New baby sex and gender

[Iliketoparrty]

My SIL is pregnant and texted folk yesterday about finding out the sex of the baby.

Text said something like - SIL and DH are expecting a male child in ...2016.

So DH texted back congratulations on having a baby boy ... Etc. MIL also phoned them to congratulate them as it will be the first grandchild for MIL.

SIL responded we don't know if baby is a boy, need to wait and see. Baby sex isnt important, it doesnt mean anything. Hopefully its a girl. This was also reiterated to MIL and other family.

MIL has been on the phone asking DH (he is a doctor) what does that mean, is the baby ok? DH tried to explain the sex/gender difference but MIL is still worried.

In the last hour we have had 4 family members phone us about this as they don't want to call SIL in case she gets upset.

Aibu to think there was no need to tell folk about the sex of the baby if she doesn't think its important?

I have brains. Levels and stuff.

(Scene setting)

I have read every post in thread.

( no drip feed)

I am confused.

The baby is male yes?

I have to say that this sort of thing just wouldn't have happened in the 1950's. People were just glad it ( male, female or transgender) was ok. And that was after birth.

I am hoping for the sake of SIL that the somewhat traumatic ( though also wonderful) process of giving birth will knock some of this tosh out of her.

Sounds like she's trying to be a smart arse and highly annoying.

Tell you sister to stop spending so much time on Tumblr. She is having a boy until that boy is of age to tell her otherwise (if needs be). She's going to be one of those people who raises their child totally genderless, isn't she - look forward to years of hard work here, op.

The thing is , if she is planning on bringing the child up gender neutral.....she wouldn't say Hopefully its a girl.

It's sounds like gender disappointed in the extreme.

Did she want a girl? Does she want a girl so bad she hope her child is transgender?

Does she realise what the child will possibly go through if he is transgender? Just to satisfy her needs to have a daughter?

Yy enjolrass.
If it were my sister, i'd send a load of papers on gender dysphoria, increased risk of mental health problems, suicide, incontinence from surgery, hormone effects etc and ask why she is hoping for this. But then my sister wouldnt say something so bloody stupid, so i guess i'm not in a position to suggest what to say!

Is she trying to be very, very politically correct?

There are a small number of people who identify as a different gender from their biological sex (which is more public and accepted now). So does she think we now have to assume everyone could be and refer to them that way?

Bloody hell. Poor MIL. What a fuckwit of a SIL you have. Frightening an old lady over nothing.

She clearly has a serious issue with the gender of the poor baby. Make sure you only get gender neutral baby presents!!

Same old shit again. Woman disappointed because she's having a boy and not a girl. I'm so bored of this crap, it's so predictable. What is so bad about having a boy?!

Wtaf?!

The baby is a boy. People are congratulating on her having a boy. Stop being bloody awkward.
I have one girl and one boy.
Not a girl who might be a boy or a boy who might be a girl.

If in the future they want to be trans, I will deal with it then. For now I have a son and a daughter. My son is a boy and my daughter is a girl. Done dusted.

Is she this much of a pain over everything?

Of course if any baby turns out to be trans I would hope their parents are supportive

But the statistics regarding suicide, self harm, life expectancy for trans people are horrific, and it's not an easy path for anyone. Why on earth would anyone actively hope for that for their child?!?

I get being gender neutral, I do. But then why find out the sex? Then everyone goes for neutral things for gifts etc. I think they WANT to reject the baby boy blue things they will inevitably receive. But not announcing the sex would prevent many of these so WHY?!

Honestly, this has to be a joke. You are being joshed OP. The fact that it was a text to everyone sounds weird too.

Ok I have studied gender to PhD level and still think this is bonkers. It does sound like a typo to me. Are you sure she meant male child?

I'd just buy them a load of pale blue baby clothes and leave them to it. God help this child when it's born.
(She so wanted a daughter btw).

I agree with the people who think she means the scan might be wrong (ie gender disappointment) rather than ultra PC.

Of course, there is always the possibility of intersex.

I don't understand your OP. Have they had a scan?? Sorry - it's not clear....

Eh?!?

The only way the text makes any sense to me would be if your SIL surname was Male, I.e. 'we're having a Male baby!'
Actually just reading that back to myself that makes no real sense either! Plus I'm guessing that's not your SIL surname

Ah what a clusterfuck - sorry OP!

I am so homesick for the 20th century.

Are they joking?

Trying to work out what male child could be an autocorrect fail for.

WTAF?

Another very confused poster here.

Was it a typo? (not sure what other word could replace male though..) Or Did the original text not come from SiL and she didn't want the sex announced?

She is being utterly ridiculous.

I have absolutely no idea what the OP is talking about

I'm confused!!!!

Why won't she come back and explain to all us confused posters??!!

I went a bit bonkers when I was pregnant too.