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AIBU?

To not want to take Mil on holiday with us?

108 replies

CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:07

Dh and I renewed our vows abroad last year, and really want to go back to the same resort for a holiday with dd next year.

Last year was lovely, but it was a bit exhausting making sure all of our guests (20 plus us) were enjoying their holidays and having a good time. The up side though was we did get a fair amount of time to ourselves while dd was off on sleepovers with mil, my parents and my dsis and her children. This time round it will just be the three of us, and we will hae time to really make the most of the resort. (It is an all inclusive Holiday Village)

I mentioned the holiday to Mil last night, and that we were really looking forward to it. I've just spoken to DH and apparently Mil rang him this morning and has asked of she can come too. Shock DH thinks this would be a great idea, she has apparently offered to babysit dd for a couple of nights so we can go out.

AIBU to think that actually, this sounds like a really bad idea and say no?

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 13/08/2015 13:08

After your previous experiences of family holidays I cannot believe you'd even consider this Grin.

Are you stark bollock mad!

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TheHumourlessHarpy · 13/08/2015 13:09

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Writerwannabe83 · 13/08/2015 13:11

Earlier this year my FIL joined me, DH and DS on a two week holiday and it was really, really hard at times.

When we came back both me and DH said "Never again!!" Grin

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SaucyJack · 13/08/2015 13:12

It's sounds great to me. You could get matching swimsuits and share one big family room. Rub sun cream into each other's back. Cosy meals out for four. What's not to love?

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PUGaLUGS · 13/08/2015 13:13

Now listen here Catthief... What would you say to someone else asking this eh? Do YOU really need to have to ask if it is a really bad idea? Grin c'mon I think you know it will be...

And I never in a million years thought this would be you asking!

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 13/08/2015 13:14

NO
NO
NO
NO
NO
NO
NO
NO.

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PUGaLUGS · 13/08/2015 13:14

Oh my! See I am not the only one thinking the same!

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knickernicker · 13/08/2015 13:14

Unless the babysitting undoing to be a very big benefit to you, don't do it. It'll make you miserable.

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:17

SSCSD - At least it won't be fucking Tunisia this time!

Actually, to be fair, mil was much better behaved last year than my family.

It gets better. Apparently DH has said yes. And that it is his treat for her looking after dd one day each week (For which I am very grateful, obviously)

FFS.

That pushes the price up considerably!

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gallicgirl · 13/08/2015 13:17

was that the holiday where you slept on the balcony under a beach towel?

If you say yes to the MIL, I will write you an official insanity certificate.

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 13/08/2015 13:19

KILL HIM!

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:19

We said 'Never Again' after Cyprus. Then I went to Tunisia in April with my parents and sister.

I will definitely never holiday with my family again. I do feel a bit sorry for mil though. She's all on her own. And she is very good to dd....

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:21

No gallicgirl. That was Tunisia in April. Me, a lilo, a beach towel and a very scabby cat. That particular night is the reason I will never ever holiday with my family again.

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JeanSeberg · 13/08/2015 13:22

Could you arrange another holiday with her? A long weekend/Centerparcs/whatever else you fancy?

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LIZS · 13/08/2015 13:22

Nooo! Before you know it they will all invite themselves along.

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BitterChocolate · 13/08/2015 13:27

Let her take your place, so no extra cost, and have a lovely week at home by yourself. I can guarantee that by the time your DH comes back he will have learned his lesson about fucking around with the family holiday.

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:27

Sil has already booked her holidays for next year, as have my side, so we should be safe on that score at least. Besides, my parents did nothing but moan about the resort last time so I doubt they would want to go back! Grin

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Ohfourfoxache · 13/08/2015 13:28

Oh for the love of all that's holy.......

Sorry Keith but I think that, after this, you and DH need to make it very very clear that you intend to holiday by yourselves. Forever.

I've got nowt else to suggest I'm afraid but I will keep my eye open for your live holiday thread! When are you going?

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:29

But I really want to go back! Sad

Dh wants me to get a price for a 2 bed appartment. I am thinking more like 2 seperate ones!

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4seasons · 13/08/2015 13:31

Having spent years on caravan holidays with the dc and the PIL , followed by a 5 week fly -drive holiday in Australia with both 83 yr old PIL , followed by a holiday each year with widowed FIL ( a man who always got his own way about which activities / visits we did ) for 3 consecutive years .....on balance I would say you are quite mad to even consider this !!! You will set a precedent for the future believe me. What is it with men and their parents ? Why can't they just say no to requests like this ? You can be pleasant and polite about it surely? My guess would be that if you object he will say that you need to tell her....or perhaps that's just my DH !! And just in case you were wondering , I liked my PIL but liked my DH a little less each time we had to go on holiday with them. And as for babysitting ... we used to get one evening out of about 3/4 weeks holidaying because .... " it's our holiday too you know. " Priceless. Do not do it.

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Ohfourfoxache · 13/08/2015 13:31

Is he mad Shock

If you can you must have separate apartments Shock

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averythinline · 13/08/2015 13:32

And when ur family says that's not fair we want to come as well?... He can go back and say no...can't believe he didn't talk to you about it first....or is that cos he knew you'd say no?... I'd be furious if do did that too me ...I love my family holiday real quality time together.....

If he wants to take her on holiday he can do that himself another time.....this is your family...he can lie say it's full if he needs an excuse

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CatthiefKeith · 13/08/2015 13:37

God Knows what he was thinking. She hasn't been very well so I am guessing he was felling sorry for her.

IF we go, it will be at Easter. We haven't even booked it yet!

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RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime · 13/08/2015 13:38

Your DH doesn't get to say yes without asking you first. That would work the other way round too.

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RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime · 13/08/2015 13:41

It's odd to invite yourself on someone else's holiday. Given that many people would say yes out of politeness, you could easily be going along unwanted and muscling in on their break... Why anyone would want to do that, I do not know. Unless she can't imagine why you wouldn't want her to go?

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