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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go on holiday with my chicken pox ridden DC?

289 replies

NighteyesLovesGingerbread · 17/07/2015 11:05

Basically my DC all have chicken pox. we are due to go on holiday in 2 days.

my friend has just said ' I hope you have insurance now you wont be going away' and then proceeded to tell me how unreasonable I was being when I said we were still going and how dangerous it is for others. I am well aware of this, I have several extended family members who are immune-compromised so understand the risks to them.

we are driving to the holiday destination and staying in a stand alone private house with private pool. obviously I will not take DC into the service stations or supermarkets etc but as far as I can see there is no reason for us not to go as they wont be in contact with anyone other than us.

so, AIBU to still go on holiday in this situation.

OP posts:
NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 15:42

I got chicken pox a few years ago without even being in contact with the infected person. My sister visited my cousin who had it and the following day I got in a car with her and next thing I had chicken pox. That's how infectious it is. So YABU OP the risk is not minuscule on the tunnel at all.

NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 15:43

The following day!!

bigbumtheory · 19/07/2015 17:25

OP with the tunnel, you can defer your ticket for up to a year if you call them up. You don't even need a reason. My bf has done it in the past before when too ill to visit family. Perhaps you could do the same to the holiday place?

Have you spoken to the GP?

DinoSnores · 19/07/2015 21:12

nugget, you really didn't get it from your sister's cousin. Firstly you can't get it from a non-infected person. The incubation period of chicken pox is days so you don't develop it as quickly as that. Your sister would have had to have chicken pox and breathing out the virus and then you would need to catch it and then develop the reaction. It was just coincidence that your sister's cousin and then you got chicken pox.

Northernlurker · 19/07/2015 21:41

I agree nugget - no way did you contract chicken pox like that! You got it because it's endemic and plenty of adults and kids walk around not knowing they are infectious.

NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 22:01

Well the doctor said that is how I got it. And a bit of a big coincidence no?

I didn't get it the following day, I meant that I was with my sister the following day from when she had been at my cousin's house. I developed the spots about three or four days later.

Northernlurker · 19/07/2015 22:14

No you caught it about ten days before you got in the car. I think the doctor misunderstood the timeline you gave them.

NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 22:14

"Stop the virus spreading
Chickenpox can sometimes be spread through contact with objects that have been contaminated with the virus, such as children's toys, bedding or clothing."

From NHS website.

NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 22:20

I just checked the dates there. My sister visited cousin and then gave me a lift the next day about 9 days before I came out in spots. So that timeline makes sense.

NuggetofPurestGreen · 19/07/2015 22:23

What the doctor said was my sister and family's clothes could have been contaminated (like the NHS website says) and I got it from their clothes. So I'm going to believe my trusted health professional and the NHS website rather than MNers I think.

mellicauli · 19/07/2015 22:57

I love holidays but if I am ill, I just want to be at home. Not sitting in a car for hours on end. Or getting hot in a foreign country. Eating unfamiliar food in a strange house. I would hated it when I was ill on holiday. I couldn't wait to go home. Won't your children feel like that too?

Hillbilly71 · 20/07/2015 01:07

My dd got chickenpox at 13 months. She appeared ok for the first two days but her spots became infected (she was crawling) with strep and staph bacteria. We were in hospital for a week and dressing her scars for six weeks. She was healthy beforehand. A boy the same age as her who had it at the same time didn't make it. At one point we didn't think she would too. Chickenpox kills more than mumps and measles in this country. Luckily most people get it mildly. Look out for any redness spreading around the spots and make sure anyone with sore throats doesn't go near them.

Original poster
NighteyesLovesGingerbread · 20/07/2015 08:35

I spoke to a GP who said basically that the official guideline is to not travel, but realistically there are so many people walking around not knowing they are infectious, and therefore not taking any precautions it would be unnecessary to cancel the holiday in our circumstances. assuming I stick to the precautions I outlined to him then he thinks the risk of infecting anyone is very very small and does not justify cancelling the holiday assuming the DC are well in themselves.

another medically trained friend said that she would also go and mentioned that a week in the pool would do wonders to stop the itching for them.

so we will be going but I would say that:

DC1 is fully scabbed. DC2 &3 are not but have a comparatively mild case, they are not unwell in themselves and are playing and eating as normal. I would not consider them 'ill' in that sense. they will be fully scabbed by the time we are due to travel back.

we will keep them away from people - including keeping them in the car in the tunnel, parking at the far end of service station car parks for leg stretches and using a portable toilet for the younger 2 DC.

we will travel with enough food and drink so that we don't have to go into service station concourses.

we are staying in a private house with no visitors. we will take our own bedding for the DC and I will personally give the house a thorough clean before we leave. we will take our own toys for the DC.

we know where the nearest hospital is and can converse in the language should treatment be necessary.

to those that said 'just cancel and rebook' - this is just not an option, extended family are joining us, its a big deal for us and if we cancel that will be it, no holiday this year at all. not saying our right for a holiday trumps health concerns but it isn't true to say ' just cancel and rebook' is an option for us.

Thank you for everyone's thoughts and opinions.

OP posts:
WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat · 20/07/2015 09:42

Look it was obvious that you were always going to go, and that you had absolutely no intentions of cancelling.

And yes, you are saying that your right to a holiday trumps other people's health. It's one thing travelling when you have no idea you're infectious and quite another to travel when you know you're risking other people, no matter how small the risk.

The gp has told you that the official guidelines are to not travel, but that clearly doesn't concern you.

Not really sure why you posted the thread in the first place.

Sirzy · 20/07/2015 09:52

Your going for 2 weeks though, so why not just go 3 or 4 days later but without taking the risk?

Only1scoop · 20/07/2015 09:56

Also not sure why Op posted.

Original poster
NighteyesLovesGingerbread · 20/07/2015 10:04

oh yawn. look, unless there is a completely unanimous YABU/YANBU then of course around half of the posters are going to feel 'ignored' 'not sure why you posted' etc.

plenty of people said they would go. I have taken medical advice as suggested, and he said to go.

just because an OP doesn't change their mind doesn't mean there was no point to posting.

sirzy I have already said several times that the ticket is not flexible, we cant change it. we would lose the holiday if we don't go today.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 20/07/2015 10:06

You could always book another ticket, sorry but given you are using the tunnel you are being selfish. But hey as long as you get your holiday it doesn't matter if you make others ill!

Only1scoop · 20/07/2015 10:09

'Yawn' Grin

I can see the spotty little faces pressed against the windows in the Chunnel 'let me out'

Have a fun journey.

WoonerismSpit · 20/07/2015 10:12

What if there is a baby in your carriage? Will you tell the parents?

You selfish person. I genuinely hope you get stopped and sent back.

Wolfiefan · 20/07/2015 10:12

I'm so glad that my child is no longer immuno suppressed.
God help anyone travelling who is.
As for "yawn" I'm so sorry all the stories of serious life threatening chicken pox complications are so boring to you.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 20/07/2015 10:17

Hmm, I just can't see you sticking to all those rigid things you need to do to keep everyone around you safe. Doesn't sound much of a holiday to me with all those conditions.

Original poster
NighteyesLovesGingerbread · 20/07/2015 10:26

i will not be returning to the thread now.

life is a calculated risk, we have assessed the risk and deemed it acceptable to us in our situation and we have actually taken medical advice.

thank you to everyone who shared their thoughts. they were read and considered but I am not going to stay to read a whole host of angelic MNers who i'm sure are all so perfect and self sacrificing having a hissy fit because they didn't get their way. so vent away but I wont be reading it. drives me nuts how many threads end up this way just because you don't agree.

wolfie you misunderstand, the yawn was purely about the expected 'why did you post if you don't agree with me' responses that have now started appearing.

Note to self: don't bother to update, its not worth the hassle.

OP posts:
nemo81 · 20/07/2015 11:16

I feel sorry for the unsuspecting family staying in the holiday home after you and swimming in the pool your infected kids have been in. Nice.

Kayden · 20/07/2015 11:32

"not saying our right for a holiday trumps health concerns."

Well, it does in the end, doesn't it? Hmm

If you have any decency, you will let anyone else in your carriage know about the chicken pox because they can seek medical advice immediately and receive anti-viral medication. If you don't do anything else, at least do this.