Is this shit or am I precious?!

[Grace1467]

DD 14 has secret Santa in her tutor group (there are only 10 in each group). DD went out at the weekend and picked a nice gift for her secret Santa. Anyhow they did it yesterday and they all handed out their gifts. DD didn't get handed one the tutor then said (in an apparently bitchy voice according to DD) "oh oops I forgot to put your name in the hat". So she sat and watched everyone else open theirs then cried in the toilets on the phone to me for ages.

I know this could have been a genuine mistake but DD is convinced this teacher hates her already and I'm slightly heartbroken for her. I know if it had been me I'd have felt a bit miffed as well.

[ArgyMargy]

I can't imagine someone doing this deliberately, however I also can't see why having done it, the teacher didn't go to considerable lengths to make up for her mistake. For me, this crosses a line and I would be making a complaint (not least about the stupid idea of doing secret santa in the first place, ffs).

[Grace1467]

I spoke to DDs head of year she is going to "look into it" but was "sure" it was a genuine mistake. I told her how DD was feeling and she is going to chat with DD about possibly moving into a tutor group with a preferred member of staff. I have met this woman and can see why DD feels the way she does she's very abrupt and a bit of a miserable woman. Think DD will definetly be up for a change of tutor.

DD stayed in toilet for 10 minute tutorial this morning so has not seen her since yesterday so no idea if she had a gift for today. DD seems pretty happy again today, I expect as its last day of term.

Thanks so much for your kind offer (not sure how to tag but the lady who offered a gift very thoughtful) and all the advice

[Orrla]

This happened to me in a workplace once. I was a grown up but it still felt shit being surrounded by all my colleagues showing each other their presents. I would have been gutted if I was a 14 year old girl.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Grace - you can't tag people on here - I tend to highlight their names.

Would your dd like a brooch?

[BertrandRussell]

The teacher screwed up- but actually I'd be more concerned about the behaviour of the other 9 girls. Did they just sit there opening their presents without saying a word? I have a 14 year old, and I would be incandescent if he did that......

[latrilllis]

OP in your shoes I would follow up your conversation with an email, listing what happened according to your dd, what was discussed today, that the head of year agreed to look into it, and that your dd will change tutor group. Then copy this to the head!

I've seen too many schools brush things under the carpet to believe they will 'look into it'.