Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want the ground to swallow me up?

26 replies

jamesdeandaydream · 04/11/2015 23:29

I sent half naked pics to an ex. I've put on weight and carried/given birth to a baby since I last saw him. He hasn't replied. I want to cry.

I thought the photos looked ok but the more I look, the more I can see the imperfections and I wish I hadn't sent them. Oh good god what have I done.

OP posts:
honeyroar · 04/11/2015 23:32

How long ago did you send them? Had you been flirting first? I'm just trying to understand why you would. But on a positive note, I think that men don't see half as many imperfections as we do.

Do you see him in real life much? If he doesn't respond would you have to face him? If not don't worry!

Fatmomma99 · 04/11/2015 23:32

I am absolutely sure your body is beautiful. He's a wanker.

You've carried and given birth to a baby!

That's your priority, and your baby will think you're amazing.

Move on. He has lost out!

ghostyslovesheep · 04/11/2015 23:33

oh sweety - I bet you look fine but seriously - why would you do that!

please don't put so much store in his approval

Farandole · 04/11/2015 23:33

Oh dear, so sorry for you. Try not to worry about it - is he a decent man or not?

catfordbetty · 04/11/2015 23:35

Not a good idea. Whether he responds or not, keep your fingers crossed that he doesn't share them. What were you thinking?

TheHouseOnTheLane · 04/11/2015 23:35

Fuck him OP! Forget it immediately.

trapdooragain · 04/11/2015 23:37

text say sorry wrong man grab your dignity and run?

Original poster
jamesdeandaydream · 04/11/2015 23:37

He's replied with a photo. It's all good. I have no idea what I was thinking honestly! Oh god. Never again.

OP posts:
NotTheSpiceOfLife · 04/11/2015 23:40

What sort of a photo Wink

TheHouseOnTheLane · 04/11/2015 23:42

Is he nudey in the pic OP? Grin

Original poster
jamesdeandaydream · 04/11/2015 23:43

Yes it's not the sort you'd display on the mantlepiece that's for sure Grin

OP posts:
Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 04/11/2015 23:46

Oh Dear. Well I know one thing you certainly can't unsend them and I don't think anyone looks anywhere near as bad on pictures than they believe they do.
But without sounding awful where on earth is your self respect. I mean sending naked pictures to a current partner is while not my style is one thing but to an ex is very much another.
Do you want him back. If so then disrespecting your self by sending half naked pictures is not the best way to go about it.
Because you sent those pictures for a reason.
If you want him back or are feeling a bit down. We're here to hold your hand and advise you as best you can. But you need to know that you don't need to resort to sending part naked pictures to an ex.

If you want a reconciliation or even just regular meet ups then text him. Invite him around for coffee and to talk. If he refused well ztv least you know where you stand, and you have had his love. It's not as though it is unrequited love, and if a reconciliation is not on the cards, then. Although it may take time you move on and one day the right man will come along because he's out there somewhere
He hasn't replied. Does he even have the same mobile number..Flowers

Original poster
jamesdeandaydream · 04/11/2015 23:46

I never knew you there was a type of extreme embarrassment where your entire face and jaw goes numb until tonight. I've learnt so much!

OP posts:
catfordbetty · 04/11/2015 23:46

it's not the sort you'd display on the mantlepiece

Useful insurance.

TheHouseOnTheLane · 04/11/2015 23:47

Are you hoping to rekindle things OP?

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 04/11/2015 23:48

Oh just seen your update. Glad he's got back to you

Original poster
jamesdeandaydream · 04/11/2015 23:54

No I don't want him back. We were basically friends with benefits and at the moment we're both single and hoping to meet up this weekend for sex a catch up. I've sent him pics before (don't judge me). At least he's replied even if he is secretly thinking I look like a whale.

OP posts:
Pancake2015 · 04/11/2015 23:54

Life lesson learnt, ey? Dont ever send pics like that, to anyone. Ever.

My ex boyfriend (when together) asked me to send a pic in my nicks. So i sent hi. a close up of the brand of nicks i was wearing. He was obviously secretly disappointed and asked me to send one with my nicks off. So i put a pair of nicks on the floor and took a pic. Technically, it was a pic of my nicks off. I couldnt move for laughing.
He never did get a rudey pic of me.

sleeponeday · 05/11/2015 00:03

He doesn't think you look like a whale, you daft wuzzock. He was probably otherwise engaged after getting them, then had to locate some tissues take a pic of his own.

Wouldn't ever send them, though. I don't trust anyone alive that much. And I've been married over a decade, and with DH almost twice that. Never send a photo you'd mind your mother, boss, and the bloke next to you on a train seeing. Because people are arseholes, and sadly, sometimes they are people you would previously have trusted with your life. Many threads on Relationships evidence this.

sleeponeday · 05/11/2015 00:03

Pancake that is beautiful. Grin

icelollycraving · 05/11/2015 00:05

I don't think it's about self respect ^
Lots of people do it,it's not the wisest move but good god there's little point making her feel worse. I suspect meeting for a coffee isn't quite what she was hoping for!
If you're going to do naked pics,make sure you aren't identifiable is my only advice.

icelollycraving · 05/11/2015 00:08

pancake that reminded me of the time a guy I'd been talking to online sent me a picture of him wanking on the side of his bath. He wanted a great picture of my hot pussy. I sent one.
My cat was very photogenic.

Pancake2015 · 05/11/2015 00:24

Icelolly haha ive done that one too. He also used the phrase "send me a pic of ya bush" (how lovely) so i sent a pic of my christmas tree

SoleBizzzz · 05/11/2015 00:45

Pancake Grin

SolidGoldBrass · 05/11/2015 01:16

So I take it you sent them partway through a flirty conversation, not just out of the blue after having had no contact for months... Don't fret about it. He sounds like he's still up for fun.
I've just had some very rude text sex with the bloke I have lined up for a shag on Sunday...