to leave my 8 yo in the playground for 25 mins before school?

[FishFace99]

DD (3) starts nursery school on Tuesday. Its a 10 minute walk from DD (8) school and nursery school starts 20 mins before school. I can't work out the logistics of drop offs. 3 yo has some issues which mean she may take a while to drop off so if I keep 8 yo with me then she's likely tobe late for school. The other options I have are either to drop DD first which means she's alone in the playground for 25/30 mins or to let her walk from the nursery school alone if it looks like her sister will take a while to settle. It's a safe routewith only one road which has a lollipop lady. What would you do?

I would let her walk from nursery if its a straightforward route and she feels ok about it.

Neither option is neglectful. For those of you saying it is, you may want to consider what neglect really looks like and stop being so hard on the OP.

Why are you so concerned about getting her to nursery on time? Nursery can be flexible. Do school first, wait until a teacher and some other kids are there, then nursery.

I think the Op is having a hard time unnecessarily here. You know your child, Op, and dropping her early or encouraging her to walk a bit too would provide a great opportunity to foster some independence. Find another parent to keep an eye out or have a word with a teacher but I reckon she'll be fine.

I would either drop off at school first and let your youngest one be a little late for nursery or I'd leave youngest at nursery once coat off etc and get DD to school on time.
Even if youngest has additional needs, I think the nursery staff would rather handle the situation themselves with their own strategies. I've worked in a nursery and anxious/fussing parents can make the situation worse ime .

Ds (9.2) walks to school alone (as did his brothers). It's probably just less than 10 mins - one small road to cross - no crossing patrol. Most of the children in his year have been walking to and from school, without an adult, for the last couple of years and some live a good bit further away than we do. I would say it depends on the area. Our school gates don't open until 8:45 and children can't be left before that except at breakfast club where they have to be signed in.

My eight year old took herself to school, but the route had other parents and children going to the same school and safe pavements etc.

My youngest was getting picked up by SN transport and I couldn't be in two places at once.

It does depend on the child and I agree that it's easier to have a plan with the TA, that doesn't involve you prolonging your stay, when dropping off the younger one.

It's pretty normal where I am for 8 year olds to walk to school without an adult, but with friends. I'm quite at people saying it's neglect and a safeguarding issue. The schools around here quite regularly send letters home to the parents encouraging us to give them the independence of walking to/from school alone from P4, so age 8, because they find the children benefit so much from it.

What about your partner and getting flexi time to also do drop offs?

Drop 3yo then take 8yo. If 3 yo really can't be left, then go back afterwards.

Of course it's fine. She's 8!

She's 8 not 4.

if a teachers there within 5 mins of drop off its no problem surely?

Totally agree with Cloppysow! Neglect my backside! There is no safeguarding issue here with dropping an 8yo at school 25 min early with a staff member present in the school yard!

Our (village) school encourages all KS2 age kids to walk to school by themselves to encourage independence where possible. Unfortunately I still have one in yr1 so have to do the trip but will happily let them go unaccompanied once he's in yr3.

I'll see them across the one blind bend at the end of the lane then it's safe walking all the way - gates open at 8.45 and school starts at 9.

At my dd's school the gates to the playground aren't opened until 15 minutes before the bell and only year 6 are allowed to be in the playground without an adult (no teacher supervision in the mornings). I think there's probably a good reason for that!

I think this partly depends on the school. At my dc school it is expected that there will be kids in the playground from about half an hour before school starts and there is a teacher on duty specifically because of that. At 8 I used to drop my son just over the road from school just before supervision time started so if the teach er had been a bit late coming out I wouldn't have known.

However, if this is not the case with your school and you are relying on the good will of other parents to keep an eye out for her, that's not great. I would ask for a later start at nursery.

School won't let you as they don't have insurance before school starts. A stranger could take her as there wont be any adults supervision .

I'm so out of touch - I would have thought this was fine from about age 7 as it's what everyone did in the early 90's when I was at school. DS starts school next year, I'm going to have a lot of learning to do :D

Either use breakfast club or there is no Legal requirement for your 3yo to arrive at nursery at a certain time - speak to the nursery and explain that it is logistically impossible to a rive on time after dropping your dc off - usually you can leave dc at school once a teacher is in the playground?

Check if there is a teacher in the playground that early or see if DD can be with another child and parent. That's what I do. Drop DD in juniors and she waits with a friend and her son. Is only for 15 mins though.

Op has already said there is a staff member present from 25 minutes before school starts to facilitate kids being dropped early. As is the case in many schools.

A 10 minute walk for an 8 year old is neglectful? Really? I suppose it depends on the area you live. I wonder if the people saying that live near to busy roads or dodgy areas. In the area I live now and the area I grew up it would be completely normal. When I lived close to a city centre it would have been considered dangerous I suppose though.

Drop and run with the 3 year old. There were quite a few children with asd at ds's nursery school including ds and the staff always asked parents to leave quickly saying they would ring if there was a big problem.

No teachers working in our playground until the day properly begins and same applies to the classrooms, if they spend the early morning supervising my ds then some other task can't be done (or they work even more in the evening). For many months of the year this will be a miserable 25 mins in the rain alone. Be late for nursery instead, or get the drop off down to a fine art over time and go there first instead.

Both my children would have been fine walking at that age. Or hanging on information the playground. You know how sensible your child is at eight. If she is reliable, the only problem will be other busybody parents spouting neglect.

'Hanging on in the playground'