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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to want him to take this unpractical gift back

155 replies

Mrsbattleaxe · 27/11/2015 09:33

This year me and DH have decided to reign in christmas for one another. DC has been bought for with a few bits left to get. Me and him need nothing and don't really want anything apart from a few practical little bits.

We have not long moved and there is a fair bit we need to do with the house when the weather gets a bit better. We have a bit saved up for this and have said that money has been put aside for x y & z and he was happy with that. We have been together 13years and have done the extravagant gifts in the past and tbh we both agreed it's very hard to buy for each other now.

I had a tesco delivery yesterday and ordered a few nice chocs wine biccies ECT to put away for Xmas so thought this morn il pop them down in the garage.

We have a half converted double garage, the previous owners have left the garage doors on but have had flooring laid and a false celling put in so its in effect a large room. As it's not attached to the house we were unsure what to do with the space but loved the potential of it so decided on it being a games room for the time being and it gets used when people visit.

Have taken the tesco stuff down there this morn and I thought we had been burgled as there is boxes and stuff strewn across the floor and we do keep the side door open so dc can go in when whenever. We have been storing the new Christmas decs and some gifts, panicking thinking someone has gone through the boxes.

I've seen something in the corner wrapped with old bed sheets and old rough looking foam so have gone over and had a look, it's a full size fruit machine. One that you see in a pub.

I had a wtf moment and thought where has this come from. Then thought he has bought it for himself but why without saying anything. It's not useful, we don't need it and there are plenty of things and work that needs doing.

I've gone back to the house to text DH to ask what the hell and I have a message from him saying down go down to the garage as he is storing my Xmas gifts in there.

So am I right in thinking this is my Xmas gift? It is isn't it. He has form for this kind of thing but it got nipped in the bud a few years back after I admired a basketball hoop in a sports shop saying its a shame it's no good for dc as at that age I would of loved one. I ended up with that for Christmas.

In a way it's sweet he does listen but it has happened many years in a row and I had to have a tactful chat with him how I felt I couldn't look at anything without fearing he was going to get it.

I have no interest in fruit machines, never even been on one so why he thought it was a good idea is beyond me. I don't want to come across as ungrateful but I just wanted some nice chocs slippers and pjs this year.

He set a max £200 budget last week. He did simular last year and bought gifts up to the budget and then bought me a MacBook. It was a nice thought but impractical and I had no use for it so it got returned. I felt awful Christmas day that our gifts weren't equal and deciding how to tell him I really didn't need this gift.

Do I speak to him now? Do I tell him I've seen it? I don't think I can fake enthusiasm for this on Christmas Day and he's going to be disappointed.

AIBU to think it's got to go?

OP posts:
Mrsbattleaxe · 27/11/2015 13:39

I honestly don't think he's ever played on one either. So I can't think it's in disguise as a gift for himself. Also he would just say I want a fruit machine can I get one. The answer would still be no I'm sure.

Even a pinball machine would be surely better?

Urgh you lot are so right, I am so going to win those worse gift threads.

OP posts:
LaContessaDiPlump · 27/11/2015 13:41

So.... why on earth did he get it in that case?!

Maybe someone was giving it away for free and he decided it would be a good frivolous gift because it was free?

That would be worse tbh.

RamblingRedRose · 27/11/2015 13:45

I remember the perfume thread. It was weird. This is weird too though. Good luck with the chat.

rainbowstardrops · 27/11/2015 13:49

WTAF?!!!! A fruit machine even though you have shown zero desire for one? That is weird!!!
Maybe suggest you buy your own presents in future Grin

Goingtobeawesome · 27/11/2015 13:57

Duh, the fruit machine isn't your present. It's for him. It may be hidden behind it is your present but we all know, well most of us know, it is for him.

Notimefortossers · 27/11/2015 13:59

OP please do post and tell us how your chat went! Sorry! This is hilarious! Grin (and absolutely something that my husband would do, so you have my full sympathies)

Notimefortossers · 27/11/2015 14:01

DH and I have a no presents for each other at Christmas rule and always have done since we have kids. It's such an expensive time I see no reason to add to it for no reason . . . plus he buys rubbish presents! Lol!

landrover · 27/11/2015 14:14

I always buy my own present and tell DH what he has bought me! Smile

Keeptrudging · 27/11/2015 14:18

I feel a bit sorry for him. DH and I buy each other very random presents, it's fun and better than perfume/chocolates/jewellery.

You've got an empty games room, there's plenty of room for it, it would be fun to play when you've got guests round. It's not in your house so it's never going to be an eyesore in the corner annoying you.

Notimefortossers · 27/11/2015 14:23

see no reason to add to it for no reason

Man I'm tired Grin

Janeymoo50 · 27/11/2015 14:32

OMG...a fruit machine, hilarious for totally all the wrong reasons!!!

LineyReborn · 27/11/2015 14:34

I can't really warm to the idea of it being fun to play on an old fruit machine in someone's freezing cold garage.

Keeptrudging · 27/11/2015 14:39

It sounded like they were going to use it when they had guests round, so I wasn't picturing a cold/damp garage, more just a big empty space. If I had an old fruit machine, my friends would play it, same as when we've been in holiday homes with football tables. Ooh, you could get a football table to go with it...Grin!

MrsHathaway · 27/11/2015 14:42

DH: that is your Xmas gift. You've spoilt the suprise now, never mind hope you like it.
Me: please tell me this is a wind up?
DH: no why would it be.

Oh dear.

Not only did he not get that you weren't happy, he didn't even take the chance to pretend it was for someone else and work out how the fuck to get rid of it and get a big box of chocolates or a Russell & Bromley voucher or something.

Good luck with your chat.

LineyReborn · 27/11/2015 14:43

All garages are freezing, especially detached ones, IME. Maybe next year OP will get a calor gas heater for Christmas so she can play on the fruit machine during blizzards Grin

Frostycake · 27/11/2015 14:50

Reminds me of an ex-boyfriend who bought me a) boxing gloves and b) an off the shoulder & practically backless top (I used to have 34GG breasts)!

Some people struggle with gift giving. Your DH sounds like one of them. Best thing to do is ask him if it's for you. If yes, tell him to return it and then set up a wishlist on Amazon that he can choose items from in future.

A fruit machine though Confused

Keeptrudging · 27/11/2015 14:51
Grin
diddl · 27/11/2015 14:56

"DH: that is your Xmas gift. You've spoilt the suprise now, never mind hope you like it.
Me: please tell me this is a wind up?
DH: no why would it be."

OP, how did you not reply-"because what in the name of fuck made you think that I'd want a bloody stupid fruit machine?"

Or something like that!

Whatevva · 27/11/2015 15:21

Can't see the point of owning a fruit machine unless you want to fleece your guests Hmm. They aren't called one-armed bandits for nothing.....

Pinball would be more fun.

KurriKurri · 27/11/2015 15:49

I am assuming he has bought a fruit machine for you because he likes fruit machines and wants one Grin

If you have a budget of £200 each, if as you guess the fruit machine cost £50 then I would tell him it is part of his present he has chosen it he can have it and you will buy him a surprise with the other £150.

I do think buying something enormous and niche is a bit daft - I would always check with the person if I was going down that path unless I knew for certain they wanted it because they had been mentioning it for years.

expatinscotland · 27/11/2015 16:06

Just don't take this lying down or feel guilted into keeping the fucking thing as your present. Get it gone and next year, you buy your own presents or give each other a list to chose from. The response of you spoiled the surprise, hope you like it would get on my wick. 'No, actually, I don't like it at all. We discussed this and agreed no impractical gifts.'

CatMilkMan · 27/11/2015 16:21

after reading through the thread I'm seriously tempted to buy my DP a fruit machine for Christmas.

Mrsbattleaxe · 27/11/2015 16:25

DH has come home. We have had a chat about all this.

The story is, he was looking for something to go in the garage for us all to enjoy. He originally thought of a penny falls type machine or a toy claw grabber machine but they cost a fortune. Anyway he got chatting to a friend about it who knew someone with a fruit machine for sale.

His friend is a very pushy sort of person. DH didn't say anything about the fruit machine but but his friend called him up and said he got him a great deal on it and has sorted a mate with a van to get it here. And he went along with it. (His friend is very pushy and not really the person you say no to! He's nice but you just wouldn't piss him off)

I had decided earlier that as long as it didn't cost a fortune that I would be inclined to let it stay here and would be used when friends come round.

But after hearing about how he got it, not even wanted it. I'm actually fuming.

If he had bought penny falls / toy grabber, it still would of been unpractical but I would of actually thought it was a sweet guesture that we could all enjoy and spend some time on. And how cool for a party for DC who is 9.

This friend of his is actually coming over tomorrow with his wife and I'm so tempted to tell him to arrange for it to get gone.

I don't know why I'm so angry now as if DH would of chosen it, it could of stayed after we had another Xmas gift chat but now I know why it's here I'm so fucking angry.

I don't know why he couldn't come to me and say I've fucked up instead of palming this off on me!

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 27/11/2015 16:29

'This friend of his is actually coming over tomorrow with his wife and I'm so tempted to tell him to arrange for it to get gone'

I would text this person now. Only tempted to get it gone? No, fuck him. 'Not really a person you say no to' is someone I'd delete out of my life.

'He's nice but you just wouldn't piss him off' - why does he has superpowers? He's not nice, he's a fuckwit.

I would be fucking livid. This isn't even a gift.

RandomMess · 27/11/2015 16:35

Perhaps bring up a discussion with friends how anti-gambling you are, and then your DH can tell his friend he needs to get rid of it pronto!