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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wince at the C word on MN

309 replies

Yarboosucks · 06/10/2015 18:43

I am certainly no prude and have not lived a sheltered life…. But I am amazed at the use of the c-word on here. I just don't get the apparent acceptance to use a reference to female genitalia as an insult. Do people use that word in RL or is it just here?

OP posts:
Original poster
Yarboosucks · 06/10/2015 19:12

I am not Canadian, I am a Brit but have spent decades living overseas. If I am honest, then I can be reading a post by someone and they are speaking complete sense, offering sound advice, then they use that word and I move on.

I am willing to accept that it is probably my problem - although I see that I am not alone. But I cannot see how using a word that refers to such a glorious thing as a vagina as the ultimate insult is a good thing.

OP posts:
HackerFucker22 · 06/10/2015 19:13

Another cunt person here.

It's a very strong word so I don't use it often but when it's required I don't shy away from it.

BrandNewAndImproved · 06/10/2015 19:13

Andylion maybe the ones you've been around but mines pretty awesome.

Cunt is a great descriptive word like fuck. I like strong words.

ImperialBlether · 06/10/2015 19:14

Yes, I would move away! It's one of those things that I would judge someone on immediately.

For those who use it frequently - do you stop yourself from using it in particular situations? In front of your mum? Your child's teacher? If you were being interviewed on TV? In front of children?

PushAPushPop · 06/10/2015 19:15

Prefer "twat" myself.

Although "cunt" doesn't offend me. Grin

Ooh I also love the word "bollocks". Some words just roll of the tongue nicer than othersWink

laughingatweather · 06/10/2015 19:15

I have no objection to the word and use it myself. So it's not the word I object to but I think it's often used with no real reason on here but perhaps not any more than other offensive terms.

I'm thinking about threads with no suggestion of abuse or DV but may be something like 'DP commented on the house being untidy as I'm a SAHM and he thinks I have enough time but I'm finding it hard because have a high needs baby' or whatever.

And obviously that's a hurtful thing to say and it shouldn't happen. And a new Mum would feel really upset and criticised for that.

But you can guarantee they'll be responses saying ' he sounds like a cunt' or 'is he always a twat? I'd tell him to fuck off'.

And he might be a twat. Or he might be a nice bloke with no idea of how much the OP does all day. Or his Mum had 10 children and always had a spotless house so he grew up with different expectations
Or he may have an ASC or OCD so an untidy house freaks him out. Or he may have just had a shit day and was tired and took it out on the OP whereas he's normally loving and supportive. There could be a hundred reasons.

But some posters seem to fall over themselves to come in with the sweariest response. There's a difference between someone saying 'he's a cunt because. .
' and offering a reason or advice but it's often a one liner.

jorahmormont · 06/10/2015 19:17

I use it in real life as well as on here.

I don't believe in being afraid of using words. It's all about context and situations. There are only a few situations where using cunt is reasonable and acceptable, but those situations exist. Much better to use it in moderation than to outright forbid it.

Sparklingbrook · 06/10/2015 19:17

I wouldn't say or use it myself but have no objection to others doing it. As long as they are not my DC.

multivac · 06/10/2015 19:17

"AIBU to be pissed off about this woman who gave me a funny look in the supermarket when my toddler had a tantrum?"

"YANBU. She's a cunt."

"AIBU to be terrified at the prospect of George Osborne becoming prime minister?"

"YANBU. He's a cunt. His cuntiness is chilling. We should all be scared."

donajimena · 06/10/2015 19:18

When my ex was sending me abusive messages he seemed to like calling me a cunt rather a lot. I'd like us all to use the word liberally so that it becomes as benign as 'dick' 'knob' and 'bellend' . That way idiots like him will be scratching their heads at what else they can insult us with.
'You devious bellend' just doesn't have the same tone does it?
Keep on cunting on

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 06/10/2015 19:18

I cant use it at work. I cant use it around my kids. So using it in leisure time is the ideal compromise.

atticusclaw2 · 06/10/2015 19:22

It might be an age thing. I'm in my early 40s and it still surprises me to see how often it is used on MN. I have never and would never use the word and I swear a lot.

I don't think I've heard it used in RL more than a handful of times and only then by pissed up blokes falling over in the street.

When I read it on here I always think people are using it just for effect and that they probably don't use it in RL either.

mileend2bermondsey · 06/10/2015 19:22

Yes, I would move away!
In case of what??!

For those who use it frequently - do you stop yourself from using it in particular situations
Yes, we are normal human beings with a brain cell or two. Despite your thinking.

You sound like a bit of a cunt TBH

VulcanWoman · 06/10/2015 19:22

I agree, I don't like it either, if someone in RL swore all the time I'd say away from them if possible and think less off them.

SurlyCue · 06/10/2015 19:23

A bit childish don't you think?

And the award for missing the point goes to......

DoJo · 06/10/2015 19:23

But I cannot see how using a word that refers to such a glorious thing as a vagina as the ultimate insult is a good thing.

Because it is only the 'ultimate insult' if people like you shy away from using it as a normal, everyday word in a variety of contexts. Dick is only insulting if you are using it as an insult - it can also be a descriptive term, an erotic term (for those who find it so) and a fairly innocuous term. Why should cunt be any different?

If I am honest, then I can be reading a post by someone and they are speaking complete sense, offering sound advice, then they use that word and I move on.

By reacting like that, you are giving a simple word power that it shouldn't warrant and colluding with the idea that using it somehow demeans the person who has said it. Why would their opinion or advice be any less valid simply because they have used the word cunt?

EponasWildDaughter · 06/10/2015 19:23

I never say it and i don't like to hear it.

mileend2bermondsey · 06/10/2015 19:23

m.youtube.com/watch?v=R0OrViE-Oyc

scaevola · 06/10/2015 19:23

"Some words just roll of the tongue nicer than others"

There was a whole Two Ronnies Sketch about this, dividing words into woody and tinny.

Nearly all swearing is woody.

Doublebubblebubble · 06/10/2015 19:24
cariadlet · 06/10/2015 19:24

I hate it, and don't like the swearing in here generally (I don't care who calls me a snob or a prude).

In RL I swear, and use most words apart from that one. But, I generally only swear if the circumstances demand swearing (eg I'm really angry about something), and I wouldn't use it so casually that every other word is a swear word - I grew out of doing that in my teens.

I also don't swear at people (I think that just brings you down to their level and reduces the power of your argument) and I'm careful who I swear in front of. I would never swear in front of my dd or my parents, or many of my colleagues. But I'd happily swear in front of most of my friends and some of my colleagues.

I think that the casual use of swearing by some people (both here and in RL) greatly reduces the power of those words and suggests a limited vocabulary. It also indicates a lack of respect for others - I don't swear in front of children, nor do I swear in front of anyone who might be offended by it.
Comments about not caring about what other people think are pretty shallow and self-centred. It only takes a little consideration to be aware that words can upset others.

Go ahead, flame me. I don't care if anyone thinks it's an uptight, snobby stance.

Dawndonnaagain · 06/10/2015 19:25

For those who use it frequently - do you stop yourself from using it in particular situations? In front of your mum? Your child's teacher? If you were being interviewed on TV? In front of children?
I find this ridiculous. I use Cunt, don't have a problem with swear words at all. Do you use any swear words? Would you use them in front of a teacher? Children? I think you'll find in most cases the same applies.
I haven't answered the mum one because she, in my case, is an abusive cunt with whom I have had no contact for a few really rather fabulous years.

Pasithea · 06/10/2015 19:25

Worst most offensive word ever.

Babbafish · 06/10/2015 19:25

I'm from Liverpool but live in Suffolk. Down here you can say Twat .... Like its normal everyday language ....
I don't like cunt ... My mum used to say " at least a cunt is useful!"

Twat, fanny, cock & cunt!!! My least favourite ... I don't use them... Don't really swear that much .... I preferred knobhead !!!!!

Would never ..... Up in till today .... Consider using the c word on a public forum ....

Doublebubblebubble · 06/10/2015 19:26

Here's another one

I love Stephen Fry