To make nanny and DC travel economy?

[BooAvenue]

We are planning a trip to NY in the autumn and plan to take nanny, DD who will be 6 and DS who will be 16 months.

DH and I will be flying business, partially because I am a crap flyer despite flying frequently and partly because we have quite a lot of air miles that we want to make the most of.

The plan is to bring nanny on the 5 day trip so she can help out with the travelling and babysit for us on three of the nights. I've discussed it with her and she's very eager to come, and the plan is she will have 2 days and 2 evenings completely free to do as she pleases, plus TOIL of 6 days. We will of course pay for all hotels/flights/meals out and she's welcome to join in with us on her days off if she wishes. She also gets her own room whilst we have a 2 bed family room.

The difference between economy and club is about 2.5k per ticket, which whilst we are not poor is still a fair chunk of money.

So AIBU to fly business whilst she flies economy? And will DS need his own seat or will he need to go on one of our laps?

[DickDewy]

Sounds like a jolly good plan to me. I would have loved to not sit with my children when they were little.

Now they are teens we sit nowhere near them on planes.

Anyway, I think it sounds like a fair deal for the nanny, although I would take the youngest off her hands a bit during the flight.

[Purplerain067]

[gamerchick]

At least get a seat for the youngest. I wouldn't like me own kid on my knee for that length of time never mind someone elses.

[ghnocci]

I would have everybody sit in economy, save 5K and have 10 days in NY rather than 5.

misses point of thread

[ExasperatedAlmostAlways]

Absolutely no way would I not sit with my children whilst flying. If there's turbulence and they get upset (which happened on the last flight on the way home in october) then I would want to be there to comfort them and they would need me there to feel comforted. I think yabu. But the rest of the trip re the nannie etc sounds very reasonable and generous.

[PenelopeChipShop]

I don't think you're unreasonable BUT I wouldn't do it. I haven't flown first since having DS as I always want to be with him and he with me. I don't actually have nanny though so I guess that's immaterial...

Dh's business partner and his wife have done exactly this though and it was fine. They have also taken their kids (both under 3 at the time) in first class with them and FWIW I find that much more unreasonable!!

[LeaLeander]

Can you leave her home with the baby and take your daughter with you?

I don't have a problem with making them fly economy (though it's a stretch to say you need biz class due to anxiety - it's all on the same aircraft) but no way should you make her hold a toddler on her lap the entire transAtlantic flight. That would be absurd. Get three seats in economy for them or sit back there with her yourself.

I know you think "Oh but I will get the toddler for a good part of the flight" but once you are aloft with a couple glasses of wine etc. I would be anything that poor nanny has the kid the majority of the time. At least make sure he's in his own seat.

Or just tell the daughter plans changed, mom and dad are going to Moscow not America, see you soon! and get two biz class seats to NYC.

[Supermanspants]

So sad you are not building holiday memories with your kids. My two have such happy memories of all the places we have been.

I don't think it is unheard of for affluent families to travel staff/young children separately....... some parents have been known to book kids in as unaccompanied and pay extra for airline staff to chaperone.

If nanny is ok with it then I can't see the issue. Some nannies might not be but horses for courses I guess

[UtterFuckery]

YANBU at all.

[BolshierAryaStark]

The more you post the more detached as a parent you sound.

[Gwenhwyfar]

It's not unreasonable, but it's a bit uncomfortable. I've travelled with bosses who went business while their staff go economy. It's always a bit awkward when the boss says 'see you later then'.

[GloGirl]

If you put your nanny in economy for gods sake buy your DS a seat.

I don't think I could bring myself to travel in a different level of luxury to my children or travel 'with' someone but better than them.

That being said I don't think I could put a 16mo in business class. But maybe the 6 year old might help the nanny with your son if he's a handful.

Wow, I'd probably travel with the nanny and the baby in ordinary class and have my DH up front with my daughter.

Bloody dilemma though!

[PenelopeChipShop]

I'd book the extra seat in economy if I were you and count on spending Ag least half the time back there with the toddler on me.

[Bearbehind]

I honestly don't think that holidays are much fun for kids unless they are geared towards children

OMFG- I've heard it all now.

If you have children, why would you choose a holiday that wasn't geared towards them?

It is incredibly selfish to have kids but to carry in doing your own thing without them afterwards because it suits you better.

The very fact you posted that is evidence you are perpetuating your bad experiences- it's very very sad.

[PippaPug]

I'm a Nanny and I'm more then happy to travel in whatever class but not when Parents are travelling first class!

I have had it happen once in where I was travelling and the mum and child travelling first class and she asked me to explain to 3 year old why I wasn't sitting with them

Funnily enough the last of any respect I had I completely lost there and then!

[NerrSnerr]

You get more as a family if you and your husband do have your adult holiday and leave your kids at home?

I guess this is where people are different. You choose to have children so you tailor your holidays around them. Why bother having kids if you don't adapt your life to accommodate them?

[AndNowItsSeven]

Not holidaying with your dc is selfish and weird unless it's a rarity/ wedding etc

[Believeitornot]

Maybe your parents argued for different reasons! I wouldn't write off family holidays as a result.

Yours will remember that nanny was there and probably wonder why you were doing the whole "Disney" parenting thing.

If the journey is stressful then either deal with the flight anxiety (what will you do when the kids are too old for a nanny) or don't fly.

[londonrach]

(Ignores the whole flying nanny and dc in economy whilst op and dh is business). Op. Whats it like in business. Please please take a photo of the flight pack as ive heard you get toothpaste and all sorts.

[Believeitornot]

Also of course family holidays should be geared towards children

Adult time is different.

[JoMackl]

Ophelia - because it's BUSINESS class!! The clue is in the name. People pay extra to have room and peace to work on the flight or to be rested enough to have a meeting when they arrive at their destination. Is that really so hard to comprehend? It's the same with designated quiet carriages on trains. Someone having a chat on a mobile phone is asked to move to another carriage but screaming kids are often allowed to stay. (I use a lot of trains.)

If you want to travel in first class with children and can afford it, knock yourself out (though I am guessing some passengers who've shelled out even more than the business class folk would not appreciate the inevitable noise, but I don't think they have the moral high ground there.)

My DD is 1. I have the choice not to fly with her until she is old enough to sit patiently / amuse herself/ appreciate the experience. I'm guessing around 7 or 8 years old. I understand some people have to travel with young DCs for family reasons, but IMO they don't have the right to occupy designated quiet adult spaces that are for BUSINESS. (If I had to travel with DD for some unforeseen, urgent reason, we'd go economy and sit at the back. When I travel for work I go business class - where I expect the peace and quiet and adult, business environment I've paid for!)

[PuppyMouse]

On paper I don't think this is unreasonable for the nanny. But can't say I feel same from your kids' perspective. DD would be beside herself asking where I was wanting a cuddle.