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How honest should I be with my very new employer? When I knew I'm intending to leave...

57 replies

BirdsInMyPants · 10/12/2015 21:16

I've applied for a nursing degree for three years running, having applied to one uni in a very popular area and having to fight up to 2k applicants for 40 places it's a tough git to get into.

A few months ago I started working at a school for children with severe learning and physical disabilities. At the same time as applying for the third time to this nursing degree.

I bloody LOVE my job, the children, my co-workers, my boss, the boss up, etc etc. It's a very caring setting and utterly amazing. In the perfect world, I'd be a qualified nurse in the same place (but I'd be employed by the NHS
then, not the school)

Anyway I went for the degree interview and I got in. I don't start until Feb 2017 but I have my 3 month 'probation interview' coming up for work. They want to know my plans for the future and stuff.

Am I honest straight away? (Could they sack me?). Do I hint at it, and wait until later? Do I say nothing and give a terms notice this time next year?

I want to tell them now, I want to be totally honest since I will work there for a further 14 months but I'm worried they will ditch me if they know now.

I love my job and dread leaving it. My only silver lining is that I can go back during placements and eventually work there again, but with a career.

OP posts:
MiscellaneousAssortment · 11/12/2015 10:16

Definitely don't tell them. Although you want to do it and are dead set it will happen, life can change, and it's so far away, you can't say with all certainty it will happen. Job losses, relationship problems, debt, or your children's needs, parent illness or changes in circumstances, relocation etc etc etc... Not wishing gloomy things on you, but just pointing out that for better or worse, life isn't predictable and to potentially damage your employment prospects on a far off plan, well, it's not doing yourself any favours!

If they ask about the future, you could say that you'd love to continue working there (which is true), but eventually it would be amazing to be able to requalify and work for them as a nurse/ different position. I would be clear that you are enjoying and satisfied working for them and feel so lucky to be working there, and make sure they hear your future plans as a possibility in the far off future vs a definite plan and a done deal. Use phrases like 'in a few years' and 'eventually', 'potentially' or 'if possible'.

Yes that would involve lying, but I don't think your job would be safe if you don't.

You will be kissing goodbye to any sense of returned loyalty to you, they will regard you as expendable, temporary and therefore excluded from promotion, wage increases, professional development, and held at arms length in team and working culture. If you're regarded as temporary or not committed to them, then they may decide to look for your replacement sooner rather than later. Assuming you're a great employee, with passion and skill in your role, then you'd be making the school miss out on a good employee who can add a lot, as well as ruining it for yourself. Not a good thing for them or you.

And this way, they get a great employee who may be able to keep ties with them and returns to them in a different position.

By the way, I know some professions are still rooted in a more established working culture, but the world has changed.

Many (most?) sectors are no longer about the job for life, or even the job for years. There was a report released recently that predicted children growing up now may have 20+ jobs in their working lives, and in at least 4 different industries. People (bosses and employees) can no longer plan their futures over decades. People are now existing with 'foreshortened futures' where they can only plan for the next year or two at the most. Not great for stability, but great for seizing opportunities and being agile and adaptable.

Over a year is a long time now, I certainly wouldn't be able to employ people who said they'd want to stay for 5+ yrs. Whereas a few years ago, interviewees would say that even if they didn't quite believe it themselves (!). Now people, especially in their 20s will openly say they can't plan that far ahead although they're very committed to the job. This will become the norm across industries.

notquitehuman · 11/12/2015 11:14

Congrats on your uni place. I probably wouldn't tell a potential employer about my plans though. In the next year anything could happen. It sounds awful, but lots of things could come up that mean you need to defer. Fees could sky rocket, the uni department could close, you may even decide it's not the course for you. In the meantime, you've missed out on what sounds like a great opportunity.

Have a great year with them, and if by next December the course is still go, then tell them you've just been offered a place. If your performance has been good then you might be able to negotiate some part time hours or future placements. And it'll look great on your CV!

The alternative is to be honest with employers. But what then? They'll either treat you as temporary, or you'll be looking at a much smaller pool of stop gap jobs that won't give relevant experience.

phoenix1973 · 11/12/2015 11:23

Think about YOURSELF and your future. Don't tell them.

Daisysbear · 11/12/2015 11:34

I assumed from your title that you were going in the next few weeks. You're planning to stay with your current employer for the next fourteen months. I don't think you have any explaining to do. That's not an imminent departure, just normal progression.

IWasHereBeforeTheHack · 11/12/2015 11:49

A man took up a job in our place. After 4 weeks he resigned, citing a family emergency in his home country. He was working out his notice, which seemed odd to me if there really was a family emergency half way across the world. It was a lie of course: he'd resigned to take another job that suited him better.

In your case, be vague but positive about wanting to work there long term. Remember you can hand in your notice ahead of the minimum period (eg if you need to give 1 month's notice you can always tell them with 3 months to go, explaining that you want to give them plenty of time to replace you).

You can explain later that - for example - although you had been offered a place you had to secure funding to allow you to undertake the course of study and therefore couldn't risk resigning until you had everything confirmed.

Well done!

whois · 11/12/2015 11:58

Say nothing, then give your required amount of notice.

Woobeedoo · 11/12/2015 21:52

My MIL got a retail job in a sector that she didn't really like but the pay was decent. After a month there the boss asked her if she was enjoying the job to which she told him "I'm more used to working in xyz retail, so if I hear of anyone with a vacancy I'll be leaving". She was called back to his office at the end if the day and told not to bother coming back.

I wouldn't tell them, be the great employee and then leave (giving a good notice period) when you have to.

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