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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to tell my brother his husband stole our chocolates

113 replies

Sunflower1985 · 19/12/2015 22:18

Petty - extremely petty, but it's bugging the heck out of me.
We had my brother and his husband over for Christmas meal today. They drove a fair way to us, so we didn't mind supplying the food. They brought presents and a cheese board.
A pleasant enough day, but the ending soured it. We didn't get round to the cheese, having had very decent portions of the beef roast dinner, homemade bread and baked Camembert, chocolates and tiramisu we provided.
On the way out they took all the cheese they bought from the fridge. I made my peace.
Then my BIL went into our garage and took a handful of the the chocolates we had bought back from our holiday. They weren't out. They were tucked away in the garage ffs. He can't have been hungry - we fed them all day. If he was he could have had the cheese they took with them.
WIBU to tell my brother this is twattish behaviour and to get his husband to apologise?

OP posts:
Behooven · 20/12/2015 00:00

Can't even imagine taking back food (or drink) I'd brought, how utterly stingy

AgentZigzag · 20/12/2015 00:03

OP's DH doesn't need to be superman he just needs a pair of these.

I prefer to think of the bloke in a see-through rain mac, a must have if you're looking to provoke a bit of Christmas Hoiking Grin

To want to tell my brother his husband stole our chocolates
PaulAnkaTheDog · 20/12/2015 00:09

Tellin' y'all, Clark Kent is among us.

Greatblue0wl · 20/12/2015 00:13

Just tell your brother then. What do you think he will say?

SilverBirchWithout · 20/12/2015 00:16

Who keeps chocolates from a holiday in the garage. We need to know more. Why were they there? Had they already been opened? How long ago was the holiday? Is the OP not worried about mice getting in?

kittypaws · 20/12/2015 00:16

that would annoy me, just the fact of taking something i didnt say you could have. I would mention it but only if you are 100% sure that your husband saw it in his pocket.

ZacharyQuack · 20/12/2015 00:19

Never mention it to either of them, but from now on every present to DB's husband can be a box of chocs with a handful missing.

MindfulBear · 20/12/2015 00:25

wow. How rude, & yes tacky, to take back the cheese they brought! & incredibly rude to root about in someone else's garage and nick some chocolates.

You need to have a word with your DH and tell him to say something next time.

This time I suggest you take the high ground. Dont mention the cheese but you should mention to your brother that you are a bit concerned some chocolates went missing that day and do hope none of the kids stole them as [insert vile vomit inducing story about dog pee/vomit/rats/laxatives etc].

I would also keep your garage locked next time or insist he is chaperoned throughout the house. what else is he pilfering on his trips to your home?! No wonder your DM banned him, although that cant be easy for family relations.

MotherofFlagons · 20/12/2015 00:27

I'm sorry but nicking the cheese would be a total NC for me.

KoalaDownUnder · 20/12/2015 00:34

Whole thing is weird.

Taking back the cheese board was utterly bizarre, for starters.

ThisOldFool · 20/12/2015 00:35

I'd include a couple of bits of Exlax in my next box of chocolates AND make sure he helped himself generously. What a thieving arsehole! Well a sore arsehole if he scoffed the Exlax!

gaggiagirl · 20/12/2015 00:42

What chocolates are we talking about here?
If he stole Cadburys shite from you he was doing you a favour.

ovenchips · 20/12/2015 00:58

Well the chocolate bit I can't even understand tbh but taking back the cheeseboard. Shock

I knew a couple who at the end of a party/ get together would go into the host's garage (or wherever all the booze was kept) and retrieve any unused alcohol they had brought to the party, including partly empty bottles.

Despite also drinking alcohol the host had served and eating a meal the host had provided. It really made me curl up with embarassment to watch it.

Tight as gnat's chuff in all other ways too, obviously. But this particular manifestation always seemed so utterly ungracious.

HairySubject · 20/12/2015 01:07

Also interested what chocolate was nicked, if it was stuff from America I wouldn't be bothered, that herseys stuff just doesn't cut it with me.

AgentZigzag · 20/12/2015 01:08

I'd have to stash theirs away so everyone could enjoy watching their fruitless hunt ovenchips Grin

Although they sound as though they'd have enough cheek to ask where it was (not that it'd do them much good, like)

PaulAnkaTheDog · 20/12/2015 01:09

Lol-ing at someone suggesting nc for taking back cheese!

MitzyLeFrouf · 20/12/2015 01:12

I'd go NC for a good Cashel Blue.

AgentZigzag · 20/12/2015 01:14

Yeah, but it'd be fair do's if there was stilton involved PaulAnka.

I'd probably consider nc if it was stilton on its own if the truth be known, but with a cheese board you're looking at, what? Five maybe six types.

Armed conflicts have started over less.

stepmad · 20/12/2015 01:17

Wrap the remaining ones and give them to him as a present

Fratelli · 20/12/2015 07:49

Ohh I love stepmad's idea! How incredibly tacky and rude of them both!

Pepperpot99 · 20/12/2015 08:01

I'm not sure why people think this thread is a wind up. I have a similar situation with some of my relatives who are more than happy to visit often (their place is tiny and can't accommodate us with kids) and never , ever bring anything. They will happily eat us out of house and home, never offer to help with any clearing of the table etc. They have spent several Christmas days with us when I have ended up spending a fortune on a massive turkey , champagne etc and they have not contributed anything.

CakeNinja · 20/12/2015 08:09

Op come back!

catfordbetty · 20/12/2015 08:15

They drove a fair way to us, so we didn't mind supplying the food

This is the oddest part of the story.

ricketytickety · 20/12/2015 08:30

He sounds a bit dodgy if he has form for rooting around in people's cupboards and helping himself to things. Is he a bit of a tea leaf? Maybe enjoys stealing something of low value as a sort of one-upmanship. I'd be tempted to make a jokey comment just so he knows you know and then watch him like a hawk next time he's about. I wonder why your dm has banned him from hers - did he take something then?

DinosaursRoar · 20/12/2015 08:38

Catford - it's really not ! Someone's gone out of their way to get to yours rather than meet half way, then you supply all the food, if they live round the corner but always come to you, it's less cheeky to asks for them to bring something...

Anyway, OP - clearly your BIL needs banning from your house too. I would go all concerned with your DB, does his husband have a problem with taking things from houses? He seems to be unable to stop himself rooting round and taking things, you aren't upset, you are all worried, if your brother needs support dealing with his DH's mental health problems, you are here for him... [head tilt, sad smile, lightly rest hand on arm]