He's wipped his shit on my towels!!!

[WalfordEast]

Friend has decided to come to stay with her boyfriend this weekend.

Said boyfriend had a shower this morning, and obviously decided to wipe his arse on my towels. There is shit on one of them- sorry if TMI, but it's like skids, not chunks so I think it's just arse-drying-and-realising-your-arse-is-still-shitty iykwim.

Regardless, it's fucking disgusting and they were a birthday present- cost a small fortune from the white company.

AIBU to go out tomorrow and buy another and give him the bill???

I haven't confronted- but I made a point of putting the towels in the wash as we sat down for dinner earlier and he didn't even look embarrassed.

Just don't use aqua fresh. ..

I can't even read to the end of all the posts, laughing too much.

I think we are over analysing (oops see what I did there, got "anal" into a another word).

Guest had a quick shower, quick dry, accidentally put a skidder on the posh white towel, didn't see because he probably threw it on the floor/hung it up and he didn't inspect it. Yes he may have piles, or just a filthy crack. Oh well. Not your boyfriend. Don't embarrass him or your friend, just boil wash the towel and move on to world peace or something.

What was the diagnosis for the Tupperware tapeworm lady? I can remember the thread, but not whether it was actually a tapeworm

I can't remember.

mathanxiety did you have to say 'don't google'? I have now seen prolapsed internal haemorrhoids. Thanks for that

I read this thread in bed on Friday night and could not stop guffawing, reading bits out to husband and shrieking again with hysterical laughter. My favourite bit was the guy with shit smeared lavvy paper hanging out of his Speedos. Well, husband turned down our customary Friday night shag. Said I'd put him right off. Oh, OP, do you see what you've done?

. I'm not sure if your complaining or not there honeylulu

I feel I should have prepared a Waiver of Responsibility.

They don't wash properly, then wipe their sweaty pits and arse cracks on my nice clean towels.
The towels end up smelling of hot dogs

I don't remember ever having actively smelt a hot dog let alone my guests used towels