To start a pro-Dad thread?

[SarfEasticatedMumma]

I love the father of my daughter, because he is faithful, hardworking, loving and my best friend. He is also a fantastic loving father to our daughter.

I am not and never have been 'a viper'.

The idea that everyone on MN is a man-hater is total crap made up by a few fucking weirdos to justify their stupid asshole actions.

Yup.

This thread is a bit

I'm umm pro-dad, certainly.

What do you mean by viper op? Do you think Mumsnetters (who sometimes jokingly refer to themselves as vipers) are anti-dad in general?

Not actual anuses you understand. Most of them do a great job.

One of the comments on the Mirror piece, said that this was a place full of man-haters, so this thread is (hopefully) trying to show that isn't true. I'm also trying to disprove that we are always negative and at each others throats, as I don't see that side of this site at all. I really love it here, and think of it as a place of support and help, humour and friendship. I don't like to think of people misunderstanding that.

Oh don't worry about those tossers, op. Nothing we say or do will convince them otherwise.

Why on earth would it be unreasonable to be "pro-Dad"?

Surely that's the default position, unless you have a valid reason not to be? I'm sure every woman on this site would love to be pro-Dad about the man who fathered her child(REN).

MrZing is a brilliant father.
I wouldn't have had 7 children with him, if he wasn't.
Apart from giving birth and BF he can and will do everything with/for the children that I do (some things he does way better than me).
I love him loads. The kids adore him.
And he is King of Roast Potatoes. can't argue with that!

My dad is a prick, doesn't mean I hate men or dads in general.
While I alleviate the sentiment, this feels like feeding the trolls.
Women are allowed to have a voice to speak up when they are being abused. Other women are allowed to support them in doing so.

Appreciate not alleviate

My DH is a great dad.

Plus I wuv my dad very much he has just brought me a much needed cuppa. No one makes tea like my dad

Eh, while I see where you're coming from SarfEast, and completely agree that MN performs an important supportive role for many, I think you're giving critics of the site a bit too much credit. I don't think that the views of people who reckon all women on an internet site are 'man-haters' are based on an indepth analysis of those women's posts, and I don't reckon they going to perform such an analysis in future and revise their opinion. Some people just don't like women speaking/having an opinion/criticising men at all, unfortunately. I guess I feel like trying to change how we interact online in response to a few idiots and bullies is pointless (they're not going to change their view) and also giving them what they want (to stop the kind othey find offensive). The fact is, even threads where someone is complaining about their DH are not 'man-hating', and being a bit sarcastic and viperish online is totally every mner's prerogative.

Actually, my dad was a shit, who had an affair while married to my mum and left us when I was five. He always paid his child support though, at the princely sum of £3 a week until I took him to court at the age of 16 to have that increased to £10 a week while I was still in education. I saw him once after he left, which was in court.

And the father of my children had an affair when the youngest of our three children was 9 months old and left us for her and then left her for another OW when their kid was 9 months old. Then exposed the DCs to domestic abuse. I haven't had a penny in child maintenance from him for over ten years. So, he's a shit as well.

And I hate the patriarchy. I love individual men. My sons are fab, my bloke is lovely. I have some great male friends. But as a class, I don't like men very much at all to be honest. I'm not catering to this reconciliatory fluffy bollocks where we all manage to mention one or two blokes who are hands on with their own children so we stand and applaud them.

Of course it's anyone's prerogative to be viperish I was just using the term tongue in cheek. My intent was to show that we aren't what many of our critics think of us, and that the shorthand they have for us is incorrect.
That's all.

I love my own dad, my stepdad and my dp, the father of ds (4) who are kind, loyal, giving, smart, hardworking family men.

They all have their own personalities and qualites, but I love all three of them . Dp has always been really hands on. We broke up for a while after ds was born, and I allowed him equal contact (50/50 split) because he had proved every day when we were together that he was capable of looking after ds. Our relationship issues had nothing to do with his parenting skills. You can't, and most of us don't, tar all men with the same brush.

I see what you're trying to do but the kind of people who throw around epithets like 'man haters' are blind to reason.

One of the most bizarre things in the past few days, reading descriptions of this site in news reports, is that the comments are so far off the mark. More than once I've seen MN described as right wing!!! Try pedalling anti immigration pro welfare cuts crap around here and you'll be stamped on from 100 different directions.

Being women with opinions is what the vast majority of MNers have in common. It's depressingly predictable that we're viewed as a homogenous mass by non users, the media and hate groups.

I love my dad he is a kind, modest, gentle person and very loyal.

You want to congratulate fathers for essentially being fathers? That's straight from the school of thought that believes fathers babysit their children.

But the only people who actually are critical about mumsnet are desperate misogynist losers, sitting wanking in their bedroom at their mums. No one else gives a shit.

So why worry about them?

I took so long posting MelloJello said it much better.

A lot of Mumsnet critics mistake feminism for man hating, which is just lazy thinking really.

What a ridiculous thread.

Way to feed the trolls

I'm not catering to this reconciliatory fluffy bollocks where we all manage to mention one or two blokes who are hands on with their own children so we stand and applaud them.

Precisely.

I love my dad, who's been a great dad and grandad, and I'm proud to be a viper. :) I still like most men, though. I even have long term male friends.

My DH is a bloody marvellous Dad, the kids prefer him to me! His dad was a wife beating arsewipe who didn't see DH past the age of about 4 so DH was really worried before we had kids that he was made from the same mould. Couldn't be further from the truth.

And to be honest (sort of this has already been said but I haven't RTFT) i don't think posters come on here to post about how good their relationship is, they come on when there are problems which they need help with so that skews the perspective a bit. Plus I have seen plenty of threads from men posting for advice about relationships with their wives so saying MN is forviper like man hating women is just bollocks.