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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be sick of people slating Faith schools

999 replies

Jenga123 · 30/01/2016 15:09

Don't get me wrong I understand why some people may be against them but the negativity I've come across recently is, quite frankly ridiculous. I've been told by friends of friends, family etc that they pay for my dd's to attend their catholic primary and secondary schools and that tax payers that are paying towards these schools should not have to do so if their children can't attend these schools. Well let me just say the average amount of income tax each individual pays, that actually goes towards the upkeep of schools is minuscule, so they aren't in fact paying for them. Myself and the other parents of my dd's schools pay a considerable sum each year to the upkeep of the school and the school contributes 10% towards the costs of running their school and repairs etc.

I also come across animosity at the fact my children are getting a good education and people putting that down to them simply being baptised. But my point is if they feel that their own children are missing out by going to a less desirable school then I'm sure they could have them baptised therefor giving them a higher chance of securing a place at a faith school, and whilst I'm not advocating people pretending to be of the faith, I'm simply saying there are options.

As for my dd's schools like I said they are Catholic and are obviously places were parents of the same faith opt to send their children as they want them to be educated within that faith, and I can't see any problem with this to be honest so why am I hearing nothing but negativity from people?

OP posts:
dawnviews · 01/02/2016 17:06

Nonsense that it causes conflict. I have a large family who all went to catholic schools. We've all formed our own opinions on what we've been taught. Some of us believe, some of us don't. Not one of us is in the slightest way screwed up because of our schools teachings. You tend to disregard lots of things you don't believe in. Some people think far too deeply into it all.
Bert I don't know about fair but when I went to secondary school I don't suppose it was fair that I didn't have a choice of catholic schools. There was only one in the whole town, . That's life I suppose, full of unfairness. There's far worse things to worry about.

JassyRadlett · 01/02/2016 17:20

Nonsense that it causes conflict. I have a large family who all went to catholic schools. We've all formed our own opinions on what we've been taught. Some of us believe, some of us don't. Not one of us is in the slightest way screwed up because of our schools teachings.

Oh good, because what is true for one family in one set of circumstances obviously holds true for everyone. No need for concern - dawn's family turned out OK!

Some people think far too deeply into it all.

Irritating fuckers, thinking seriously about things. Obviously didn't go to schools where critical thought was discouraged.

GnomeWare · 01/02/2016 17:23

Some people think far too deeply into it all.

I don't think you can take the relatively small sample of your immediate family and conclude that no-one feels conflicted, or those that do are just 'overthinking'. I went to religious primaries and secondaries and remember feeling very weirded out by the idea of God watching me, especially at primary as the religious morning assemblies were delivered by a fairly scary head teacher. The messages of 'god in authority' and 'school in authority' were quite deliberately sent out as a joint message.

As an adult I no longer feel any guilt about being an atheist but it was certainly a process I had to go through.

Itsmine · 01/02/2016 17:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dawnviews · 01/02/2016 17:28

I don't mean my immediate family, I'm talking about lots of cousins as well. Also friends that I went to school with. They don't seem too traumatised either. I'd love to hear of an example of someone badly affected. I bet there won't be many. School bullying is more of a cause for concern imo.

GnomeWare · 01/02/2016 17:29

Yes we've had the its local and handy, but so are lots of schools.

You have spectacularly missed the point here - in many areas there are NOT a lot of local, handy schools with available places. Places can be very, very limited, which is why it is all the more important to have fair, non-discriminatory admissions policies.

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 17:35

So regardless of discrimination and state funded schooling, some people are happy with faith schools.
So I'm the following instances it's fine:

To have to have a religious education that against your family values
To be prevented from going to your nearest schools because of discriminatory policies
To be prevented from going to the school with the best outcomes because of discrimination
To be prevented from attending the school with the best outcomes because your parents don't want religion taught as fact

All these things are fine?! Really

And teaching human sacrifice as fact is hunky dory too.

BertrandRussell · 01/02/2016 17:36

People really are incredibly good at "missing the point" when the system works to their advantage, aren't they? I can only assume that they are giggling behind their hands as they pretend not to see the blatant unfairness of a system that means people of faith have 33% more schools to choose from.

Christian privilege is a horrible thing. And extraordinarily unchristian.

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 17:36

I do wonder if blind faith is more blinding than we think.

Devora · 01/02/2016 17:39

So many people on these threads seem to think that everyone has a choice of a number of good local schools, both faith and secular, and that it's only bitter dog-in-the-manger types who complain that they can't get into ALL the schools. Honestly, they say, just choose one of the others; no biggie!

Don't they read the posts from people (like me) for whom faith schools have meant NO choice of decent local schools for their children?

Do they really think that their nice-to-have choice of a school that matches their faith is higher priority than other families' access to a local school?

Rhetorical questions, obviously. I know the answer. The attitudes of some posters on here is not a great advert for the benefits of that much-mooted 'moral framework' that we are told is one of the draws of a faith school.

MrsDiamond4 · 01/02/2016 17:43

oh bertrand do you think religious families should boycott faith schools in support of this injustice?

We are Christian, but not Martyrs.

BertrandRussell · 01/02/2016 17:48

Well, a little less smug "that's how it is, deal with it" might be seemly.

allegretto · 01/02/2016 17:49

I don't really see a faith school as being very different to a Montessori school, or a school that encourages sport - you choose a school which you think is a good match for your child. It is however wrong to limit attendance to only those who go to church! I think all schools should be open to everyone (so no grammar schools either).

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 17:51

Montessori isn't a belief system.

If you don't understand the difference you have no experience of Montessori, I don't know if a state Montessori either.

GnomeWare · 01/02/2016 17:51

Well, a little less smug "that's how it is, deal with it" might be seemly

lol - yes, together with a little less of the pious overtones of 'well I'm sure a bit of prayer wouldn't go amiss with your kids anyway'.

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 17:53

No one is saying boycott!

The Op moaned about the terror of people complaining about discrimination

MrsDiamond4 · 01/02/2016 17:54

arh so it's contrition that you're after? got it!

Itsmine · 01/02/2016 17:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

allegretto · 01/02/2016 17:54

Montessori isn't a belief system.

Yes, I know that thank you. Neither is sport although DH might disagree

Itsmine · 01/02/2016 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Micah · 01/02/2016 17:57

Most of the secondary schools here select. Either on faith, music, sport, or ability.

How is one different to the other. We're not a musical family, but i could have made dc take music lessons from an early age, if we had the money. Some of dc's peers have done just that, solely with the intention of getting a place at our local school. Not much difference between being prepared to spend an hour a week at church, or at kumon, or an hour practicing piano?

None have straightforward selection policies at all, in fact.

allegretto · 01/02/2016 17:58

Exactly Micah!

Ambroxide · 01/02/2016 18:09

This is very interesting:

www.sciencemag.org/news/2015/11/nonreligious-children-are-more-generous

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 18:14

Discrimination is discrimination however it comes.

A child with faith, forced, fake or otherwise have a greater choice of state schools...

How is this fair?

JugglingFromHereToThere · 01/02/2016 18:15

Not everyone with DC at a faith school thinks the system is without fault.

Some of us just think it is what it is ATM and just want to make the best choices for our DC

If you and your DC have benefited from the system it can be hard not to buy into it a bit, or be tempted to justify it.

It's arguably a more nuanced and less understood view to admit you were something of an opportunist - though it's my view that that's a natural state for human beings.