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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

about my son's lunchbox

109 replies

Bogeybrains · 22/09/2015 21:00

Sorry for what is probably a boring topic to many but would like opinions on this. Since he has gone back to school, my previously picky eating 7 year old has transformed. The school are rewarding the children with stickers and rewards if they finish everything in their lunchbox. DS now insists on eating every single crumb as opposed to hardly eating anything.He is looking so much healthier. However, DS is coming home upset and cross because he is missing playtime with his friends because he spends his entire lunch break in the hall. Surely this is not normal. I'm wondering if I am giving him too much but I don't think I am. He normally has a tuna and cucumber sandwich on 2 slices of bread, cheese stick, yoghurt, piece of fruit and a flapjack/cake. Is this a normal amount for a 7 year old or am I overfeeding the poor thing making him miss playtime?

OP posts:
PosterEh · 22/09/2015 21:03

I think it does seem quite a lot. Why don't you drop the cake/flapjack whilst he's eating so well generally and see if he complains he's hungry. Or give him yogurt OR cheese.

badgergirl82 · 22/09/2015 21:04

It sounds fine to me? I could probably demolish it in five minutes though! :)

cuntycowfacemonkey · 22/09/2015 21:04

I'd drop the flapjack/cake or just make a sandwich with one slice of bread if he's struggling to eat it all. I don't like the idea of children being rewarded for eating everything as it means they may be eating more than they actually want to.

Bambambini · 22/09/2015 21:04

Sounds a good mix but I think it's probably too much, especially if he thinks he has to eat it all. I wouldn't normally eat anywhere near that for lunch unless I'm out in a restaurant etc. My son usually eats one slice of bread and butter (leaves the other slice most days) , a small cookie/tea cake, and his cucumber and peppers. He always leaves his apple to after school.

Bambambini · 22/09/2015 21:06

Oh, and my son is 10 so a good bit older.

Sighing · 22/09/2015 21:06

That's a lot of food for lunch compared to my 7 year old daughter. She eats a sandwich half that size. Fruit, veg sticks and cheese.

CrapBag · 22/09/2015 21:06

When my 7 year old DS is at home he will eat loads for lunch. At school though he eats much less as I know he wants to get out and play so we do out less in. He takes cheese/jam sandwich (2 pieces of bread), a small pot of strawberries and grapes and a cereal bar. Now he has started having a frube and a baby bel instead of the cereal bar but he does finish it all and still has time to play. At home he will eat much more than that.

If he wants less because he wants to play then let him. I don't agree with this reward system that makes them finish their lunch. A child should know when they are full and not feel pressured. I only make mine eat when I know they have eaten their favourite bit then developed a sudden tummy ache when it's got to the bit they don't really want.

Artandco · 22/09/2015 21:07

Seems a lot. My almost 6 year old would still only eat half a sandwich, ie one piece Of bread.

Give him sandwich as usual. Plus piece of fruit. Then yogurt or cheese, not both. Give 1/2 the size piece of flapjack so it's just a tiny 'desert'.

Leeds2 · 22/09/2015 21:10

I don't think that is an awful lot, tbh.

But, it is great that your DS is eating more and would want to encourage that. I would probably drop the cheese or yogurt and see if that makes a difference to the amount of playtime he gets, because I wouldn't want to discourage him.. If he complains of being hungry, you can add it back.

I also strongly believe that (most) kids need lots of fresh air and running around.

MrsPnut · 22/09/2015 21:16

I give half a sandwich, a tube yoghurt, a little cheese, a couple of mini sausages or pieces of chicken and a fruit roll thing. Dd is 9 but is the fussiest eater.

TeamBacon · 22/09/2015 21:19

Drop it to one slice of bread and ditch the cake for now. If he's been picky for a while he might just be used to eating slowly. He might speed up and you can add more back in if needed.

RedSoloCup · 22/09/2015 21:20

I do five things inc fruit snack, so sandwich, two bit of fruit, yogurt / frube / cheese snack and then a little cake type treat. One bit of fruit is eaten at morning break leaving four things for lunch.

Ragwort · 22/09/2015 21:21

Sounds like a lot - my 14 year old only has one sandwich (2 pieces of bread) and a banana.

AwfulBeryl · 22/09/2015 21:24

Maybe the 2 slices sandwich is too much with a cake / flapjack too.

Is he just a very slow eater ? Does he take his time at home ?

Bambambini · 22/09/2015 21:27

Do the adults posting eat all that for lunch? I would normally just have a 2 slice sandwich or toast and poached eggs or a bowl of soup and some bread etc. I think folk are giving their kids (especially 7 yrs old) a lot of food.

Haroldplaystheharmonica · 22/09/2015 21:30

I don't think it's too much. My two are slowish eaters but I give them a sandwich (2 slices although with the crusts off so probably 3/4 of a sandwich) cucumber, frube and choccy biscuit.

Wolfiefan · 22/09/2015 21:30

My 12 year old DS doesn't have that much.

Thefuckinggrinch · 22/09/2015 21:32

I do 1 sandwich (2 pieces bread) a frube or small piece of fruit then a small cake type thing (stuff like the little packs of cookies or small flapjacks)

wankerchief · 22/09/2015 21:36

1 slice of bread sandwich
Small stick of cheese or frube
Small Tub of fruit/veg (today's was 5 cherry tomatoes and a few grapes)

My kids are 13 and 4.
Eldest will usually buy a cake/cookie in the canteen at break too.

I hate the finish everything brigade, such an unhealthy message

Thefuckinggrinch · 22/09/2015 21:37

I do a 2 bread sandwich a frube a piece of fruit and a small treat. They usually eat the frube or fruit at break. They dont always eat it all.

Bogeybrains · 22/09/2015 21:37

Thank you everyone for your replies. Yes, he is a slow eater. Am quite grateful of the school's new reward system tbh as my DS literally would have a nibble of his lunch before and come home feeling sick because he was so hungry. He has gained weight in the last 3 weeks and he looks so much better. Am going to cut it down tomorrow though. Do you think it is best I halve the sandwich or remove another item. He has asked me not to send the fruit but I can't remove that can I?

OP posts:
defineme · 22/09/2015 21:42

It is a difficult question because you have no idea what other posters saying that's a lot give their kids over the rest of the day. My ds2 would have eaten that and an extra sandwich, but his twin sister wouldn't finish it, yet ds2 is thinner than his sister-genetics, appetite, activity etc all come into play.
The important thing is he is struggling so can he eat the flapjack at first break or have it after school?
The NHS says a 7 year old boy needs 1650 calories a day.

interestingly 13 year olds need 2600 and 18 year olds need over 3000, so those of you with teens having less than the 7 year old for lunch must be giving them massive dinners!

WorraLiberty · 22/09/2015 21:43

Sandwich, 1 piece of fruit and a drink is all they need to keep them going until home time.

CalleighDoodle · 22/09/2015 21:44

Drop the cake.
Cheese or yoghurt, rather than both.

LynetteScavo · 22/09/2015 21:45

I would halve the sandwich and remove the cheese stick or yogurt.