Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DC to use Nan/Nana

294 replies

treehousepicture · 10/08/2015 09:52

I have just never liked this word and think I prefer grandma or similar but is it up to the person what they are called?

OP posts:
ProcrastinatorGeneral · 10/08/2015 11:22

Soot nannying is a pretty lucrative job if you're good at it. I have a friend who nannied for years and wouldn't dream of her children calling any grandparent nanny because it's a job title. There's no need to be snotty.

DisappointedOne · 10/08/2015 11:23

I don't get the 'children will call them what they want' thing either. They'll call them by the name they learn, same as any other name.

Nope. Mum was Nanna and Dad was Grandpa. DD started calling them different, non-grandparent names and it stuck. They prefer them, I've only ever heard of 1 grandad being called the same by a grandchild. Even DD's teacher refers to my parents by these names. I suppose we could have pushed it, but it suited us to let DD choose.

(A cousin of mine couldn't pronounce his sibling's name as a small child and called them something completely different. Everyone else started calling them that too as a nickname which is still used 50 years on. It's not that unusual.)

Coffeemarkone · 10/08/2015 11:25

And I agree, 'Nanny' is a salaried job title - not a snob, just being factual.

maybebabybee · 10/08/2015 11:26

coffee but plenty of people DO call their grandmothers Nanny. It's irrelevant that it's also a salaried job title, surely.

MrsDeVere · 10/08/2015 11:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rollonthesummer · 10/08/2015 11:27

Grandma sounded so twee and formal, I still think it does actually and it brings connotations of a little old lady with white hair and round glasses sitting in a rocking chair by a fireplace knitting. How many grandmothers are actually like that these days?

Ha ha-that's exactly what image the names granny and nanny conjure up for me! I think of grandma as being quite young and active as that's what my mum is!

Coffeemarkone · 10/08/2015 11:30

" plenty of people DO call their grandmothers Nanny "

I know they do, and am sure they are lovely nannies too.
It just grates a bit on me personally.

ProcrastinatorGeneral · 10/08/2015 11:31

DisappointedOne my youngest had trouble with his siblings names and had his own interpretation of them for a long time, and even though he can now say them he chooses not to. The siblings now use those names and I even catch myself doing it. Chuffing spawns! :o

RatOnnaStick · 10/08/2015 11:32

We had little choice. DH's parents have always been Nanny C and Grandad M to other grandchildren so ours fell in with that. My mum had an aversion to Gran names as her mum was Granny and she basically hated her, they have ended up being called Nanny P and Grandad D by our children by their own choice.

I had zero say in the matter.

Its a familial title. Who outside the people using them really cares what it sounds like or who in the past may or may not have used it?

And so what if its also a goat? Whats wrong with that?

CrystalMcPistol · 10/08/2015 11:32

Nanny sound so much older to than Gran or Granny.

It makes me picture some ancient Victorian retainer in a starched pinafore sitting in a long deserted attic nursery.

Costacoffeeplease · 10/08/2015 11:33

I have quite a few friends who have recently become grandparents, and I think they've all opted for nanny, which I think is hideous, but if they're happy...... My husband's maternal grandmother was 'Flo' it wasn't her real name, and none of them could remember why they called her Flo, but I think it was great to have something different and I guess there must have been a reason why it stuck even though none of them can remember what it was

LastOneDancing · 10/08/2015 11:33

I've heard that the use of 'Nanny' or 'Nana' barely impacts the ability of a grandmother to love and care for their grandchildren.

But you know, it was probably a Northern study that concluded that.

Is it worth the risk?

Hmm
CrystalMcPistol · 10/08/2015 11:34

Probably not.

Choccyhobnob · 10/08/2015 11:35

As my baby is going to have 8 grandparents and 8 great grandparents (both mine and DH's parents are divorced and remarried and he has all 4 of his grandparents still alive) I'm sure there are going to be all sorts of names dreamt up for them! Nobody ever uses Grandma or Granny in our families though so they will all be a variation of Nana/Nanny/Great Nanny surname/first name depending on whether they are our stepmothers etc! Strangely we use both Grandad and Grandpa but hate the word Grandma!

MrsDeVere · 10/08/2015 11:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Girlsbrigadewashorrible · 10/08/2015 11:36

My DM always hoped to be Grandma but MIL beat her to it. I suggested Granny and she prefers it now, especially because of HM.
So we had Granny and Grandad, and Grandma and Grandpa.

MrsDeVere · 10/08/2015 11:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Coffeemarkone · 10/08/2015 11:40

well I went to a comprehensive and do watch EastEnders, but still find 'Nan' grating. Does that make me a bad person MrsDV, oh wisest one?

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 10/08/2015 11:47

I went to a comprehensive and I live in the North but I don't watch Eastenders... and I'm not keen on Nan/Nanny/Nana at all. Just like there are lots of first names I don't like!

MrsDeVere · 10/08/2015 11:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bavmorda · 10/08/2015 11:55

IME those who feel strongly about often do because they dislike their MIL and automatically dislike the name their MIL is known by.

KeyserSophie · 10/08/2015 11:56

In our family it seems to get passed down, so mum is 'granny' as that's what we called her mum, and dad is 'gramps' as that's what his father was called. They basically told me what they'd be. Worked out well as they have a Grandma and Grandad on the other side that was already a done deal due to other grandkids. Nanna is a bit common but I had a lovely Nanna so I don't care Grin I embrace it along with the Golden Arches And Amaretto.

Coffeemarkone · 10/08/2015 11:58

Snobbishness works both ways MrsDV y know.
No need to get that chippy - it is only a word.

shaska · 10/08/2015 12:03

I was stuck with two grannies and desperately wanted a nana or nan growing up. Even nanny would've done.

Anyway, who gives a toss basically. Tossers, that's who.

SylvanianCaracal · 10/08/2015 12:06

My veeerry posh MIL is Nana because she asked not to be called Grandma/Granny if possible because it had bad associations for her. We couldn't force the DC to use it but we encouraged it and it has stuck.

My mum is therefore Granny and thinks she's the bees knees because she got the "better" name Hmm Never mind that she doesn't give a hoot about my DC!

I do think the grandparent's preference should matter if possible (just as you may have a preference for what you're called as their parent). Small children won't always do it, of course. But I don't think it's for the parent to decide on the grounds of what they like. In a way it's between grandparent and grandchild surely.

I gave my granddad a ridiculous made-up name when I was 1, which became the poor bloke's nickname for life among the entire family.