Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WIBU to leave teenage DD home alone one night so I can spend the night shagging in a hotel?

90 replies

HotelShagger · 03/11/2015 22:13

DD is 14 and a homebird. She also has near-supersonic hearing, and usually goes to bed at the same time as me and DH. The walls are thin enough that we can hold conversations with each other from each other's rooms. We deal with it by DTD as quietly as possible. DH and me are huge fans of loud, active sex but that isn't going to happen while DD is at home, and hasn't happened for a long time. I know I should probably be grateful to be having any sex at all. I am, but I'd like to be able to really let loose for once. I want to have a proper, noisy shag with us making as much noise as we feel making, without worrying about traumatising DD or being slapped with noise abatement orders by the neighbours. Grin

WIBU to leave DD at home for one night so we could sneak off to a cheap hotel? She hasn't been on her own overnight before. It would be a Friday or Saturday in case anyone is wondering. Alternatively if anyone has any suggestions about getting away with loud DTDing when you have older kids at home, I would welcome them.

OP posts:
laffymeal · 03/11/2015 22:16

Yeah, right.

Mehitabel6 · 03/11/2015 22:17

Have a friend for a sleepover and then let her go for a sleepover.
I wouldn't leave her alone.
Any relatives? School trips, camping with the guides etc all good opportunities.

BestZebbie · 03/11/2015 22:17

Isn't this the point of Guide Camp and/or sleepover at a friend's house? Does she never go away overnight herself at all? (That would seem much preferable to me than you going to a hotel without her which will either come across as leaving her out or horribly TMI or both).

321rd · 03/11/2015 22:18

Yes, what's wrong with sorting out a sleepover for her. Or dtd when she is out. She must go out some time!!

RhinestoneCowgirl · 03/11/2015 22:18

Take time off work and have sex whilst she's at school?

Tartyflette · 03/11/2015 22:21

Errmm... Doesn't she go to school? And can't you and DH arrange the odd day off together for an ostensible trip to Ikea Grin or, er,, something?

80sWaistcoat · 03/11/2015 22:21

Take a day off work when she's at school.

Tartyflette · 03/11/2015 22:21

Cross post!

QOD · 03/11/2015 22:26

Omg my dd (16) causes this issue for us.
plus dh and I have sep rooms so if I were to march right across dds door and get in bed with dh, old bat ears would know.
she did ncs in the sumer and omfg we had sex! If she meets her friends we arrange a.session lmao

It's a ridiculous problem, at least you and your dh share and can have a sneaky quiet sesh !

holeinmyheart · 03/11/2015 22:26

Has she got a friend who you could encourage her to invite for a sleepover and then they have to invite her back?

Hotels are not exactly soundproofed either. Will you be staying for breakfast?
I have just been away for a week in a four star and I think I would have easily been able to hear orgasmic grunting.

I wouldn't leave a 14 year old over night personally. Imagine the headlines.
' child has accident while home alone, whist Parents have a shag in hotel '

It would be OK if nothing happened, which it probably wouldn't, but if it it did, your name would be mud.

QOD · 03/11/2015 22:27

Oh erm anyway, yeah get her somewhere else for the night

ilovesooty · 03/11/2015 22:33

Perhaps you could save money by renting a hotel room for a couple of hours. Grin

ILiveAtTheBeach · 03/11/2015 22:38

You would be committing a crime. Children cannot legally be left overnight until they are at least 16 years of age. Just let her have a night at her grandparents or something, fgs. 14 is far too young. What are you thinking?!

SavageBeauty73 · 03/11/2015 22:39

sleepovers!!!

I wouldn't leave my 14 year old alone overnight nor would she want to be left.

MajesticWhine · 03/11/2015 22:42

I wouldn't leave my 15yo alone for the night. If she has no friends inviting her for a sleepover, then a sneaky shag in the day time is your best bet. Or Gparents for the weekend.

IHaveBrilloHair · 03/11/2015 22:44

It's not a crime.
I left my teen overnight this summer and stayed in a hotel, no shagging though, I was having a meal/drinks with friends.
Dd was happy to be left, lots of calls etc, my friend on hand if needed, very safe area.

Mrsmorton · 03/11/2015 22:45

We went to Sunday school so my parents could [euphemism] it's a family joke now. My mum's been an atheist since she was 15!

Mehitabel6 · 03/11/2015 22:49

It isn't a crime- there is no law about age. Advice is not to leave under 16yr olds. You could be prosecuted if thought neglectful.

MoriartyIsMyAngel · 03/11/2015 22:55

As someone else said, just go and check into a hotel in the day, much easier, and no need to worry.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 03/11/2015 22:57

I wouldn't leave her overnight.

dh had to take annual leave to conceive our second child so I do sympathise Wink

CatMilkMan · 03/11/2015 22:58

She's 14, do it.

IrritableBitchSyndrome · 03/11/2015 22:59

Ohhhhh... THAT's why my atheist mum sent us to Sunday school... d'oh!

PennyPants · 03/11/2015 22:59

What if she invited her boyfriend round/has a party/gets worried/sets house on fire with hair straighters?
Yabu until she is 16 or thereabouts.
Just pop some loud music on when you DTD or send her to the shop with a long list.

CatMilkMan · 03/11/2015 22:59

If I was you I would be wondering what to do, if I was your daughter I would be begging you to have a night off.

tinkywinkyshandbag · 03/11/2015 23:00

We have a similar issue but 2 DD's so even if one is at a sleepover it very rarely happens they both are, on the same night. DH works from home occasionally so we have the odd shag break during the day! DD's often want to stay up after us (old gimmers) and come in for cuddles in the mornings so thats not an option either, nor would a lock on the door be an option, we've never had one so it would be a bit wierd just to put one one and they would wonder what we were up to! I think parents of teenagers just don't have sex.