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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have not let her have the meningitis vaccine?

241 replies

jadorecakesnbiscuits · 19/10/2015 07:53

My daughter is 15 weeks and she goes for her second lot of vaccinations today, with her first lot I was happy for her to have them all apart from the new meningitis because it had only been around for about 4 weeks when she had her first lot and I didn't like how I had to give her calpol as it would cause a spike in her temp, also I just don't trust it.

Now I'm starting to wonder if I was a dick for not letting her have it? I'm not anti vax at all I just don't like this one and what it would do to my baby, has anyone else refused this vaccine? The nurse tried to argue with me and I'm anxious she's going to pressure me again today!

OP posts:

Anotherusername1 · 19/10/2015 08:46

I totally understand why you are nervous about vaccinations but meningitis is a very serious disease. I would weigh up the possible side effects against the disease. It's pretty clear cut in this case I would say - vaccination every time.

And those of you who are trying to guilt-trip the OP are not helping. At all. Vaccination is a personal decision. You're putting chemicals inside a tiny baby and are allowed to feel nervous about it.

Whoknewitcouldbeso · 19/10/2015 08:48

I have no idea how a parent would cope with the guilt of choosing not to vaccinate and their child then contracting the disease it would have prevented. I just couldn't be that sure all the health professionals were wrong. I'd rather be a sheep in this instance and hope to god my children are ok.

AllTheToastIsGone · 19/10/2015 08:49

I think you should definitely get it done. I booked my 3 in privately shortly after it became available then got jittery about it being so new and cancelled.

A few months later I went and discussed it with the private gp who said he had given it to hundreds of children in the short time it had been available and they had had no serious side effects.

I then got my three children vaccinated. One of them had a sore arm for a couple of days and the other was unaffected.

So OP please don't worry that the vaccine is new. Firstly it has been through loads of tests before it was licensed. Secondly it has then been used on loads of kids all over the country whose parents have been paying for it. If there were any issues they would have been widely reported by now.

Good luck your baby will be fine!

Jeffreythegiraffe · 19/10/2015 08:50

Yabvu, sorry. As a nurse I've seen what meningitis can do. Even if you survive it the risk of losing fingers, toes and limbs is huge.

We paid for our dc to have the course, it's not worth the risk. Meningitis is horrific.

Christelle2207 · 19/10/2015 08:52

My baby recently had it and had no fever, a bit grumpy that's all. If you're worried about going on hols you could probably reschedule. Doesn't matter at all if they have a cold on the day, mine did.
I think you would be vvvu to not get her vaccinated. The more babies that have it the less chance of the rest of us getting it. Most babies born before may this year won't get it, the ones that can are very lucky.

TaliZorah · 19/10/2015 08:53

Who in my personal situation, DS nearly died at birth because the healthcare professionals didn't believe me when the week before I'd said he'd stopped moving. I was told the risk of what happened was low and he was unlucky. His birth was extremely traumatic and I'm terrified of something happening to him.

Because he's been the unfortunate 1 who happens to suffer before, I'm worried he'll be the one who suffers the unlikely but devastating reaction.

It's a personal decision

Meandyou150 · 19/10/2015 08:53

Yes you have been ridiculously unreasonable. My son had the jabs ( I paid for them privately because I am so aware how dangerous this disease is and he just missed the cut off)

You say your child WILL get ill, mine didn't - didn't even get a temperature. The high temperature only affects 1 in 10 roughly and the advice to give calpol is only in case of any issues.

Please get your child vaccinated. Men b is the biggest killer in children under 1 in this country

carrotfaery · 19/10/2015 08:54

My DS has just finished having his vaccinations (until he's 5) he had a temperature with all of them, but it was usually mild (less than 38.5), lasted less than 24 hours and it actually didn't make him too miserable. It's a natural side effect to most vaccines as fever is part of their defence mechanism, so please don't worry too much if she does have a spike in temperature.

bumbleymummy · 19/10/2015 08:54

Of course it is Tali. I don't think anyone should be bullied or guilt tripped into something we don't feel comfortable with. We're all just doing our best.

maybebabybee · 19/10/2015 08:55

the thought of it making my daughter poorly scared me.

And you don't find the thought of her having meningitis scary?

bizarre .

WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 19/10/2015 08:56

It doesn't definitely cause a spike in temperature. It will cause a spike in temp in about 50% of cases. DD is 14 weeks and has had hers, she was completely fine.

Baaaaaaaaaaaa · 19/10/2015 09:03

Will you all please stop berating the woman.

She's come here asking for advice, which some of you have very kindly given in a non-judgemental way, but a lot of you just seem to want to make her feel dreadful about being scared.

And she is scared.

Do you really think she'd put her child's life in danger for the hell of it? She needs reassuring and comforting, not to be harangued and made to feel bad.

So when you're all in a scared and lonely place you won't be expecting any help, support or kind words, will you?

outputgap · 19/10/2015 09:03

There isn't a 10 year history of this vaccine, though, is there? It was only approved for use in the last two years iirc.

Nevertheless, I am planning to spend a fortune getting my two vaccinated, starting at half term, lucky them! And I have a baby on the way who will get it for free.

I think the regular baby vacs can also raise temperature. My gp recommends calpol for those too.

I have read the research by those who developed the vaccine, and I'm happy for mine to have it. If I wasn't pregnant, I think I'd have the men w vaccine myself at the same time.

I am not by any means unsceptical about vaccines. Mine didn't have rotovirus as I read that breastfeeding provided the same level of protection. Mine have had single vaccine measles and rubella. But the costs and benefits here seem pretty overwhelming.

noeffingidea · 19/10/2015 09:12

jadorecakes you say some of your friends haven't vaccinated your children. That's all the more reason to have it done, because your daughter is already at increased risk. Every unvaccinated person you come into contact will increase the risk.
I'm a former nurse , and my children were given every single vaccination they were offered. I consider myself very lucky to have been given that choice.

BitOutOfPractice · 19/10/2015 09:15

My understanding is that is is a long history of this vaccne - just not in the UK and that we are behind the times. My Dutch relatives' babies have been given it for years

mintbiscuit · 19/10/2015 09:21

Like some posters on here my dd didn't suffer a rise in temp at all.

ChewyGiraffe · 19/10/2015 09:21

As others have already said, the meningitis vaccine has been available privately for quite a long while now, its just new to the NHS. I think it was originally due to be introduced on the NHS around the time that my DD (now 27 months) was born, but (as far as I understand it) the delay has just been down to endless negotiations between the manufacturer and the NHS as to how much the NHS should pay per dose.

Again as pp have said, its an awful disease. Although I think that - thankfully - its a relatively rare illness, I still caught meningococcal meningitis (menB) myself when I was 8 years old. I became very ill within hours and after a couple of weeks in hospital (much of it in intensive care) I was very, very lucky indeed to survive with all my limbs, hearing and brain function intact. All credit to my mum for persevering when 2 emergency GP's had initially told her I had (a) mumps, (b) german measles.

So I've decided to pay privately for the vaccine for my toddler. (I did ask whether she could have it on the NHS and was told not.)

I'm not medical - so please check with your HCP - but as far as I know there's no reason to put off vaccinating your baby if she just has a cold. The patient leaflet says this:
"As with other vaccines, administration of Bexsero should be postponed in subjects suffering from an acute severe febrile illness. However, the presence of a minor infection, such as cold, should not result in the deferral of vaccination".

If you haven't found it already, here's the link to the vaccine website: www.bexsero.co.uk/. Someone's already linked the 'meningitis now' website (which has the best info, probably) linked again here

Fugghetaboutit · 19/10/2015 09:22

I think the temperature argument is odd.

Lots of children get temps from vaccines that have been around for years; my ds did with the 5 in 1 so I gave him Calpol.

bumbleymummy · 19/10/2015 09:22

Bexsero was licensed in Europe in 2013.

tinytumble · 19/10/2015 09:31

I've never posted on AIBU before - but I'm afraid I think YWBVU.
DS2 caught viral meningitis at 4 weeks. At first they thought it was bacterial, so he was on broad spectrum antibiotics and full-on monitoring, drip etc for 7 days. He's ok now but it was by far the worst experience of my parenting life so far. And awful for him, he was so tiny.
My now 22-week DD was one of the first in the country to receive the vaccine on the NHS. Like you I did feel apprehensive but I felt on balance the risk of meningitis was much more significant. As it happened she had no temperature spike (even when the prophylactic calpol wore off between doses). The spike is apparently not linked to the meningitis vaccine per se but is more likely to occur when it is administered with the other scheduled vaccines - so it is an immune response rather than a side effect of the vaccine itself IYSWIM.
DD has had both scheduled doses, was well both times and thriving now.

Fugghetaboutit · 19/10/2015 09:33

Tiny don't they give the vaccine at 8 weeks though, so you couldn't have prevented your ds from it anyway. Hope he's ok now, sounds scary.

Catsgowoof · 19/10/2015 09:36

before anyone attacks i'm vaccinating anyway. but i am really uncomfortable with the calpol. ebf, virgin gut, squirt the baby full of strawberry flavoured crap... anyone gone without it/have words of comfort?

Fugghetaboutit · 19/10/2015 09:39

I personally would wait to see if they get a temp then deal with it.

Can I ask Cat what will you do when your child has a temp/in pain from a bug/teething? Not give painkiller?

bumbleymummy · 19/10/2015 09:39

Cats, we don't give calpol. We use disprol instead. It's suitable from 3 months. Maybe an alternative for you?

Artandco · 19/10/2015 09:39

It's not a new vaccine, it's just new that it's free for a certain age group. I paid for mine for have it over 2 years ago.

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