To think MN is getting nastier?

[MaggieJoyBlunt]

So far this week we've had giving birth referred to as 'calving' (in the context of women having children while young). Someone loved that one so much they immediately commented on what a great expression it was and repeated it.

We've had someone propose that Prince Phillip should be 'humanely destroyed'. swiftly followed up by a similar suggestion about taking him out to a barn or a shed or some such and shooting him.

We've had a thread about the death of a convicted murdered where several posters queued up to tell us they were, smiling or "laughing gleefully" or simply to post "lol" as a one word comment. (Okay she was a vicious killer and will not be much missed, but really?)

Add to all of that the Budget threads where in the midst of people worrying and calculating the cut to their household budget, other people came to gloat and make helpful observations such as "If you can't afford DC, don't have them."

MN didn't used to be nasty. Vigorous, challenging etc; But not nasty.

What's going on around here?

I've been on and off MN for ten years, and think it has definitely changed. AIBU and chat have dumbed down but you can still get good advice and insights on the other boards. I think the trick is to stick to the boards you have an interest in.

I also find the grammar and spelling bashing quite nasty.

For a website that's so switched on about special needs, and with so many posters giving so much thought as to why someone in the street or on a bus might act a certain way, I'm surprised such nastiness towards anyone with less than perfect SPAG often goes unchallenged.

It not fair that some people who need advice, probably feel as though they're not welcome here to ask for it, just because some people have this need to make themselves feel superior by pointing out the "It's have, not of " for example.

It's not necessarily 'being shouted down' just because you lost an argument.

Oh, PLEASE can somebody teach this to everyone??!

Being entitled to your opinion doesn't mean you're entitled to have everyone agree with you. Plus, opinions can change. Listening seems to be an undervalued skill.

I don't agree. There was some real nastiness by MN royalty that was allowed to stand. They seem to have left (maybe kids grew up?) one by one, to much hoo hah, but honestly, I think it is for the better.

Maggie I think the issue is it's gone global, mainstream, whatever the word is - like Glastonbury did.

That means you inevitably get more thick people (sorry but some people are really thick) and therefore the tone just descends.

I've been here for 8 and a half years and it has changed so much as to not be recognisable any more.

I am still here for some reason though have sporadically left and come back. It isn't somewhere I am proud to be a member of any more, though - well, sometimes I get a glimmer of that - but mainly I don't like to admit I use it due to its media image and the sheer amount of horridness on here.

There is good stuff too, obvs. But I kwym.

I do think the introduction of AIBU was the thing that really broke it though. That was a mistake from the off. it's never recovered.

Can I also say the blind following of all that is printed in the guardian, as if it's some kind of holy Bible, on this forum really makes me go

Who are the 'royalty'? I see some prolific posters who I sometimes agree with, and sometimes not. But I'm yet to work out who the 'royalty' are.

I've been about for 5 years or so.

Royalty as a concept on here was done to death about 5 years ago. since then it doesn't really work as there are too many bits of MN, too many people, new joiners constantly, it's a vast vast place now and if it were a festival it would now be £300 a ticket and be spread over about 12 square miles of what used to be farmland.

Not that I liked the Royalty thing much anyway (except when I got called it, ha)

I think there very much was a very clear set of royalty/MN queen bee clique if you prefer, a lot left/flounced and then the rest of them have been drowned out by the vast number of other people on here. Its much better for it.

Can I also say the blind following of all that is printed in the guardian, as if it's some kind of holy Bible, on this forum really makes me go

Pft.

If any paper is followed blindly on MN it's the Mail.

I find the 'royalty' stuff really odd - it's always made me laugh

Other forums get it as well - people banging on about cliques etc - one of the things I liked about MN is it's vastness and the lack of cliquishness

PC is often used here completely wrongly - and yes, by people who want to be offensive

ditto the 'professionally offended' shit - usually spouted by people who post stuff to be professionally offensive

I like it here - I do agree with the idea it's got a bit more stupid lately though

One does not read the Guardian

I get the Guardian on Sat when I remember - other than that it's the local paper once a week and online news for me

exit

Unsure on the royalty tbh but I do agree about it being nastier, there seems to be quite a few who think they can read who you are as a person from a few anonymous posts on a thread which is frankly plain stupid.
Didn't see any of the threads referred to in OP thankfully.
I think when I first joined there was bitchiness but it was more tongue in cheek & perhaps amusing.

I wouldn't say nastier. I've been here since 2006. Then there was the MN royalty. A nasty bunch who would roam the boards in gangs picking on people but supporting each other whilst doing it.
I think the nature of the posts is become more facile. it does seem 'stupider' yes.

I think when I first joined there was bitchiness but it was more tongue in cheek & perhaps amusing.

Yes, the cut and thrust and the ribbing were far superior.

No totally disagree op.

I have been a mumsnetter for 10 years and if anything it's better now as a much wider circle of opinions.

If dont want to be on a site full
of north London guardian reading tree hugging liberals how fucking boring.

Equally don't want to be on a site with purely daily mail UKIP voters.

It's far better now.

I think the thick comments are usually applied by people who have the temerity to disagree with one and that's generally hilarious as are the twats who comment on spelling and grammar. I assume they are spiteful smug twats anyway and ignore.

Some posts like the dd who though her dm needed to smarten up and catch a bloke just ask to be teased.

The calf comment was horrible I agree and was pointed out.

On the whole if you need real help mumsnet is invaluable for support or advice. If you post like a twat you get treated like one.

Who hasn't been told they are idiots on mumsnet? I have and I was. Serve me right.

It's the internet.

I also find the grammar and spelling bashing quite nasty.

Oh YYY to ^ and I would also like to add that though my spelling and grandma is actually pretty good, I am however a RUBBISH typist even after all these years. (Typing was the only class I ever failed in my otherwise upper mediocre school daze).

Definitely. There's a thread right now where someone used the term 'create' to mean tantrum. Most posters understood the meaning, even if it is a regional expression, but the first couple of responses were really bitchy comments - 'creating what?' etc. The context made it entirely obvious anyway but some people just have to make a point/a snide comment. Not nice.

My absolute hate on here is people not reading the OP properly and then weighing in and attacking the OP because they've misunderstood. The whole thread then gets derailed with posters agreeing with the mistaken responders, as opposed to actually answering eg an OP's AIBU. There was a recent thread about posting funeral pictures on Facebook. The poor OP got ripped to shreds, despite having her own hideous situation to contend with, by loads of posters who clearly hadn't understood what she meant properly. Really really nasty stuff was said - makes you wonder who is actually behind the keyboard sometimes.

Mumsnet is definitely not the friendly, helpful place I joined around 5 years ago.

WOW where did Exits crown come from?

The only time it's acceptable to correct someone's spelling is when they've made a typo in an arsey comment about another user's spelling and grammar.

If you post like a twat you get treated like one.

Who hasn't been told they are idiots on mumsnet? I have and I was. Serve me right.

Yes, I agree.

The examples in my OP are the kind of thing I'm describing as 'nastiness'. I wouldn't put "You're being an idiot", "That's a bit twatty", "You're being a GF" etc in the same bracket at all.

that is true (and should also Be In The Rules)