To wonder why I never learn my lesson about the local hv baby clinic....

[SexDrugsAndSausageRoll]

What is it about them (our local, have lived elsewhere near good ones)?

Ours are just awful, yet I still took my baby after exactly the same experience with my other kids...

Big room, first I just walk in (one other mum in there) to be told I must wait to be called in... So sit on chair outside, she follows me out, my arse glances the plastic and she says "come in". Ok.... Done the dance

Go to the first mat to change, "oh no we queue the babies starting here" . No other babies are present, ok....so I move along and use another.

Weigh baby, watch wrong centile be plotted...ok, saves that chat about weight gain...

Finally see hv, say I'd like to ask about dd's squint "oh she doesn't have one". She does, showed photos to make it clearer. "Well even if I referred her they'd say just wait and see" so I asked can you refer her? "No, only GPs can". Ok...wasted a protracted chat there!

Then clinic has begun to fill up, row of mums has formed and are listening now ( fair enough not much else to do). Booming voice looking at red book, oh her sister has (insert multiple referrals and condition). Is she looked after properly??? (Very loud). Er... No we keep her under the stairs...bye now. "Can I have your mobile number to call you?" Prefer not thanks...

Just... Surreal

Visions, one of mine failed the test because there were about 8 sets of scales stored in the room we had the test in. He went around solemnly measuring himself on each of them and then announced they were all weighing him differently. The HV advised me he might have global developmental delay

Just come back from a weigh-in with 7mo DS and I don't know why I bother. He's way off the chart for weight, so the HV told me to stop feeding him at night and just give him water. Plus to fill him up on pasta so he doesn't wake in the night. DS isn't crawling yet so stuffing him with carbs isn't going to help the weight

If they bothered to measure his length, they would see he's over the 99.6 percentile for this too. The poor boy is roughly in proportion. May be I should starve him and chop his legs off to make him 'normal' though!?

Not bothering to return and will instead weigh him at home. Obviously if his weight gain continues once he's mobile I'll see the GP, but he's weaning and not burning it off at the mo.

Hi
I have started a thread in child health but wonder if anyone on here can help?
Can you ask for the health visitor records?
I forgot my ds red book at his 2 1/2 yr check (bad mother!) and now had a phone call that makes me think they have mixed his records up but as it wasn't recorded With me I don't know for sure but what the hv said on the phone didn't add up

Was due to see one for my sons 2 year 'development check' this week, and for her to 'advise' me on diet, development, dental health and how to start the process of potty training (her words

Ds is closer to 3, has a medically supervised diet that she aint getting involved with and has been potty trained for months now.

However on monday morning I got a phonecall which went something along the lines of

"I'm really sorry mum but xxxxxxxxx health visitor is very poorly today and wont be able to come and visit you. Which is a real shame as she reeeally wanted to meet you. Why dont you pop along to the baby clinic on wednesday for a nice chat with one of the other health visitors"

Quite frankly I would rather poke my own eyeballs out than rock up to baby clinic

dylsmimi you are entitled to see any records relating to your ds - you can put in a formal request and may have to pay a little for a copy. However, in this situation you are probably best to just phone up and explain the problem.

DS couldn't sit unaided till his first birthday, my fault I held him to much apparently. DS couldn't walk until past 2 my fault again I pandered to his every need, why would he walk? DS couldnt speak a word at 3 she told me I needed help there was nothing wrong I was neurotic and should see the GPs for anti depressants.

On my knees weeks later I took DS to GP something I thought unrelated it was a locum she examined him and referred him urgently to the children's hospital. Within a month he was diagnosed with a serious genetic condition one of the most common that exists the consultant was amazed as he was a text book case the most obvious case she had seen in 20 years. He ticked every flaming box.

I made an appointment to discuss this with her and according to her she had never heard of it. I've since seen notes that she basically accused me of putting my sons symptoms on for sympathy. For his last set of injections I demanded they be done at GP appointment as I wanted no further contact with her.

Health visitor here and a long time lurker on mumsnet . I am sorry to hear that some people have had bad experiences of baby clinic / health visitors . But I would like to reassure expectant or new mums that these stories are not always the case . In the town I work in , our daily clinics are all at children's centres and are welcoming and purposeful. I love clinics , they are relaxed and keep me on my toes !
Parents don't have to have a health visitor , and contrary to popular belief social services are not informed if our services are refused . Unless of course there are safeguarding issues. Yes it's recordevud on the babies/ child's records , but that's it.
Please don't be put off !

Had several bad experiences with different HV clinics and very very poor advice - especially concerning DD1's tongue tie - which they categorically said did not exist.

I later found out that every HV I had spoken to was actually a nursery nurse and not a HV. Even when I asked to speak to the senior person present they still weren't actually a HV - but this is not advertised and they make out that they are HVs.

I think this is a big part of the problem.

chick

It would be interesting to know how many of your service users agree with that.

Mine were truely awful. Oh the damage they did. Horrendous.

Why is such a shoddy and ignorant service allowed to continue? Would it be tolerated in other parts of the NHS? Or is it because women and babies don't really matter.......

Alcon I don't think it's exactly because "women and babies don't really matter.......".

I do think it's because women's opinions are devalued and not considered accurate or trustworthy. Mothers of babies/ young children in particular are devalued with the whole 'pregnancy brain', forgetfulness, over emotional reactions and perceived issues/ stereotypes around women returning to work ...

So the complaints and shoddy service is put down to 'those stupid / unreliable/ hormonal mothers, they don't know what's good for them'.

Well said.

Got referred to HV by GP when DD was 6months for some support whilst I waited for PND counselling referral to come through. This was in the October. Counsellor contacted in December, counselling started in the Jan. HV called me in March.

I was at work when she called, so couldn't talk. When i said that her response was 'oh, you're back at work, things must be ok then'. Totally useless.

Never saw them again.

Plus, I'm not a fan of being called 'Mum', just look at the notes, I have a name!

Thank you blaeberry I will go to clinic this week (taking time off work) and see where we go from there

I've had rubbish experiences of HV too, the one we're seeing just now has told me three times now to stop bf my five-week-old dc for totally fucking stupid reasons. I'm only going because her weight dropped a lot when she was new(er!) born and I want to keep an eye on it. She weighed her on broken scales last week, announced that she'd lost weight (wrong) and told me to ff from now on. I knew she had put on, she was bursting out of her tiny clothes so I asked for her to be reweighed on different scales, which she did reluctantly, with much patronising 'well, if it'll make you feel better' - and I was right. The HV told me I could 'continue breastfeeding, if you want'. Thanks for your permission there, cheers. So fine, not really her fault about the scales, but she was so quick to push ff and had no intention of believing me when I said 'I don't think that's right'.

The HV I saw with dc1 asked me how my moods were, did I feel depressed at all? I said, truthfully, that I was struggling a bit with the dark nights and shorter days, and was having trouble sleeping due to anxiety. She said 'oh I'm the opposite, I always sleep better with the dark nights'. End of conversation.

Plus every time I've asked for actual advice they've just said 'monitor the situation for a few days then trust your instincts'. So I trust my instincts and then get 'hmmm, I think you're going to have to ff from now on'. I have no issue ff, I ff dc1, but if I'm going to stop bf now I'd like it to be for an actual reason and not because she's not putting on x amount of weight by x amount of days, allowing a box somewhere to be ticked.

God, sorry for the epic post.

My health visitor has been nothing but caring and professional, just to put the other view point

Actually, the HV team we had with DD was also lovely and gave some really helpful advice if you wanted to ask for it. They weren't pushy at all.

I think the service is so hit and miss, you might get a good one or might not, plus you never know who you'll see in our clinic. No-one introduces themselves with a name. You don't know them and they don't know you.

I went to the HV clinic with my 7th baby as noticed that on occasion her face would droop on one side when relaxed. Was told not to worry, her face moves symmetrically when she smiles. Saw GP last week who rushed her to emergency paediatrics at local hospital. Baby is now under neurology and awaiting a MRI to check for brain lesion.

Asked HV to refer to SALT for feeding issues, couldn't be done. But I have self referred and baby being seen next week.

Needs - Your tarring every health visitor with same brush. Just like every profession there's good and not so good . I think the fact many parents come back to the clinics in the area I work is a pretty good sign. Our general figures for meeting all the routine checks are also high .
Lots of the reports I read on here alwAys shock me about advice given or things omitted and I do feel sad that all families don't get the service . I love my job and genuinely work hard to improve the health and development of babies / children and to support parents .
Having also worked in hospitals where patients / carers are supported to complain if the service they receive is poor / not what they expected perhaps more people should complain about their health visiting service .

I am in the process of putting in a complaint about what happened. Most of this week has been spent trying to get my head around things.

I used to have an excellent HV. She was really good and lovely.

My new one is not so good.

I hate my hv. At dds two year check she had moved up a percentile since she was last weighed (at her one year check) so she asked me what dd ate. I told her it was all healthy home cooked food and lots of healthy snacks. She looked at me like she didn't believe me and then spent 20 mins telling me to substitute chips for carrot sticks

chick

My experance is just that my experance, I come into contact with a lot of health visitors and do agree that yes you get good and bad in every job but my experance is I have only had personal experance of one very good one. Sadly when you put a service financially on the bones of its arse reduce its staff but up its tasks and case loads the inadequacte or ineffective or pointless or effective but so thinly stretched it's beyond a joke tends to increase. The horrendous ones are much the same as other jobs where you do get nasty gits on power trips but the sad fact is they can do a lot more damage to people than say a nasty postman.

A great many of my service users go to baby clinics because even tho it is an optional service they believe if they do not go it will be considered to be a safeguarding issue.

You may do lots of checks and tick all the right boxes but the reality for a lot of families is that baby clinics are not staffed correctly not private and a total waste of time.

Fwiw I spent several decade in the type of job where almost every single service user would love to tar and feather you so I iniw what it's like to feel defensive about your profession but it's not personal.