Burgatroyd 
You are a woman after my own heart -- I used to staple costumes together, and I also stapled the hems of skirts and trousers if they dropped. Life is too short.
Babyjakesmum -- something for you
YYY to dress down days for fundraising instead of costumes. The DCs' school did this at least once a term. There was almost always 100% participation and the children enjoyed it a lot.
There were only two costume days, three if you count Greek play day where they wore sheets and flat sandals or flip flops for the Greek mythology play. The other two events were the Hundredth Day of School for Kindergarten -- they dressed as people aged 100, and Famous Person Day in grade 3 where they picked a famous person, wrote and presented a report on him or her, dressed as that individual. My family did Rosa Parks, Joan of Arc and Michael Jordan plus two others whom I can't remember now. Those were the only three days per child when I had to supply a costume.
Amen to 'death by worksheet', LineyReborn. I know one woman who used to send her DCs to bed at 7.30 and then take out their homework and do it herself with her left hand.
BertrandRussell -- 'no plays, trips?'
Streamlined plays and trips was the compromise my DCs' school arrived at, respecting the fact that the parents have lives to lead and many had younger children, most families had two jobs, and the fact that most parents were paying for their children to attend in hopes of passing entrance exams into selective high schools so academic focus was important.
As well as streamlined plays and performances, costumes were streamlined too and usually consisted of 'shepherd fabric' plus rope, etc. or something parents had many weeks of warning about. The presentations never varied. Each event came ready-made in a binder for the teachers to use so no matter what staff came or went the event remained the same. With five DCs this made for some boring viewing sometimes, but I was glad not to have to spend time or money making or providing costumes for newly designed productions. Actually it wasn't that bad -- there was a little tweaking over the years, but the costumes remained. I am gobsmacked at this talk of Amazon Prime.
My DCs' school had a drama club for those older children who were interested in acting or being stage hands, lighting, etc. Most of my DCs joined the drama club and had a ball with others who appreciated the enterprise. They put on three plays per year, ensemble pieces. Costumes were stockpiled. Most originally came from Goodwill (second hand clothes chain).
Up to age 11, the DCs did a total of three 'dramatic' presentations with their classes -- one singing thing at age 4, another in kindergarten, and the Greek play in 6th grade (everyone participated). They did show and tell in class until first grade, many oral presentations of projects and Q&A sessions every year, writing and reciting poetry, and much individual reading and solo singing in the church at monthly Mass. There was also a church children's choir that was optional.
All the children from Kdg to 3rd grade participated in one evening carol event coming up to Christmas -- there were no individual class Nativity plays, just a church full of parents and grandparents and about 150 children dressed however their parents deemed fit (most wore a Christmassy outfit or school uniform) for one evening. There were absolutely no class Christmas parties.
There was also a tableau involving actors and narrators from 4th grade in the church for Easter every year at a school Mass -- there were no lines to learn, and costumes were plain fabric/sheets that the school stockpiled, plus trousers/shorts/skirts for some roles.
That was easily enough in the drama line for the general school population and the parents.
Each year went on at least two trips per year, which always had to be broadly educational or service oriented (e.g. singing for residents at a local retirement home). There was never a residential trip. The last year always featured a day long ski trip (we get snow here), a trip to a major historical site -- a long day, a trip to a Holocaust museum (long day), a trip to a local art museum with guided tour of the Impressionist exhibits, a trip to see an opera (matinee, longggggg) plus a fancy lunch out. Fundraising by the 8th graders provided a subsidy for these trips.
PTA dues provided many fun assemblies every year so coughing up was strongly urged. You could contribute more than the minimum suggested donation if you wanted.
Wrt the $20 to be left alone thing -- the PTA had a long list of jobs you could volunteer for and the approximate time commitment required for each, so you wouldn't bite off more than you could chew. There were many once-offs like stuffing envelopes or typing names and addresses for an hour or two, or chaperoning a field trip. I got away with applying stage makeup once for the drama club (no prior experience or expertise whatsoever) and going two field trips (Holocaust museum and art trip) plus serving pizza a few times, and I co-chaired the school's big bake sale once. With a large family, I left my volunteering until the last two DCs were almost finished there. We always bought from the bake sales over the years.
Demographic profile -- The school had no catchment area and a mixed intake both socially and in terms of family finances, with many American families (some third generation or more in the school), many blow-ins from other parts of the country, and many immigrants who had no experience of volunteering, no idea what many of the events entailed (a 'sock hop' for instance, or about the school's long tradition of sports, or what the big basketball night was all about). Many parents drove their children long distances to the school. There was a daycare room for all ages that opened at 7 and closed at 6 so parents could drop children off/pick up at convenient times. It was a fee paying school but about one quarter of families received a waiver of tuition and were in effect subsidised by the parish.
The high level of organisation and attention to clear communication arose from the perception that creating a community out of such diverse elements was important, and because fundraising was really important in order to keep on being able to subsidise families who could not otherwise afford to attend -- fundraising tends to be most effective when people feel they are a part of the community raising the money. Like the dramatic and musical presentations, all the fundraisers and all of the events put on such as tea with Santa, etc., had a binder containing all the details anyone would need to know about how to run them, and a timetable for tasks. Literally anyone could volunteer to join the committee that ran the school auction that generated $80K annually, even if they had never participated in anything like that before. A strong esprit de corps contributed to robust academic health too.