I went to a top grammar school in the 1960s and we managed to give one of our teachers a nervous breakdown.

It's not this generation, it was ever thus.
But it certainly put me off a career as a secondary school teacher.

MrsDeVere · 03/02/2016 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Funinthesun15 · 03/02/2016 19:38

When you see respected teachers in schools they ALWAYS wait for silence, and then pause before speaking.

I agree. My DM always had 'a look' too Grin

LazyDaysAndTuesdays · 03/02/2016 19:42

Well, you didn't Lazy so why you leaped down my throat I don't know!

You accused my DF of using his size and testosterone keeping the kids on check' when I never said such a thing. Anyway let's forget it.Grin

HRHsherlockssextoy · 03/02/2016 19:42

I remember teaching supply at a primary school. The children were awful. I was told if they want to go just let them leave.

I remember looking at the clock at 9.30 am, and wondering whether to walk as my £70 a day wasn't worth it.

I stayed but wished I left at 9.20 instead

MrsDeVere · 03/02/2016 19:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MazzleDazzle · 03/02/2016 19:43

I've taught in secondary schools for 10 years. Thankfully, nowadays I rarely have any discipline issues, but when I first started...(shudder)

By far the scariest situation isn't when a pupil tells you to fuck off, or kicks a table or a fight breaks out...it's when 30 pupils continue to talk amongst themselves and completely ignore you, or when one pupil coughs, then another, and another, until they've all taken a turn, or when one pupil asks to borrow a pencil, then another, then another. Little acts of defiance that slowly drive you mad. On one of my placements I actually curled up behind the door and cried after one lesson.

It is so reassuring to see everyone on this thread showing kindness and understanding towards the teacher. Well done OP and also to your husband.