To not take our pet back home

[Teenagecrisisagain]

We have been having a huge amount of work done in the house for the last few months.

A few weeks ago (when it was very disruptive/dusty/noisy) we asked dm if she would mind having our rabbit till the work is finished. She agreed. He has a big indoor cage and an outside run. Dh dropped it all round to dm

I go there after school drop off to feed him and dh goes through clean litter tray etc when it needs doing. At weekend dm feeds him.

The work is nowhere near finished and our house is an absolute tip atm
Dm has declared today the rabbit has to be gone by Christmas ??? She knows we are nowhere near completion of the work and that we have a house full at Xmas.

Dm in the other hand will be alone in a big three bed house and is complaining she wants her house 'tidy' for Xmas (by 'tidy' she just means no rabbit as house is spotless except for one room where dsis has stored furniture for 2.5 years)

AIBU to just say no? If we don't actually take him home she has no way of getting him back to ours herself and I'm annoyed as we had agreed she would have him till the house was ready?

Is she spending Christmas 'alone in a 3 bed house' while you have lots of people over? I hope you don't mean on actual Christmas Day. If you do, I'm would be careful Bunny didn't end up in a pot for Xmas dinner!

I wouldn't want someone else pet in my house.

She wants a quiet Christmas. Move the rabbit.

Tbh I wouldn't be happy with people in and out all the time to look after a pet that's not mine.

It just seems like she's picked her moment she knows how nich there still is to do and how busy/stressed we are and has dictated to us again

Over the weekend dh cleaned the rabbit out completely, four hours later dm called saying it needed doing again so dh had to go back to dm being quite smirky about it. Sometimes I think she does it just to be difficult and that's why she suddenly wants him gone by Xmas despite previously saying however long was ok

But if your house is such a mess as to not be able to accommodate your rabbit (who would be contained in a hutch/run/cage), why have you agreed to so many guests? How on earth will you manage to cook anything? Does the rabbit live in the kitchen?

It was a condition that we came in daily to feed him etc she wanted us to in return for allowing him to stay there

Yes she always does this at Xmas , wants to be alone. Refuses invitations yet will then do something on Xmas day like cook dinner and throw it away and then call us to tell us what she's done and cry then want a visitor :(

You are being so unreasonable it's scary. She already has one of her children taking the mick with furniture and now she has another one with a living breathing animal.

Find somewhere to take him and pay for it if you have to. He's your responsibility!

You can't leave him there if she doesn't want him in her house anymore.

Rabbit boarding is very cheap, I would look into that and he would also be fed, cleaned out by them etc if you can't make it there every day.

Or buy a shed for your garden, but it will have to be insulated and heated at least for this year as he hasn't had time to build up a proper winter coat.

You sound really committed to him but just so you know there isnt an indoor cage on the market that is sufficiently large for a rabbit. A decent sized shed would solve this too.

The house may just be ok by Xmas day but it will be cutting it very fine as to when dh could even pick him up. Ds has hospital Xmas eve afternoon too so we are very busy

Rabbit usually lives in the space under the stairs which currently ant be used and all the other rooms are either full of stuff or not used due to building/decorating etc etc

Front room is too small to put him in there temporarily especially with the Xmas tree in the only space we have free . I know though if I said to dm " oh ok we will take him and just not have a tree up this year , dcs will be sad but you come first " she'd be fine with that which says a lot to me

If she has form for this then you need to stop asking her to do you favours. Some people like the idea of being helpful more than the reality, others blow hot and cold to get a reaction. If your mum is like this just ignore. take your rabbit, say thanks, don't get yourself into that situation again.

Look at it this way - if when you'd asked her she'd just said "no" you'd have found another solution. So this is no different except that you've had X weeks of free rabbit hosting (I won't say care cause it seems you've done most of that anyway). So she has done you a favour, just not a very big one.

YABU.

Everytime your mum does something for you there is a drama, usually there is one with your MIL, or your sister too. It's been like that for the 8 years I've been on MN. Why do you bother asking them to do anything, it must be exhausting.

We looked after DS3's 2 kittens while he sorted stuff out. A year we had them .

Lovely as they were, had we wanted kittens we'd have had some of our own.

Perhaps your DM feels the same.

She's generally like that. I think having the rabbit there has meant guaranteed daily visits which she has liked :( but now she is just being difficult

The dcs playroom may be an option but currently it's full of bin bags and the workmen use it to go in and out to garden as it's by the back door. May be too cold / draughty for him I'm not sure . Unless I stick a fleece in the hutch (or will be eat it and get sick?)
I'll have to see if I can free that room up as there is nowhere else for him to go we are knee deep in 'stuff' throughout the whole house

If she's an awkward sod at Christmas anyway then you really should have seen this coming. Don't feed the drama, just find somewhere else and cheerily pick him up sooner rather than later and let her move onto the next thing.

Does she maybe want you all to go to hers for Christmas Day but doesn't want to suggest it?

What would you have done if DM had said no to the rabbit from the start?? I presume you still would've got the work done and had to make other arrangements.

If she had said no I think we would have waited till after Xmas to start the work !

I would speak to her and agree 2 week break over Christmas and board Rabbit for that time. She has already saved you considerable cost albeit not hassle - sounds like she has OCD and its freaking her out to be honest

But even if you waited until after Xmas you'd still need somewhere for the rabbit wouldn't you?

We used to go to her every year on Boxing Day but she would be so so horrible we stopped

Last year she was seriously ill at Xmas

You rabbit will be smelly(all animals smell) it is time consuming and she doesnt want to be responsible for it any more she did you a favour for a short while if your house is upside down dusty and what not why are you having people over for dinner but cant cope with a rabbit go get it and just move it about rooms where work isnt getting done or ask somebody else to look after it

Yes but I think we would try a different schedule of work if it had been after Xmas with the rabbit at home but we went for it all as dm had agreed to help

Wow loads of drip feeding!!

You would have waited to get the work done? Because of the rabbit?

Really?

If she has form you are still bu for asking her for a favour if she is such a pita.

Yes we would have had to stagger the work/do a room at a time at her than trying to do it all at once like we have