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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think if you've escaped a war zone, have shelter and food a wristband is no hardship

242 replies

Lj17lj · 25/01/2016 08:32

I might get slammed but I really don't see the issue. I've went on very expensive holidays and festivals and have to wear a wrist band for weeks on end, its fine. When I go to the steam room in local gym I have to wear a band.

I really can't see the issue. It's not the same as forcing a tattoo on someone.

OP posts:
Lweji · 25/01/2016 18:45

Why not? It's a traditional way of welcoming people.
Maybe in a small village. But then You wouldn't need to identify people with wristbands.

And it's patronising to approach a refugee and offer them tea because you felt sorry for them. Particularly if you wouldn't do it to any stranger.

Lweji · 25/01/2016 18:49

I think its very insulting to compare it to Nazis,

The OP did that in her eagerness to show that it was ok.

Other people have simply pointed out that as the stars, it starts with small things.

tormentil · 25/01/2016 18:54

And it's patronising to approach a refugee and offer them tea because you felt sorry for them. Particularly if you wouldn't do it to any stranger.

You invite them into your home and do the 'tea ritual'. It's a universal gesture of welcome. How on earth is that patronising?

Lweji · 25/01/2016 18:58

It's patronising if you do it only because they have a wristband and you only invited them because they are refugees.

tormentil · 25/01/2016 19:01

It's patronising if you do it only because they have a wristband and you only invited them because they are refugees. I have no words.

PausingFlatly · 25/01/2016 19:05

tormentil, perhaps you could enlighten me as to what this "distinction" is, that needs to be "marked"? To strangers on a street?

What is it's purpose?

Alambil · 25/01/2016 19:08

it's actually skirting very close to the wind in relation to article 3 of the European Convention of Human Rights... but let's not worry about human rights. .. they're only immigrants, aren't they? Angry

HooseRice · 25/01/2016 19:09

I don't understand why they don't just have a list of people they are expecting and tick the name off as they appear.

I personally wish these people all the very best and hope they are not too disheartened by the selfish and xenophobic attitudes of the brainless fuckwits among us.

ouryve · 25/01/2016 19:12

It's a very big issue when you're being assaulted or ridiculed because of it.

tormentil · 25/01/2016 19:22

Pausing Flatly Sorry, I can't answer your question because it doesn't make sense to me. I made a point about 'otherness' and how I think that the people who are bothered about creating otherness, are equally guilty of creating that otherness. Then Lweji took me on a diversion to tell me that offering people hospitality is patronising. And your question muddles both, which means it makes no sense.

PausingFlatly · 25/01/2016 19:42

"Sorry, I can't answer your question". Well gosh I'm surprised.

bobbi4444 · 25/01/2016 19:47

I live near Lynx house and drive past several times a week. The idiots who shouted abuse at these people did not do so because of the wristbands. It's because they know they are asylum seekers who live at the hostel. I must admit, I would be nervous about walking past this hostel now. There are always at least 20 young men hanging around outside smoking. I don't like feeling this way and am all for helping refugees, but I can't help but feel intimidated.

tormentil · 25/01/2016 19:54

PausingFlatly I think you just played a game with me by placing me in a damned if I do damned if I don't position. You didn't want an answer (clue: 'perhaps you could enlighten me'), and followed this by a nitpicking and muddled question. To attempt an answer would lead to more nitpicking questions. To refuse to answer would give you permission to gloat. Which, of course, you have done. Well done.

Lweji · 25/01/2016 20:05

If we were decent people we would be saying 'oh, that person has a wrist band, they need support' and ask them in for tea, cake and a chat. And now that chance has gone.

I'm quoting this again.

This is what I questioned you on. On the need to have a wristband so that you'd welcome them, and by inviting them for tea.

Why ask someone in because they have a wristband? Because they attract your pity?
Why not the next person you find at your bus stop?

If you do want to help refugees, why not join a relevant charity or work as a volunteer?
No identifying wristbands are necessary.

Lweji · 25/01/2016 20:07

And the idea that refugees are just dying to be invited for tea and a chat with a random local. That it will just sort it and they'll be so grateful.

tormentil · 25/01/2016 20:40

On the need to have a wristband so that you'd welcome them, and by inviting them for tea You have paraphrased. I made no mention of 'need'. I was describing a possible scenario of a different kind - the opposite of being taunted and teased. The inference being that being taunted and teased was not the only option. Sadness too that we have passed a time when that was possible.

Lweji · 25/01/2016 20:53

I'm sorry if I misinterpreted.

But to me it read as we've missed the chance of welcoming a random refugee by inviting them to tea and a chat because they won't be wearing wristbands, so we can't spot them in the street.

2010Aussie · 25/01/2016 21:22

Judging by the amount of personal abuse being deliberately directed at the OP for comments which might might be a bit misguided but it seems not INTENTIONALLY offensive, I too am ashamed to be British.

Very surprising that bedheadrestless is bothered about the OP using incorrect grammar, whereas presumably the expletive-laden posts of others are perfectly acceptable as they are supportive to him/her?

usual · 25/01/2016 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2010Aussie · 25/01/2016 22:10

No, not new. Just get a bit fed up with all the personal abuse whenever anything contentious comes up and the constant swearing. It gets a bit boring and rather detracts from the argument. But I was rather amused when the OP was picked up for bad grammar.

You clearly know the OP's intentions better than I do. I did say 'seems not'.

ItWillWash · 25/01/2016 22:38

I'm not sure that the OP is goady or naive, but all the FREE mentioned throughout the thread got my goat, so to speak.

Of course they get free homes. What else should happen? Shall we agree to offer them refuge in our country and what? Let them sleep on the streets? Ask them to pay? With what exactly?

These are families, risking their lives to flee from war. They've lost everything. Many have seen families members killed. Have some compassion. They get nothing more than our own country men and women who are unable to provide for themselves for whatever reason.

Grilledaubergines · 25/01/2016 22:43

I've already fallen for the GF trap once this evening.

Ooh, how about a GF wristband?

IPityThePontipines · 26/01/2016 00:42

Such opinions as expressed by the OP have been allowed to fester on threads elsewhere and are trying to spread around the site.

It's like the benefit-bashing threads all over again.

HelenaDove · 26/01/2016 01:01

I think this wristband idea is awful Its stigmatizing.

Monty27 · 26/01/2016 01:04

I went on all inclusive holidays a couple of times and had to wear wrist bands. I felt like crap having to do it. and also like some of prisoner

It's a ridiculous idea, even worse than food vouchers. It's hardly a party is it? FFS

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