His brother (as usual) is organising everything and TOLD DP that he will wear a black suit, white shirt, black tie and be a pall bearer. No consultation, just instruction. In fact, he hasn't even called or texted DP about when the funeral actually is.
Backstory is that we don't live locally and DP has been a bit rubbish about calling his mum, but this is often because whenever you call she is on the phone or not in. However, DP should have called more. BIL has been excellent support to both his parents, i cannot take that from him, but it is done with a martyrs hat and also as a control thing. i am not keen on BIL
So part of me thinks DP should suck it up and wear the suit, BUT, my DP is built like a little sherman tank. He is not comfortable in a suit, never has been - he hasn't worn a suit to any special occasion so far, so DDs christening, my graduations and my dad's funeral (he was very close to my dad). He is also unlikely to be able to buy a suit off the peg due to his build and there is no way we could afford to have one made. Especially as this would be the one and only time he would wear it. He wore a pair of black trousers to my dad's funeral with a dark grey/white fine checked shirt, with black tie - he looked perfectly presentable and i had no problem with the lack of suit. Its about the person surely, not a fashion parade. His brother is very big on appearances showing off.