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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for living in a shit hole?

130 replies

Cuppaand2biscuits · 17/12/2015 18:57

Posting here for traffic. My house has got into such a mess, literally every surface or corner is cluttered with crap. Not actual rubbish but toys, clothes, junk.
Can someone please help me and tell me where to start? I need a big kick up the bum.

OP posts:
groovergirl · 17/12/2015 23:50

Consider donating clothes, books, DVDs, toys and good household items to school and church fetes. The organisers are always looking for good things to sell.

I totally dig fetes. They're a lovely day out, they raise money for worthwhile projects, and frankly quite a lot of my wardrobe has come from them. I've bought beautiful clothes for a fraction of the new price.

Go and support your local fete!

MrsJayy · 18/12/2015 00:16

You need to pay for bin collection in ireland thats shocking do you not have a council tax ?

MartinRohdesBellybuttonFluff · 18/12/2015 00:22

No MrsJayy our property tax is somewhat similar to your council tax. Payment for bin collections are separate to this.

MrsJayy · 18/12/2015 00:25

Well thats rubbish is it expensive

MrsJayy · 18/12/2015 00:26

Urgh no pun intended Grin

Maryz · 18/12/2015 00:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadeMan · 18/12/2015 00:50

"Can someone please help me and tell me where to start?"

Don't do anything until you've made yourself a big pot of tea.

In my experience the exact ratio of cups of tea needed for the duration of the job is approximately 1 cup, per square metre of clearance to be done.

kittypaws · 18/12/2015 02:10

buy some boxes from wilkos or ikea and organise everything, just spend one day doing that then next day do your clothes.

ItsMeImHere · 18/12/2015 08:10

Pop over to the Housekeeping section and have a look at the KONDO threads. They can get a bit woo but there is masses of sense, great advice and support by the bucketload.

Even if you just steal some of the key ideas totally not what I do you can begin to make a massive difference to your home, your attitude towards stuff (and hopefully your hoarding DH) and in general your happiness and satisfaction in your home.

Good luck whatever you decide, I sympathise entirely as I also have a hoarder he hasn't missed the 7 bingbags of clothes I Kondoed a few months ago Grin

It's harx, but we'll all get there eventually!

Blacktealeaves · 18/12/2015 08:16

Great advice on here. I also think charity shop a good plan.

unlucky83 · 18/12/2015 08:39

Kondo - haven't read the threads but it introduced me to the vertical folding method for clothes in drawers. I have done all the clothes now (mine and DCs) and bedding, towels, even finally the kitchen tea towel drawer...(and bought drawer dividers for underwear drawers etc).
At first it takes quite a bit longer whilst you learn how to fold things and get used to the way to fold to size for different sized drawers etc but it soon becomes habit.
I think it is fantastic - would never go back to flat folding. Drawers never get into a jumbled mess, you can instantly see what is in there (and so can DCs).
For years anyway I have had a recycled clothes bag on the go at all times - anything ruined/outgrown etc goes straight in the bag (I go past a clothes bank once a week -so easy to get rid when fullish) but also if I go to put something away in a drawer and there is no room I get rid of something in there (and I am ruthless about it)- vertical folding means I can see what hasn't been worn/ you have too many of etc really easily ...

Clarella · 18/12/2015 10:55

Choose loud music. Chemical bros for example. Bags, boxes.

Put papers etc into a bag for sorting later. Everything else in piles as described above.

Wine waiting for end. Good luck.

Clarella · 18/12/2015 10:56

Could someone describe vertical folding please?!

WhataRacquet · 18/12/2015 11:07
Vertical folding
MoreTeaPenguin · 18/12/2015 13:02

I go into town twice a week and aim to take a bag of stuff to the charity shop every time. Our house is slowly clearing of clutter as stuff is now leaving it faster than it is arriving. The gradual approach works for me and hopefully as it's not much bother I should be able to maintain it.

SoWhite · 18/12/2015 13:06

DH saw me reading this thread this morning, and has just texted to ask if I am the OP.

Don't know if I'm Grin or Sad.

fiverabbits · 18/12/2015 13:36

I find storage is the answer BUT you have to sort it out to make sure you only keep things you really need. I have an exercise book with a list of all the cupboards/wardrobes/chest of drawers and make a note of the date when I checked the contents last, try to do this at least once a year. Just got to get my two grown up children who live here and are hoarders so just in their rooms, the loft, 2 sheds and a garage to follow my example.

UterusUterusGhali · 18/12/2015 19:05

I'm considering putting everything in the DSs room in a giant box so they have to sort through it.

It's really getting me down.

BarbaraofSeville · 19/12/2015 08:19

Don't buy loads of boxes until you have sorted and got rid of the crap otherwise you just end up boxing up crap.

Also keep current council tax bills etc if you ever need to confirm your identity (new bank account for example).

OTiTO · 19/12/2015 08:43

I agree that it's pointless boxing up the clutter you have to get rid of it. There are no easy answers can- -!its just hard work and determination.
I think it would be silly not to start before Xmas - you will be introducing new crap stuff onto of the old crap stuff

gamingmum · 19/12/2015 11:08

Sometimes you need to do big tidy ups in small bits otherwise in a few days it gets back to how it was. Check out something called Un fuck your habitat. They are on tumbr quite a lot with the idea you do twenty mins cleaning and ten mins something else. Then lists ways to make it easier going forth they also have an app.

Also is good is that people post their own photos of before and after to show you no matter the situation you can get back on top the sinking ship.

OTiTO · 19/12/2015 11:54

It really wouldn't work for me to do 20 mins work and then 10 something else. It would've distracting and would mean everything would take much longer. Surely you have to crack down and do the work. A few days of hard, hard work would make all the difference.

NowBringUsSomeFuzzpiggyPudding · 19/12/2015 12:07

Signing in... me too OP, me too

RaisingSteam · 19/12/2015 12:31

Dh is the king of tidying. Faced with a tip like house his approach is -
Make space
Then sort one room at a time.

Op I think you need to unpick your relationship with hating throwing things away. It's good to pass things on but can be very hard work and it's not good if it is invading your family life and home is becoming a waste transfer station.

You could have a session clearing everything that can go obviously to charity or refuge and take it there immediately.
Don't worry about tidying at this stage. Get rid.

Then whats left you just either tidy up or throw away/recycle at tip. If you can get help do, you might have some friends who would love to help you get sorted but too polite to say!

Notimefortossers · 19/12/2015 14:56

After having two girls and deciding on no more children I got rid of all their stuff. Now find 4 years later I'm accidentally having another girl. But hasn't been a massive 'Oh my God! No! I've got no stuff!' I picked up a clothing bundle from 0-1 year, literally everything I'll need for £30. And nice stuff. You can always replace stuff. And it's not worth keeping if it's messing up your head in the mean time . . . just wish I could explain this to my DH!