about my son's lunchbox

[Bogeybrains]

Sorry for what is probably a boring topic to many but would like opinions on this. Since he has gone back to school, my previously picky eating 7 year old has transformed. The school are rewarding the children with stickers and rewards if they finish everything in their lunchbox. DS now insists on eating every single crumb as opposed to hardly eating anything.He is looking so much healthier. However, DS is coming home upset and cross because he is missing playtime with his friends because he spends his entire lunch break in the hall. Surely this is not normal. I'm wondering if I am giving him too much but I don't think I am. He normally has a tuna and cucumber sandwich on 2 slices of bread, cheese stick, yoghurt, piece of fruit and a flapjack/cake. Is this a normal amount for a 7 year old or am I overfeeding the poor thing making him miss playtime?

I would cut the crusts off

DamnBamboo fair enough, we'll have to agree to disagree.

But to get back to the OP's child, he's asking for less food so he clearly doesn't need much more than a light midday lunch, like many healthy children.

And with regards to my opinion being confused with 'fact'.

The fact is that all kids are different and many, many kids will be perfectly happy with a sandwich made from two pieces of bread, a piece of fruit and a drink...having already eaten a breakfast and who will be eating again after 3pm.

Yes some kids will have a bigger appetite than that of course, but plenty will also be fine, just as many adults would with that lunch.

I agree worra that it is generally best to allow a child to self-regulate food intake.

The amount of food I have put in over the years has changed in accordance with needs and I am alarmed quite frankly at how much my older kids eat.

My son is 10 but wears 13-14 clothes and my god - he has hollow legs.

Not an ounce of wasted fat on him but after a decent sized breakfast, he asks for a snack for morning break. All of them prefer packed lunches because of the quality (other story entirely) but also the quantity. I also pack an after school snack because they attend ASC and the snack they give is quite small.

Their requirements go up and down and they wont eat the same every day, but to avoid a ravenous raid on the fridge at home-time, decent sized meals snack are helpful. I'd rather a little was left-over in the lunch box than them feel hungry. Eating food because it's there though, is simply wrong.

The fact is that all kids are different and many, many kids will be perfectly happy with a sandwich made from two pieces of bread, a piece of fruit and a drink...having already eaten a breakfast and who will be eating again after 3pm

But you don't know the OPs kid do you - so it is misguided 'advice'.
You can be wrong sometimes you know!!!

And many, many kids wont' be either!

And as someone who is clincally qualified and who works in this area, you really are arguing with the wrong person. Lets just leave it at that shall we.

That also rather assumes they'll be eating again very soon after 3pm, which may not be the case especially if they're at afterschool clubs or similar.

Also, he's not actually asking for less food, he's saying that it takes him too long to eat it all. Given that, and that OP is pleased his appetite has improved, I'd drop one item only. Would be probably the cheese or cake. I don't have the carb hatred sandwich suspicion many do on MN. I'd leave that alone. Or ask him what he eats last and see if that's helpful?

Am LOL at the use of 'many many' !

I don't think I know any kids who would just have a sandwich and fruit and it be enough either. Fair enough mine don't get tea till half five but after whatever they eat for their tuck at their morning break, sandwich juice crisps and yoghurt for lunch they're in the door at 5 past three and in the cupboards or fridge for more till tea time. Mine are all really active and out all the time but I can't see it making a huge amount of difference

My 7yo would eat more than that at lunchtime, given long enough. However, he'd far, far rather sprint off to play football, and was heard this week advising his little brother (in Reception) not to bother taking pudding at school dinners because it eats into your playtime too much

Are you allowed to send in snack for playtime? Perhaps he could have the flapjack at 10.30 and the cheese when you pick him up, or similar.

If it's a pot yogurt they are slow to eat for the amount they fill you up. You don't need double dairy. Cheese or yogurt and look at the wrapping to see if he might be losing time there.

I'd look at increasing the calories in each item and reducing stuff that's slow to eat compared with how much energy it gives. For example, butter the bread as well as putting mayonnaise in the tuna; or give a tube yogurt he can quickly slurp instead of a pot that needs faffing with; a slice of malt loaf is eaten in two bites but a flapjack or cereal bar takes longer - and spread the malt loaf with butter or cream cheese.

These are tricks I've tried with my "but I want to go out and plaaaaaaaay" PFB who is now seven.

FWIW I think rewarding children for finishing every bite is really bad practice. Rewarding them for paying attention to their food and eating a balanced meal, maybe. Obsession with clearing plates is why children of the Eighties can't leave food as adults. Stopping eating when you're full is healthy and should be encouraged. I wish children had long enough to be able to assess whether they're full or just finished.

Is the cheese stick of the stringy variety? If so it takes my DD ages to eat hers, tiny string by tiny string. I think the amount of food looks ok, but would take him a while to get through. I agree with the others and ditch the cake/flapjack and just leave the yoghurt. A tubey yoghurt would be quicker to eat too. An apple takes ages to chomp through especially with wobbly teeth, maybe grapes?

Just try different things and see how you get on. It's fine to give him fruit for breakfast or after school instead. Or just a very small amount. I think it's important to listen to his opinions and reach a compromise.

Bake dried fruit into the flapjack. Job done.

Miss out a different thing each day to give him variety. He can look forward to the no fruit day if he wants.

I agree on the idea of compromise. He can eat fruit at another time (or not at all, if he likes veggies).

Have you asked him what he would like? I think just a couple of items are fine, as children get out of school so early in the UK and he can have a snack then.

Children's appetites vary hugely - my DS has quite a small appetite and often hardly eats anything at lunchtime (and he's nearly a teenager now, so it's not always true that older kids eat you out of house and home).

I would work out which item he takes the longest to eat, literally a time and motion study and remove that item.

If its the fruit and you worry about him not having it then just give him fruit with dinner.

Half the sandwich and ditch the yogurt. My 7 year old told me she couldn't eat two slices with tuna so I began cutting it in half and eating the rest myself

Ds1 is 7 and a typical lunchbox is:

A two-slice-of-bread sandwich - ham/cheese/tuna etc
A pot of salad sticks
A tub of grapes
A largeish yoghurt
A penguin
Sometimes a boiled egg

Most days he eats everything.

I don't think your ds's lunch sounds like too much but it is very dependant on the child. If it seems to much, try cutting the crusts off the sandwiches or changing the cheesestick (which like a pp said, some kids take ages to eat) for a slice of cheddar. Grapes are also quicker to eat than an apple (if you cut them in half-the thought of mine taking whole grapes to school gives me chills, even ds1 at 7).

Ds1 would be horrified if he opened his lunch box to a sandwich and an apple!

Mine always eat a bigger breakfast, smaller lunch, and larger dinner. They have never had regular snacks so usually do go 6+ hours between meals. They eat on a school day roughly 8am breakfast, 12.30 school lunch, 7.30-8pm dinner. They are 4 and 5 and it's always been similar since babies.

On non school days lunch at home would be later, more like 1.30-2pm

Mine complain about lack of time to play too and would leave stuff so now all I give them is a sandwich, chopped fruit and a small biscuit/cake.
I think that's plenty.

The school dinners are far smaller than some kids packed lunches

I agree with this - and it's the reason mine don't have school dinners.

Ds2 (age 5) does fine on them, because he's only 5 afterall and he's not generally a big eater anyway.

For ds1, the meal portions are much, much smaller than he would have at home and the cake and custard (or whatever the dessert is) are much bigger . The few times he's had school dinners he's been starving at 3.30, which I think is a sign there's very little protein in them tbh.

Does he have fruit at snack time? If so then the second piece at lunch isn't really needed.
I would do sandwich (maybe cut off crusts or do shapes to make it less for him to eat), yoghurt OR cheese, fruit OR veggies.

If he is coming home hungry then I would add back in half a flapjack or small biscuit.

And as someone who is clincally qualified and who works in this area, you really are arguing with the wrong person. Lets just leave it at that shall we.

Sorry but I nearly pissed myself laughing at that!

Chill out, it's chat forum. You can claim to work for Gordon effing Ramsey if you like, but it's not going to make your posts or opinions any more valid than anyone else's.