to breastfeed in public even though DH is uncomfortable with it and thinks I should find somewhere private?

[Sequine]

DS is 7weeks. He often struggles to latch and slips off repeatedly during a feed, so I dislike feeding under a shawl and find it hard to be discreet, as I need to keep reattaching him. I wear wrap dresses so I can just pull dress and bra down at one side. I don't really care if anyone sees my breast and don't feel the need to hide away in a corner or find a baby changing room for privacy. I've BF in the middle of Costa, in restaurants, in clothes shops and in a furniture shop, also in GP waiting room and in the back of a taxi as DS was crying and hungry. However, DH thinks BF should be a private thing and thinks I should either feed under a shawl or take a bottle of expressed milk. He said not to be surprised if shop manager asks me to feed elsewhere. My BF support group all say they feed anywhere and are against shawls as they think it makes BF out to be something obscene.
What do others think? Would you be offended by someone BF a small baby without a shawl? Are there places where its inappropriate to BF?

Nice hands ok- big floppy hands hanging out - not ok?

Maybe if you don't want to risk seeing a mother breast feeding her baby you should sit and eat your toasty in the toilet.

Agreed, it is unreasonable to expect men holding hands to modify their behaviour to accommodate one's hangups.

Do you really not see where this is going yet?

It is equally unreasonable to exhort breastfeeding mothers to stop doing it in a way that makes you uncomfortable.

The bottom line is this. Certain activities are both socially acceptable and also legally protected against harassment (which includes being asked to move/stop it/ hide it/ do it under a cover)

Your responsibility is to accept that your hangup is your own unreasonable bigotry, and work on getting over it. Seriously, try that. It's nice on the other side.

There is a time and a place. There is a breast pump. I personally dont advocate feeding in public.

I think most women are usually discrete and prefer to be, society would fare better if they weren't TBH. We need a lot more boob being seen out and about in a non sexual context.

Problem as well is that people have a totally different idea of what discrete is.

It's a private thing between mother and child. It makes others feel awkward and to say otherwise is really rather odd.

pinot - do you never eat in public?

Do your children only eat at home?

pinot go and ask the rest of the world if you think it's odd.

you (and this country) really is in the minority here.

and its because boobs are sexualised for no good reason.

pinot have you read the thread? If you have, has nothing you seen or watched or read led you to maybe have a teeny tiny moment of consideration that your viewpoint is damaging to women?

Some women hate pumping because it's uncomfortable, or their breasts don't respond well to pumping, or because they just don't want to. Your hangups over a woman using her breasts for their natural function to sustain another life should not force a woman to breastfeed solely at home, use a pump, or use a cover.

Really don't understand why this is such a difficult concept.

And I suspect the people driven to stare at a breastfeeding mother are driven to stare because they're trying to get her to see their "offended" glare.

"pinotblush

"It's a private thing between mother and child."

What is - eating?

I have no idea why this would be thought of as the same :)

It's a private thing between mother and child. It makes others feel awkward and to say otherwise is really rather odd.

let''s put what you've said into my men holding hands example

"their relationship is a private thing between man and man. It makes others feel awkward and to say otherwise is really rather odd."

would you ever say that?

What? I mean...what?

pinot I have sat and watched no less than 3 of my friends breastfeed in the last 3 years. I have even helped, with my finger, one of those women break the "seal" that her child's mouth was causing on the nipple when she wanted to disengage. At no point did I feel "odd".

Breastfeeding is not like sex. It doesn't need to be private and speshul. The fact that you equate the two says more about your hangups relating to breasts and their sexuality than it does about breastfeeding.

pinot it must be mortifying for you to eat out in public. Because breastfeeding really is just a child having its dinner. Nothing more, nothing less. What is so private about that? Really, tell me. What is going on between mother and child that requires privacy? Are you of the belief breastfeeding is sexual?

I should clarify, not "watched" in a creepy way, just they were breastfeeding during our conversation ...

I find it awkward and something that should stay private. Id actually like to go to costa coffee, have my coffee and not have to see breasts, but then again that is purely just me.

How can these people read this thread and not be moved even an inch in their viewpoint????

Genuinely baffled.

It makes others feel awkward and to say otherwise is really rather odd

The more it happens in public, the fewer backward thinking people will think it is odd and feel awkward.

It's a very normal thing to do. There's nothing rude or embarrassing about it. There is absolutely no logic to the view that it should be done in private.

It seems to me that the only people who have a problem with women BFing are those who think boobs are primarily about sex. They aren't. Their function is to sustain offspring.

pinot THE BABY'S HEAD IS IN THE WAY.

Sorry for shouting, but jesus. The mother isn't wearing nipple tassels and putting on a show.

Notice how "indiscreet" this woman is being. She is not from the UK.

All those against BF in public - why do you think this woman BFing in public no problem, but to some people in this nation it is seen as "embarrassing" etc. What's the difference between our society and theirs?

Answer: we have as a nation sexualised breasts, and they haven't.

If you don't see how ridiculous you're being i don't know what more to say to help you realise how thick you're being.

Im not mortified by eating in public at all.

Im a bit miffed about breasts out when im trying to eat my meal though.

Im not sure why you are asking me whether its sexual? thats odd.

Tell dp to grow a pair - of boobs - then he can bugger off somewhere private to feed baby. Until then - you feed where, when and as you wish. 25 years ago I nursed both my kids in all sorts of public places, and had very few bad reactions from people - and those who got arsey left without their heads!
Tell him to come into the C21st ffs.

"have no idea why this would be thought of as the same"

I'm lost. Does pinotblush mean she has no idea why breastfeeding would be thought of as feeding?