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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parking wars!

90 replies

YNK · 14/07/2015 14:51

I live in a Victorian Terrace and myself and my daughter have cars which we park in the road in front. It takes up slightly more space than my housefront but both neighbours on either side of me are more than happy with it.

A neighbour further down the block parks in front of our cars with a white van outside an elderly disabled couples house.
On friday night I parked up close to my daughter so he had plenty of room to get in (busy road) but after she left for a short weekend break he parked so close to me it was a major feat getting out and, in particular, back in. He had plenty of room behind him so I was a bit annoyed.

I have very poor mobility so I had no choice but to hold up the traffic in order to manouver which led to me being intimidated by other drivers horns blaring at me. It was very close to me not being able to get out at all and being trapped in the house.

On Sunday I left a note on his windscreen explaining my difficulty and asking him to please leave me enough room.

He came to see me last night and told me that his landlord owns and shares the house he lives in and he has been told not to park in front of his own home because it obstructs his landlords view. His landlord has an even bigger van which he very occasionally parks in front of his own house though.

He asked if one of us could park up the block so he can park in front of my house to keep his landlord happy. Obviously I can't without needing a wheelchair and my daughter has a young child and does all our shopping so I said this was a bit of a daft idea. He went away but left his address in case I ever need to ask him to move. Thinking about it later I realised this would only be the case if both big vans parked there but that has never happened before so I put it out of mind.

Today the landlords van is outside his neighbours. Together the two vans will take up 3 housefronts and leave things tight for us again and I'm worried the landlord intends to make an issue of it.

He often blocks the lane behind the house so we just drive around the block if this happens, however my daughter was unloading stuff one day and he was very rude to her and demanded she move immediately to let him pass. His ex wife left him because of DV so I'm a bit wary of him.

I think they are BU.
I think the landlord and his tenant need to come to a better understanding that doesn't involve me but what will I do if it turns nasty?

OP posts:
Anon4Now2015 · 14/07/2015 14:55

If it's a public road with no designated parking or permits then it's everyone for themselves when it comes to parking. It would be nice if he would leave you both room to park outside your house but if he won't you have no right to it.

Could you ask for a disabled space to be put in outside your house?

CuthbertDibble · 14/07/2015 14:58

If it's a public road then anyone can park where they like. It might be worth you contacting the council to see if they are able to provide a disabled space in front of your property.

TheHumourlessHarpy · 14/07/2015 15:01

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woodhill · 14/07/2015 15:06

I hate vans, wish they could be parked off road.

one parks opposite and makes it hard to manoeuvre out of the drivd

NerrSnerr · 14/07/2015 15:10

It's fair game if it's a public road. Could you get yourself a disabled bay?

Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 15:11

My daughter is relevant since she is my carer.

OP posts:
TheHumourlessHarpy · 14/07/2015 15:15

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Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 15:17

Ok, in one stroke he gets to make life impossible for the elderly, the disabled, women and children who live on the block.
I think I will have to re evaluate my life.

Thanks for confirming my fears wise mumsnetters. Sad

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 14/07/2015 15:17

Your daughter can park anywhere though. It's a pain in the arse when you have a small child but that's the risk you take when you live somewhere without allocated parking.

ecuse · 14/07/2015 15:18

I think you need to contact the council to get a disabled bay, otherwise you have no recourse. If you were my neighbour I'd try to avoid parking in front of your house if I knew you were disabled but then I'd begrudge it a bit if that just left space free for others to nip in.

NerrSnerr · 14/07/2015 15:18

Have you looked into getting yourself a disabled bay? That'd solve most of it wouldn't it?

fairyfuckwings · 14/07/2015 15:19

Is there any way you could convert your front garden into a parking space?

Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 15:52

I don't have a garden and tbh, I don't really want to make a big show of my disability. I just want to be able to get out of the house once in a while and not inconvenience anyone.
There is plenty of space for all of us but as I say his landlord wants an uninterrupted view (of the busy road? Hmm)

When I moved here I was able to get into my yard at the back but the neighbour opposite my rear yard entrance has taken back the space that allowed this.
The landlord has a large rear yard with parking for his van and his tenants wife's car and an unobstructed entrance.

I suppose if he wants he can take away my independence and there is nothing I can do about it. Sad

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 14/07/2015 15:54

You can't have it both ways. You can't complain that you need to park outside of your house because you're disabled but refuse to get a disabled bay put in. If it's that much of a problem then call the council.

Lurkedforever1 · 14/07/2015 16:00

Yabu purely because legally he can park where he likes, first come first served with street parking,even though the considerate thing would be to make sure you not your daughter too could park outside your home.
Ywnbu to apply for a disabled space though

orangepudding · 14/07/2015 16:01

You can do something, you can apply for a disabled space. I understand you don't want to make a display of your disability but it will give you peace ofind. Also someone else could get an extra car which would make parking even more difficult so its worth applying for a space now.

Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 16:03

My daughter saw him pacing the pavement last night.
She described him pacing back and forth and thought he was drunk. I'm starting to wonder if he was measuring out spaces now so he can block me in.

I have been on waving terms with him since he moved here and my daughter has said both men have chatted her up outside the house.
Soon after he arrived he asked to put a 'no fouling' sign on my yard door and I was happy to agree. I invited him in and made him tea while he did it. He said he was surprised I had agreed because I have dogs and it was a brand new yard door. I kind of wondered a bit because I noticed he hadn't put signs on his own yard door or any others but mine. Not that I minded, I wanted to be welcoming to him.
Maybe I'm reading too much into it now though. I do hope so or my life is in the toilet.

OP posts:
Littlecaf · 14/07/2015 16:06

YABU. They can park where they like. While you might not wish to make a show if your disability you can't expect others to mind where they park if they don't know about it. They might be disabled themselves.

Funkingownit · 14/07/2015 16:06

Yabu
Every fucker in our town parks on our street, we hardly get to park on our own Street, let alone outside our house. And although we don't have a disability, we do have a young baby, and another on the way. Tough shit for us Sad

Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 16:06

If I have to I will need to get a disabled space I suppose.
[sigh] all this because I tried to be considerate and give them plenty of space!

OP posts:
Littlecaf · 14/07/2015 16:06

You sound a little paranoid too!

Spartans · 14/07/2015 16:08

Measuring how to block you on purpose? I really think you are over reacting with that.

If you want easy access to your house because you are disabled, then apply for a disabled spot. You can't have it all ways.

Mum has a hidden disability and used to get annoyed at things to work but didn't want them to know she was disabled. When she finally told them, things got easier.

PurpleHairAndPearls · 14/07/2015 16:18

There is a way to ensure you have a parking space and that is to apply for a disabled space outside. Otherwise everyone is equally entitled to park legally wherever they like, whatever their circumstances.

"I have very poor mobility so I had no choice but to hold up the traffic in order to manouver which led to me being intimidated by other drivers horns blaring at me."

I say this as a disabled driver myself, but if you cannot manoeuvre effectively due to poor mobility, should you be driving? I understand how shit it is as I have days I cannot drive (last two weeks and counting, sigh) but if your disability is impacting on your driving skills you either need adaptations or not to be driving. Apologies if I have read it wrongly, but my friend was in a car accident caused by another drivers medical issues which meant he shouldn't have been driving.

eatyouwithaspoon · 14/07/2015 16:26

Where i live now people tend to try to park in front of their own houses which with the gardens are big enough for 2 cars in what I call town parking ie plenty of room to get in and out without much manoeuvring. Many years ago I lived where there were lots of flats and terraces which where approx one car length wide so there it was every man for himself and often I would gave to park streets away and city park so leaving little room and more manoeuvring required to get in or out. If they have all the appropriate documents in place they can park where they like really annoying though it is.
If you want to have a chance of parking outside your house you need a disabled space although these are for anyone with a badge and not for a certain house to use. In the future your neighbours might move and a family with a 1 or 2 (or even more) cars may move in so better to get it sorted now.

Original poster
YNK · 14/07/2015 16:28

I did manouver effectively and my driving is excellent. Others objected to waiting!
I don't want it all ways, I only want to be able to get out of the house independently without inconveniencing anyone.
Perhaps I'm being paranoid but I'm very frightened - I stand to lose a lot.

This started because I wanted to leave someone lots of room to get in.

I will get on to the relevant people and see if I can arrange a space. No doubt this will take time but I will just suck it up, as they say.

OP posts: