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AIBU?

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Original poster

How honest should I be with my very new employer? When I knew I'm intending to leave...

57 replies

BirdsInMyPants · 10/12/2015 21:16

I've applied for a nursing degree for three years running, having applied to one uni in a very popular area and having to fight up to 2k applicants for 40 places it's a tough git to get into.

A few months ago I started working at a school for children with severe learning and physical disabilities. At the same time as applying for the third time to this nursing degree.

I bloody LOVE my job, the children, my co-workers, my boss, the boss up, etc etc. It's a very caring setting and utterly amazing. In the perfect world, I'd be a qualified nurse in the same place (but I'd be employed by the NHS
then, not the school)

Anyway I went for the degree interview and I got in. I don't start until Feb 2017 but I have my 3 month 'probation interview' coming up for work. They want to know my plans for the future and stuff.

Am I honest straight away? (Could they sack me?). Do I hint at it, and wait until later? Do I say nothing and give a terms notice this time next year?

I want to tell them now, I want to be totally honest since I will work there for a further 14 months but I'm worried they will ditch me if they know now.

I love my job and dread leaving it. My only silver lining is that I can go back during placements and eventually work there again, but with a career.

OP posts:
thelouise · 10/12/2015 21:18

YWBU to tell them. The start date is well over a year away. Just relax and enjoy the job. Oh and huge congrats on getting a place. :)

witsender · 10/12/2015 21:18

I wouldn't tell them. It is a long way away, wait until nearer the time. There may be some way of tying in a placement later down the line.

witsender · 10/12/2015 21:18

And congrats!

wasonthelist · 10/12/2015 21:19

No experience of public sector employers, but in the private sector I would lie every time.

NoMoreGrimble · 10/12/2015 21:19

Don't say anything, enjoy the next year and congratulations!

wasonthelist · 10/12/2015 21:20

Oh, and it's slightly different from lying...

Original poster
BirdsInMyPants · 10/12/2015 21:20

there may be some way of trying in a placement later down the line.

I don't understand what you mean.

Thank you for the congrats though! It was a long slog, and a very long one to come. I can't wait.

OP posts:
CountryRoadTakeMeHome · 10/12/2015 21:21

Honesty is the best policy so the saying goes Xmas Wink

Your employer can not sack you it would be against employment laws. I would think they would really appreciate your honesty and they have got over a year to advertise.

Glad you enjoy such a hard but rewarding job. And congratulations on making the cut into uni. Good luck Xmas Wink

chipsandpeas · 10/12/2015 21:22

Your employer can not sack you it would be against employment laws

you can be sacked in the first 2 years of employment for no reason given unless it falls under discrimination

my advice would be to keep quiet and maybe let the know this time next year

Original poster
BirdsInMyPants · 10/12/2015 21:23

Oh wow I'm surprised by the responses!

The thing is, I would be lying. Apparently they ask what you see your future in is. If I'm not honest I'd be lying.

OP posts:
toffeeboffin · 10/12/2015 21:25

2017?

A lot can happen between now and then.

Do NOT say anything to your current employer. Think how good another 14 month's relevant work experience will look on your cv - blooming great!

scratchandsniff · 10/12/2015 21:26

Don't say anything. You're going to work there for another 12mths, you're not screwing them over. And yes they could legitimately sack you.

carolinemoon · 10/12/2015 21:28

Your employer can definitely sack you for no reason if you haven't been there 2 years.

They can't expect anyone to make a long term commitment. Just say that you love it and want to stay - that is the truth, even though you know you will have to leave in 2017.

Don't tell blatant porkies (don't talk about timescales) but don't tell the truth unless you want to risk your job.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 10/12/2015 21:28

Lie, then.

It's over a year away, and things change. Both in the school, and in your life. Even if everything stays the same, there is no point giving them more than a year's warning that you don't see your future there. You'll just make them all a bit more distant from you, and a bit less invested in your future.

You see your immediate future as being there, and you're probably doing a good job. Nobody loses if you let them think that you have no plans to leave.

I wouldn't thank any of my team telling me that they plan to leave in a year. It'd mean I couldn't put them forward for things or develop their skills in good faith, because I'd know they planned to leave, but it'd also be too early for me to tell anyone else or replace them.

toffeeboffin · 10/12/2015 21:29

They want to know what your plans for the future? Just mention how much you love working there.

You never know, they might offer you something, paid nursing degree or something?

peggyundercrackers · 10/12/2015 21:32

I think it would be unfair not to tell them. They will invest time and money into training you and your going to walk out? They will be mighty pissed off and you will burn all your bridges with them.

If you love them all and your job you would tell them.

confusedandemployed · 10/12/2015 21:32

Dont say anything. I work in HR - seriously, say nothing.

If they ask you that question say "I would absolutely love my job here to be a long term arrangement". It's no more or less than the truth - you don't have to say that you'd like to return as a nurse.

toffeeboffin · 10/12/2015 21:33

Like Anchor said, what's the point in telling them now? It's too far away.

If you tell them they may fire you. Then you'd have to job hunt, start all over again etc.

Not worth it

GreyBird84 · 10/12/2015 21:33

I consider myself honest & upfront in these situations.
But in this case I would definately not say you have been accepted into nursing - huge congrats by the way!

It's over a year away. A lot can change.

Shutthatdoor · 10/12/2015 21:34

Your employer can not sack you it would be against employment laws

Under 2 years employment they certainly can

toffeeboffin · 10/12/2015 21:35

They will be 'mightly pissed off'?

What, if she works for them for another year? And seriously, who gives a fuck if they're pissed off?

She's trying to improve her life ffs.

toffeeboffin · 10/12/2015 21:37

P. S. Congrats OP.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 10/12/2015 21:42

A year is plenty of time to commit to them. Don't tell them. You're an asset, they will get the benefit of you for a whole year, they are the lucky ones!

A man would probably not consider this a question to even ask himself by the way. Women really hold themselves back a lot of the time by not recognising their value.

LaLyra · 10/12/2015 21:48

I wouldn't tell them. By all means at some point late next year give them good notice, but it's over a year away - anything could happen in that time frame.

Don't cut your opportunities with them (promotion, extra training/duties etc won't go to someone they know is leaving) when your circumstances could change in the next 14/15 months.

MoreSnowPlease · 10/12/2015 21:55

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