To be tired of DP constantly stalling in regards to us protecting my rights?

[MrsRonniePickering]

Basically for two years now we've been going back and forth on the issue of us going to a solicitor to have our house (currently in his name only despite us both paying the mortgage) put into a tenants in common agreement to protect the money that I put in and to protect my rights overall. In all that time he's vonstantly tried to talk me out of it but I eventually put my foot down and we went to solicitor today. He reckons he totally agrees with me that my rights should be protected and said he'd use the solicitor he's always used as she's the dogs bollocks basically and knows everything. We went and she's lovely, I instantly liked her and trusted that she knew what she was doing. DP continuoudly agreed with Her, nodded his head and laughed along to her jokes ... Yet when we came out he decided he didn't agree with her, thought she'd got some legal stuff wrong and he'd need to "read up more" on the Internet with regards to how to split shares on houses. She also suggested we make an appointment with our current mortgage provider in regards to remortgaging. He is now saying it's best if he "looks around" so again he's going against her advise.
Imo this now just comes across as more stalling. Also, why do I get no say in whether we make appointments or not?? Why is it all on his terms???

The solicitor suggested a 55/45% split in his favour. He's unhappy as he thinks that's unfair to him. He did put a lot more into the deposit than I did but I have been paying 50/50 since then and will always do so. So beating this in mind she suggested it would be unfair to have me stuck on a tiny % especially considering we are getting married and I'm normal circumstances would accumulate a bigger share through marriage anyway. Hence the 45/55. I think he feels badly done to. This is why, imo he's stalling again.

It appears neither of you trusts the other financially. I can't see how a relationship can have any future in those circumstances.

I'd run. He sounds awful.

When I bought my first flat with my then DF (now DH) he put in a larger deposit than i but we paid equal 50/50 split of the mortgage. We had put in writing if we were to split up and sell then we take out the money that we put in and then of the remaining we would split the profit of the sale 50/50 so it was totally and utterly fair.

The moment we married this was scrapped and we now own 50/50.

He's been dragging his feet for two years, op . He's not going to put your name on the deeds, ever, because he doesn't want to.
How many more years will it take for realisation to dawn?

I put in all of the deposit for our house and DP and I have a joint mortgage. The legals are such that my deposit is recognised as having been put in by me so I own more of the house. I think that's fair.

As you're no doubt aware, many couples (married or not) will be joint tenants which means effectively that you both own the whole of the asset so if one of you died for example, the other would automatically take ownership of the full asset. Tenants in common is a good way of having separate stakes in the asset - this might be for various reasons - for example, your situation where one person has invested a higher % and you agree to unequal shares but also often in 2nd marriages where there are children from 1st marriages to consider when it comes to inheritance etc. With TICs, the other partner has no automatic stake in the other person's part of the asset (ie they have no "equitable interest" in it). One thing to bear in mind in your situation however is that, even though the property is not in your name, a court would probably find that you had an "equitable interest" in it in the form of an implied trust because you have contributed to the deposit and are sharing the mortgage payments.

Putting all the legal stuff aside however, I wouldn't let him fob you off any longer - why should you be paying the mortgage off on an asset that isn't yours? He sounds like he has little intention of doing the right thing morally - why not stop paying the mortgage until he does?

Do you have a date booked for the wedding in six months? It seems strange to me to do this now when you are about to get half the house regardless of who is on the deeds. The point is in 6 months, all your assets will become 50/50 anyway. Why not save the money on changing titles on deeds and remortgage fees and just wait six months when you will legally be entitled to half of everything? Are you worried this wedding isn't set in stone?

Stop paying any if the mortgage, if it's his mortgage he is responsible for it. then dump him.

A little different as me and DH are married but last year we bought a house using my inheritence as a deposit. DH had a small amount from a much smaller inheritence and the equity from our previous property had been from me as well. Altogether I put in nearly 100k including fees and doing up this house. DH pays the mortgage as I don't work. I toyed with the idea of having it as tenants in common with me getting a bigger percentage if we split because even with DH paying the mortgage it won't come close to what I have put in but as he is my equal partner and I trust and respect him, we didn't and we are joint tenants. I would expect this of anyone who is serious about a partner. He just doesn't seem to see you as a partner sadly.

I note the OP hasn't been back to confirm that there is any actual show of commitment to the marriage date so far.

Which is actually a good thing as he doesn't sound like a good husband choice!

Yeah I don't think the op is returning.