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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have not let her have the meningitis vaccine?

241 replies

jadorecakesnbiscuits · 19/10/2015 07:53

My daughter is 15 weeks and she goes for her second lot of vaccinations today, with her first lot I was happy for her to have them all apart from the new meningitis because it had only been around for about 4 weeks when she had her first lot and I didn't like how I had to give her calpol as it would cause a spike in her temp, also I just don't trust it.

Now I'm starting to wonder if I was a dick for not letting her have it? I'm not anti vax at all I just don't like this one and what it would do to my baby, has anyone else refused this vaccine? The nurse tried to argue with me and I'm anxious she's going to pressure me again today!

OP posts:
Fugghetaboutit · 19/10/2015 08:13

If my toddler hasn't had it but I plan to give it to my new baby (coming January) should I get my toddler done too?
My friend's son died from this aged 22 months old.

aprilanne · 19/10/2015 08:14

after 4 months i dont think they give the vacine so its today or not at all .it was nearly 19 years ago my son was ill but believe me you dont want to take the risk .

chairmeoh · 19/10/2015 08:14

Having the vaccine might make your baby feel poorly, and she might need calpol. But she'll be fine the next day.
Risking meningitis is in a whole other league. Listen to advice. Read up on expert opinion. Think about the long term advantage your baby is being offered.
Don't feel bullied by the nurse, but explain your feelings and tell him/her you're researching further to reach a decision.
How does the child's father feel about this?

bumbleymummy · 19/10/2015 08:15

I think a few people are having this one separately because of the advice to give paracetamol prophylactically (which is different to the advice for the other vaccines). I'm sure if you chat to the nurse/doctor about it you could reschedule it to have it on its own. Tbh I was surprised that they weren't doing that anyway.

I think it's normal to be concerned about new vaccines on the schedule. Don't beat yourself up.

chairmeoh · 19/10/2015 08:17

Hey! Don't feel like a cunt! You're being a protective mother. But please have it done today, the benefits far outweigh the potential short-term poorly baby.

Original poster
jadorecakesnbiscuits · 19/10/2015 08:17

My husband felt the same! He didn't know either but now I feel so so stupid! Just being isolated as a parent and not knowing where to turn for advice! Trustworthy advice anyway. I have a few friends that haven't vaccinated their children at all and I think they are nuts, now I've become one of those nuts!

OP posts:
Sirzy · 19/10/2015 08:18

I think it's normal to be concerned, but I think of all the things that are vaccinated against this is probably one of the most important ones as it is such a dangerous disease and still fairly common.

Whoknewitcouldbeso · 19/10/2015 08:19

Fugg I'm in exactly the same position. Three year old who didn't have the vaccine as a baby. Baby no.2 due February who will be having the vaccine. Just doesn't sit right with me.

My plan is to get three year old through the Winter and free from colds etc and then pay for the vaccine.

Salene · 19/10/2015 08:21

It's not only been around for 4 weeks , it's been being administered on the continent for 10 years, the U.K. Are just very behind the times

Remember men B is the biggest killer in under 5's.

Sallystyle · 19/10/2015 08:21

Please get her the vax.

A high temp is a walk in the park compared to meningitis. Mine got a high temp after all their injections and it just isn't a big deal to give calpol. It's so much better than the alternative.

I think you have to think about how you would feel should she get meningitis. Is it something you could live with knowing you may have been able to prevent it but didn't? It can be a devastating illness which just doesn't compare to a high temp.

Talk to the nurse again about your fears but definitely get it done as I feel we have a responsibility to our children to help protect them from these illnesses where we can and failing to protect them due to a possibility of a high temp is always something you will regret should she unfortunately ever get meningitis.

HeighHoghItsBacktoWorkIGo · 19/10/2015 08:21

Your GP is trustworthy advice. She should have the vaccine for her own protection and well being. Sometimes babies grizzle when they get vaccinated. That's normal and not really a big deal in the greater scheme of things.

Original poster
jadorecakesnbiscuits · 19/10/2015 08:22

Should I pay for it for my 2 year old? Can my daughter still have it if she's a bit stuffy in the nose? Maybe I should be asking the nurse this but when I asked her about rotavirus (sp?) she just gave me the pamphlet from the packaging to read rather than telling me there and then before giving it my daughter.

OP posts:
Sallystyle · 19/10/2015 08:22

OP you posted as I was typing.

Good for you for changing your mind Thanks

Picklesauage · 19/10/2015 08:23

My DD is 18 weeks now and has had both of her doses of this vaccine. The first dose I gave her two doses of calpol, they recommend threw, but she was asleep for the third one and as she was fine I didn't wake her. It didn't bother her at all, or at least no more so than the other vaccinations.

The second lot bothered her a little more, although she did have a cold at the time too. She had a very low grade temperature which calpol sorted and after a grizzly day or 2 she was fine. I'm so happy to know she is at least a little better protected now.

All in all it was worth it.

Salene · 19/10/2015 08:24

I paid to get my son this jab privately, I know of 1 person who nearly died at 14 from men b and 1 guy who did die age 21 at uni from men b

It's a horrible horrible thing and all kids should get I think not just babies, which is why we paid to get our son done

NiNoKuni · 19/10/2015 08:24

If it helps you any, DS had his a few weeks ago, I gave him a shot of Calpol and he was absolutely fine. I don't think the temp spike is guaranteed at all.

WutheringTights · 19/10/2015 08:26

We paid for our two, DD only just missed it, DS was 2.5. Cost £750 all in. DS only needed two doses. DD had two but needs a booster after her MMR because she was under one. Worth every penny. We paid for vaccinations against Chicken Pox too.

WutheringTights · 19/10/2015 08:27

Oh and we didn't give calpol or anything and they were both absolutely fine.

Fugghetaboutit · 19/10/2015 08:27

I think I'll pay for my toddler to get it too. He's at nursery now and it worries me after what happened to my friends son.

ohtheholidays · 19/10/2015 08:29

All I can tell you is this OP,my poor Mum lost her big sister when she was only little(my Mum)her sister was only 18 and this was years ago so there were no vacanations sadly.My Auntie(I was told)was one of those rare people who loved everybody and everybody loved her,the whole of the area they lived in went into mourning for a year after she'd passed and my poor Nan and Grandad,my Mum and my Uncles never got over loosing her.

Then about 5 years ago my cousins wife had caught meningitis and we nearly lost her and she's such a lovely and amazing person and also on my Mum's side so my poor Uncle had already lost his lovely big sister and had to face nearly loosing his poor DIL and my Mum her niece and my uncle his niece.

It is such an evil illness many children even if they make it through are left with brain damage or loose limbs because of the meningitis.I think it's worth protecting our children against it I really do.

TaliZorah · 19/10/2015 08:30

YANBU. DS isn't having it either. I'm not anti vax but I don't want him to be one of the first to have it. I like my vaccines to have been out for several years first. DS also has allergies and I'm worried he'll react.

Of course you won't get any support on here. My own view is to do your own research and come to your own conclusion. OP I don't think YABU

megandmogatthezoo · 19/10/2015 08:30

You are very lucky to have this available on the NHS. Both my children missed out so I have paid for them - 3 vaccines each at £150 a time. That's £900. That's how important it is to me to have them vaccinated. I know two children who have contracted menB, one at 6 months and one at 18. It is a terrifying awful disease.

Sparrowlegs248 · 19/10/2015 08:34

OP my DS had it at his first lot of Vaccs. The advice is Calpol as soon as hour get home and a further two doses. DS was a bit grizzly and slept a bit more then usual. That was it.

Alfieisnoisy · 19/10/2015 08:42

Tali, did you miss the 10 year history of it?

You needn't have it for your child but good luck dealing with your guilt if your child dies from an entirely preventable form of meningitis.

OP, there are several different strains of bacteria which cause meningitis. The vaccines protect against a couple of them. Men C etc but not the strains against which vaccines don't yet exist.

TaliZorah · 19/10/2015 08:44

Alfie as far as I'm aware it hasn't been used routinely before, therefore if there's a pattern of reactions it won't show as much as it hasn't been in such a large scale.

I'm not anti vaccine at all I just don't feel comfortable giving DS a new vaccine. I didn't accept the cervical cancer jab either as I was in the first intake of that, for the same reason.

I don't think it's unreasonable. I'm not trying to argue about it just offering OP a different perspective

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