To wince at people who have homebirths?

[TheCatsMeow]

I never used to, I used to say that everyone should have the birth they want and mean it. But my birth went wrong and I ended up with a baby who would have died had it not been for NICU. If we had been at home, he wouldn't have survived and I may not have.

Every time I hear someone say they want a homebirth my head screams "YOU'RE BEING IRRESPONSIBLE". I get visions of myself and my son lying dead. It frightens me and every time I see a woman who is pregnant I think "I hope they both survive". I don't say any of this unless someone asks and then I just say that I ended up with complications so was greatful to not be at home.

But I feel like people are risking themselves and their babies and it makes me uncomfortable. I think IABU but don't know how to deal with my feelings on this. Please don't be harsh.

I had my eldest in 1990, there were far better staffing levels than there are now so I was attended practically the whole time.

He still has brain damage from oxygen starvation during his birth. As aurymne points out, a lot of procedures in labour are to fix problems caused by other procedures in labour, it certainly was in my case.

I chose home birth. I live three doors down from the hospital. I had two senior midwives with me for the whole 40mins (I am quick) . It was lovely.

If I had lived a long way from the hospital I may have chosen differently. Or maybe not as the chances are I would have had her in the car. Please don't assume all other women are making stupid decisions - you can't possibly know the facts.

I am very sorry that you had a terrible birth experience and I hope your baby is well.

she probably knew her own body better than you

The idea that you can 'know your body' and therefore know that you're going to have a straight forward birth, is, quite frankly, a bit silly.

There is a fuck load of luck involved in how straight forward a birth is, and 'knowing your body' doesn't really help if things go wrong.

Home births and specialist birthing centres have good outcomes because the risk profile of the births is lower to start with.

There is also higher staffing ratio (2 midwives to one woman for a home birth) and a lot of issues in hospitals would be vastly reduced if every labouring woman had one midwife let alone two.

One of the main reasons people cite home birthda as being good is the level of attention you get from your midwives, which you don't get in hospital.

If I were pg, my order of preference would be to give birth in a private hospital (much is £), second in an NHS hospital but pay for a private midwife to be my advocate (they can't get involved in treatment).

"Home births and specialist birthing centres have good outcomes because the risk profile of the births is lower to start with"

No - the evidence is that the outcomes are similar to similar low risk mothers who choose a CLU as their setting for birth.

In other words, the research compares like with like.

And when it does it finds that low risk mothers have at least double, but up to 5x the rate of caesarean sections in CLU's as they do in free-standing birth centres and at home.

My opinion is if it's your first birth then you should be at a hospital because you don't know how things are going to happen but if this is your 2nd birth onwards and had no problems then I can see why they do it.

Personally it wouldn't but me but my kjudgement may be affected by that my baby boy and I nearly died was very horrific. He's now 5 in April btw so he's fine has asthma but that's it.

But I can also see it as people who don't have anyone to look after children they already have and want their partner/DH there having a home birth.

YANBU in having your opinion about it though as we are entitled to that.

Every woman should have two midwives in attendance when the birth is imminent - one for the mother, one for the baby. As far as I know this is the rule for hospital as well as home. A home birth means 1:1 care, the second midwife is only called when the baby is close to being born.

"If I were pg, my order of preference would be to give birth in a private hospital (much is £), "

The evidence from Australia is that low risk mothers who give birth in private obstetric settings have much higher rates of forceps deliveries in particular, as well as emergency c/s when compared to similar low risk women giving birth in public hospitals. I suspect you'd find the same thing here.

Personally I'd never opt for a private maternity unit unless it was attached to a big NHS hospital. If you're going to pick a model of care that puts you at an increased risk of a complicated birth, the least you'd want is quick access to a HDU full of experienced practioners, and neonatal care. You're not going to get that in a private hospital.

"My opinion is if it's your first birth then you should be at a hospital because you don't know how things are going to happen"

But the EVIDENCE suggests that free-standing birth centres (ie - one run by midwives and not attached to a hospital) are a better choice for first time mums, despite their lack of doctors and neonatal care.

You are MUCH more likely to have an uncomplicated birth in one of these birth centres. Your baby is just as likely to be healthy after birth as the baby of a mother who uses a big consultant led unit in a hospital.

I feel the same as you regarding home births for a first child just because of the lack of knowledge of yourself! In my mum's case when I was born, she was told after an emergency section that she could only deliver a child at around 30 weeks naturally. Had I been a home birth I would have died -
and not to mention my mum!

YABU I was advised to have dc3 at home by hospital/doctors. I didn't but they said I really should for dc4. The only thing that puts me off is my home is quite small.

mini
I'm only aware of one private maternity unit in the entire country that isn't attached to an NHS hospital - the Portland

Despite the myths that surround it, it has all of things you've listed, and while half of the babies delivered there are by elective c-section, their emergency c-section rate is 17%, which is lower than the published rate for nearest birth centre to me
www.theportlandhospital.com/mobile/maternity/maternity-services/

Could the lower EMCS rate be linked to the higher ELCS rate?

mrsjskelton often DRs are not correct.

The consultant and team were in the labour room telling me I wouldn't give birth naturally, meanwhile unbeknown to everyone my DS head was coming out. On leaving the room my DH started looking under the covers as he said later oh you had beads of sweat and looked a bit disgruntled I didn't really believe the Drs. I hadn't had an epidural or anything. I wondered what he was doing! He was greeted with DS face!

Very good post auryanne

A lot of what hospital provides is knowledgable staff, drugs, iv fluids. They come to your home. Hospitals are not special, they are just buildings.

I've been told I can't give birth naturally, as in I could possibly with a forceps but can't with nothing as my hips are tilted and not big enough so would probably always have cesareans. I didn't know that though until I'd had DS.

I don't mind that, I didn't mind the cesarean its the baby getting distressed that upset me

four
It could be a range of things. I imagine women who have £15k to spend on their birth also have money to spend on birth preparation, are more likely to be a healthy weight and have fewer underlying health conditions.

I was told I wouldn't be able to too, as I'm too small and the wrong shape. It's a horrid shock isn't it?

I had an absolutely horrible hospital birth with my first, got taken in early with high blood pressure, had to be induced, had stitches (which were done wrong - whole other story!) and then ended up spending a week in afterwards as I hadn't passed all the placenta and DD1 was jaundiced as I'd had a ventouse delivery and she had a massive blood blister on her head.

Despite all that, my GP at my post-natal check up said that I could have a home birth if I wanted to next time.

DD2 I had at home, as planned, after 3 hours labour, in my spare room.When she was born she swallowed some crap on the way out and was struggling a bit, but the midwives were calm and managed to suck it out. Once I knew everything was ok, I went and had a bath, midwives cleaned up and I spent the first night in my own bed with my baby and actually managed to get some sleep.

I'd take the second birth over the first, all day long.

Op I hope your debrief goes well and you get some help learning to deal with your experience.

Personally I had 1 planned hospital birth 2 planned home births and 1 unplanned hospital birth. We transferred with Ds when it took longer than we thought it should. Had I agreed to do as the consultant wanted when we transfer (speed up the labour) we now know Ds would have gone into distress and I would have needed a emergency c section. So no hospital is not always "the best place" it depends upon the expertise of the hcp who are with you. Doesn't matter if your at home or at hospital.

Research show as has been mentioned birthing centres and home births for
LOw risks women are the safest. I am sorry this was not your experience. However i know I was not irresponsible to have home births. I would have been had I blindly agreed to speed up the labour because the doctor wanted it over with. Ds would have been unable to get out of the birth canal and would have got very distressed. Doesn't mean I say no one should have their labour sped up. We make the decisions we feel to be right. I looking back feel I did wrong in transferring to hospital with this birth. However I also know that with what we knew we did the right thing.

As home births are safer you could equally say you wince at those awful mothers who choose to risk their baby to a hospital which my father (an NHS consultant) always said were just about some of the riskiest places to be - full of germs.

Given that over half of all babies at the Portland are delivered by c/s (and they don't publish their figures for rates of assisted delivery) and we know nothing at about their caseload (though we can probably assume that it's nothing like as complex as the sort of caseloads they get in most large teaching hospitals) I'm not sure you can draw any conclusions from that...

At the moment the default option for most women is a CLU. Those choosing homebirth/MLU have to make an active choice for it, and in many cases there is no MLU choice because they have been closed down.

I wince when I think of the lack of information given to those women routinely booked into the CLU. Are they told for example, how often their hospital has closed to new admissions? Or told exactly what the staffing ratio is? Are they told about the intervention rates? I strongly suspect not.

The Portland have a lots of overseas customers who are not eligible for NHS care. If you had to go private for ante natal care then you might as well enjoy the luxury of the Portland.

The Portland caters for women who want a c section without an obvious reason. They provide a non judgemental service. All that the family has to do is get out their chequebook and they can have whatever birth option they want.

I think that private maternity care must be lovely if you can afford it.

Great post, aurynne.
A lot of what you say is familiar from what my MWs told me when I was having my DC.

Didn't read the full post then, iamlovedbyG ? 😄