Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I have been invited to a 2hr "inspiration evening"

42 replies

ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:18

to discuss the values held by DD's swimming club. So far as I can tell the values are, "don't be a twat and try to do better tomorrow than you did today". I have nothing of any use to add that.

AIBU to have other plans that night?

OP posts:
toffeeboffin · 18/01/2016 15:26

YANBU.

Why aren't these people doing normal stuff, like at home watching the Good Wife and mumsnetting?

PurpleWithRed · 18/01/2016 15:26

YABVU. Oh, hang on a minute, are you going to the pub instead? can I come too?

MrsTerryPratchett · 18/01/2016 15:30

Emperor's new clothes. There will be others, too embarrassed to say anything. I suggest a loud, "Inspiration Evening? WTAF? Anyone fancy a pint?"

Wineandrosesagain · 18/01/2016 15:34

Eh? A two hour meeting to discuss the values of a swimming club? WTAF? I suspect this is a ruse and you will find yourself at a pyramid selling event, or being indoctrinated into a cult! Please go to the meeting and report back.

CakeNinja · 18/01/2016 15:36

Just send dd?
What the hell?

GiddyOnZackHunt · 18/01/2016 15:38

Are they trying to recruit volunteers?

Zucker · 18/01/2016 15:41

I suspect a selling evening of some sort too. Leave your purse at home Wink

TheSpottedZebra · 18/01/2016 15:43

Ooh will there be a PowerPoint? With inspirational quotes set against a backdrop of sunsets and/or trees?

Maybe you could be super - enthusiastic and take your own quotes along. But make them shit or slightly
nonsensical.

Original poster
ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:44

It is apparently to begin a discussion of our values so that they will be more than just pretty words Hmm

With your collective approval I shall be staying home :-)

OP posts:
CuppaSarah · 18/01/2016 15:44

Either recruiting volunteers or putting prices up. Under the guise of 'protecting their values'

Wineandrosesagain · 18/01/2016 15:45

No, I do not approve of you staying home - please go!

Original poster
ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:46

My only real value as regards swimming is the DD learn the importance of not drowning.

But I get the feeling they want us to all be "engaged" and other equally buzz-wordy shite.

(And absolutely to buy stuff. Mountains of it. With DCs name on. For the price of a small mortgage.)

OP posts:
Original poster
ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:47

wineandroses really? I know at least one other parent who will, without a doubt, go. Will a proxy, albeit earnest, report do you?

OP posts:
Wolpertinger · 18/01/2016 15:47

I forbid you to stay at home. I now really really really need to know how the values of a swimming club can fill a two hour meeting.

You need to go in the manner of an undercover reporter. We can all suggest values for you - see how bonkers they will accept in the spirit of inclusivity Smile

RedToothBrush · 18/01/2016 15:49

Ask for the minutes of the meeting as you can't attend.

Then burn them.

Original poster
ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:49

Okay...

Send me your most ludicrous values statements and I shall try to work them in - assuming that my "don't be a twat" is not suitably lala...

OP posts:
Wineandrosesagain · 18/01/2016 15:49

A proxy and earnest report will have to do then...sniff.

Wineandrosesagain · 18/01/2016 15:50

Cross posted - will give some thought to value statements (excited).

Original poster
ohdearlord · 18/01/2016 15:52

You've got two weeks - obviously we all needed a good amount of notice to prioritise this Confused

OP posts:
AgathaF · 18/01/2016 16:03

Guaranteed not to be inspiring!

lorelei9 · 18/01/2016 16:08

Who comes up with this shite?!

Don't go but get minutes and share best with MN Grin

cleaty · 18/01/2016 16:08

"Water is defined as an essential nutrient because it is required in amounts that exceed the body's ability to produce it. All biochemical reactions occur in water. It fills the spaces in and between cells and helps form structures of large molecules such as protein and glycogen. Water is also required for digestion, absorption, transportation, dissolving nutrients, elimination of waste products and thermoregulation (Kleiner 1999)."

Quote this, then follow it up with the following values.

  • To embrace the opportunity to gain additional essential nutrients, whilst pursuing happiness
  • To value our children's cells, and also crucially the spaces in between them
  • To see the timely and appropriate elimination of waste products, as an essential function.

I can carry on with this nonsensical shit forever. Can I go?

givemushypeasachance · 18/01/2016 16:10

Where I work the favoured buzzwords include anything bespoke, being on the front foot and being reactive. I'm sure some reactive front-footing (or front-crawling?) could be worked into the values!

GruntledOne · 18/01/2016 16:10

YANBU. You can tell them Gruntled says you shouldn't go. If you do go, try playing buzzphrase bingo - all right minded parents can draw up a list of aspirational phrases (e.g. thinking outside the box, blue sky thinking, thinking across the piece, reaching out, pulling things up the flagpole and seeing who salutes etc) and tick them off every time they're uttered, the winner is the one with the most ticks.

DrDreReturns · 18/01/2016 16:10

One value statement could be "Don't drown"