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Original poster

To get a lemon for SIL to suck?

124 replies

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 24/12/2015 00:27

SIL, who has never concealed her contempt for DW, is attending the Christmas bash at our house under sufferance. MIL, BIL, and the charming nieces have jointly instructed her (her words) that she is to turn up cheerful, hold her tongue, and not drag everyone away early. Oh joy. My conscience tells me I should be a good host, the Devil is tempting me to tease her. Help me resist my black and twisted humour. /rant.

OP posts:
Original poster
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 24/12/2015 11:55

Surprise peas were a dried petit pois made by Bachelor's up to the mid 90s. www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/archive/index.php/t-1196256.html

OP posts:
citybushisland · 24/12/2015 14:54

Funny, either some posters have reached the end of their tethers with Christmas and have had sense of humour failures or they are the very relatives some of us love to hate :)

liquidrevolution · 24/12/2015 15:56

I had surprise peas today. Except they were peas from lunch my toddler DD had added to my cup of tea. The only cup of tea I have actually managed to finish today and wished I hadnt Hmm

Love some of these put downs. Its great to be able to have something like this inside your head. Its just a problem when I accidentally say them aloud...

BoneyBackJefferson · 24/12/2015 16:15

citybushisland

Or a third option is that they are the ones that are constantly faced with similar barbs and put up with them for the sake of family.

FruVikingessOla · 24/12/2015 16:23

Oh, thanks, Disgrace. I hadn't heard of them before Blush

I love the idea of 'surprise peas' - a bit like you'd find some peas underneath something edible on your plate and you'd be happily surprised. But I'm easily pleased!

LumelaMme · 24/12/2015 16:52

Or a third option is that they are the ones that are constantly faced with similar barbs and put up with them for the sake of family.
Which is what the OP is doing: he's not saying them.

FWIW, I'm with him on this. I've buttoned my lip many, many times when in range of my uber-bitch SIL. Usually DH and I have a good moan after seeing her. I suppose this counts as being nasty about her behind her back, but it's that or ruin family events or go gently mad.

liquid, your Surprise Peas sound a real treat Xmas Grin

Wagglebees · 24/12/2015 17:09

Just realised the first two pages of bosom hoiking were all before 9am. Now I know I'm suffering from chronic fatigue but, Christ on a bike where does one get the energy from to post like that at 8.30am on Christmas Eve?

Some posters need to rein it in a bit or they'll peak too early. Pace yourselves.

Sansoora · 24/12/2015 17:11

8.30am on Christmas Eve?

Assuming a person is in the Uk.

Wagglebees · 24/12/2015 17:13

I think it's fairly safe to assume the majority of the posters were in the uk, yes.

Sansoora · 24/12/2015 17:17

I think it's fairly safe to assume the majority of the posters were in the uk, yes.

Ah now its the majority. Wink

Wagglebees · 24/12/2015 17:18

Where did I say it was all? Confused

Wagglebees · 24/12/2015 17:18

And why does it matter?

Here love, Biscuit go and argue to yourself in the corner.

BoneyBackJefferson · 24/12/2015 17:19

LumelaMme

I'm not saying that the OP will say them, I'm just offering an opinion as to why some posters may have reacted like they did/have.

Sansoora · 24/12/2015 17:27

A very Merry Christmas to your and yours Wagglebees. Smile

Vedamakesthebesttoast · 24/12/2015 18:24

disgrace where's that unicorn of yours.. I have a job for it. It appears that something nasty has crawled up sansoora's bum and died (possibly the elf of Christmas joy and good humour) but regardless, we need a long pointy thing for extraction.

Just back up slowly Hun, we'll be gentle

StrangeLookingParasite · 24/12/2015 21:03

Perfect Percys

Arf, yep. They must get many headaches, from their halos being too tight.

RamblingRedRose · 25/12/2015 03:30

The key is not to let her get to you. The barbs make you sound bitter. When snobby SIL arrives just say that you heard she was there under sufferance and offer her an Aldi mince pie. Who cares what she thinks of you and your wife? Have a good Christmas, eh!

RamblingRedRose · 25/12/2015 03:34

Ps. I'm abroad and just finished working on Christmas morning. Off to make lunch!

aoife24 · 25/12/2015 04:04

Blimey, the joyless, passive aggressive are out in force

Original poster
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 26/12/2015 21:36

Aaaaand...exhale. Luckily we acquired some babies to distract her, so she couldn't do the spitting cobra thing.

OP posts:
FruVikingessOla · 27/12/2015 09:00

What babies?! Where from?!

Original poster
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/12/2015 10:32

DD invited a couple of friends, and they each brought a laughsome little creature. Usual thing, arsehole babyfathers, no money or family support, cold houses. Frankly, we needed the extra mouths, the girls needed to catch an hours sleep, win all round. God sends the guest, as my dad used to say.

OP posts:
FruVikingessOla · 27/12/2015 16:41

Oh, that's lovely of your DD to invite her friends - and so great that you and MrsDisgrace were more than happy to have them join you on Christmas Day.

LumelaMme · 27/12/2015 18:58

That's fab, Disgrace.

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