Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

breastfeeding in the supermarket

426 replies

wtfisgoingonhere · 04/07/2015 18:51

Ok so I'm all for breastfeeding and think all mums should (assuming mother/baby are able to) but WALKING AROUND SAINSBURYS breastfeeding. . . Seriously? ?

Maybe it's only me that's shocked and I am not a mum myself if that makes a difference.
Don't get me wrong I certainly disagree with mums being ushered into toilets and the like but I felt a bit of modesty could have avoided awkwardness for both mum and others she may come across.

I have no issue with nudity either, i enjoy sunbathing topless and strolling around my home in various states of undress but I couldn't imagine ever feeling comfortable doing this myself

The last thing I expected on a Saturday afternoon trip to sainsburys was to round the corner of an aisle to come face to face with a woman with her top down and FULL BOOB OUT (I saw nipple and all!) strolling down the home entertainment aisle feeding baby. Yes I know this is what they are intended for but when men aren't allowed to enter shirtless is this not a bit much? Had she been sat outside the store on the benches or in a cafe (if they had one) I guess i or anyone else wouldn't have batted an eyelid

Just interested in others opinions

Is this taking things a bit far or perhaps it is just a multitasking achievement extraordinaire?

OP posts:
MistressDeeCee · 05/07/2015 10:15

I think this woman wanted to be stared at. Lots of people have that 15 mins of fame at all costs/people MUST look at me or hear me when Im out so Im going to be a bit outrageous to ensure they see me thing going on.

But tbh if Id walked into supermarket aisle and seen a woman breastfeeding I doubt it would even have registered with me, as something outrageous. & If I did register what she was doing it would be in a more "bloody hell, she's brave" kind of way.

I didnt spend my younger years in the UK and I find the attitude towards breasts here really weird at times. Really unrelaxed. Im more interested in HOW she could breastfeed whilst walking along AND thinking about her shopping lists and needs. Thats the ultimate in multi-tasking and time management she should probably be delivering inspirational workshops somewhere Grin

Klayden · 05/07/2015 10:17

I, too, didn't fail to see the irony in the OP justifying her desire to sunbathe topless. She said it was to avoid tan lines. Well, exposing an entire breast have a purpose too; to feed a child. That is far more important and natural than avoiding strap marks IMO.

Just wanted to add, having been a mother for 14 years, I rarely see a fully exposed breast of a woman feeding her child. I find it strange that people who have issues with public BFing have seen so many nipples and bare boobs in public. Maybe I just don't notice..?

Iggi999 · 05/07/2015 10:20

Elaine dfod. You are a dinosaur.

VacantExpression · 05/07/2015 10:21

I've breastfed while shopping before admittedly in Tescos not sainsburys because even though I fed DD just before and straight after the walk round the shop was too long for her to go without boob!

I am intrigued though as to how she was actually feeding if you could see nipple "and everything"? Some kind of nipple-catheter leading to baby or what?

vvega · 05/07/2015 10:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

53rdAndBird · 05/07/2015 10:24

They're not bare, though. There's a baby attached to them.

vvega · 05/07/2015 10:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dawndonnaagain · 05/07/2015 10:35
Especially you, Elaine Hmm
differentnameforthis · 05/07/2015 10:43

So what should mum have done on discovering her baby was hungry? Let it cry? Get distressed? So shoppers could have judged the mum for letting her baby cry?

Abandon her shopping?

No, she fed her child. I don't see the problem.

LegoComplex · 05/07/2015 11:06

good luck with expressing appleblossom.. the first month or so i was expressing constantly just due to the volume of milk, but i still could very rarely take expressed milk on a trip out because i was getting so engorged that missing a feed would have been agony (and very leaky! - freezer full of milk) now i've given my breastpump away as you reach a good level where you produce what you need so expressing would be a major hassle!

Eversobusyeveryday · 05/07/2015 11:07

I breast fed everywhere including supermarkets, airplanes, shops, restaurants etc etc many a time but at no point did I feel any need whatsoever to have an entire breast hanging out. I do think that there needs to be a level of respect and that includes not havjng your boobs entirely on display in the middle of the supermarket.

Maria33 · 05/07/2015 11:12

I think it's unusual to do this. My friend did it a lot though. I have absolutely no problem at all with people doing this. Breastfeeding isn't like eating three meals a day - there are days where the baby will be on and off all the time...
Do you have a problem with people drinking water from bottles as they walk round the shops? Maybe they ought to sit in the cafe while they do it?

Maria33 · 05/07/2015 11:29

I breastfed everywhere in the early 2000's and breastfed all 3 of my children into toddlerhood.
Apart from feeding my children, one of the loveliest things that has happened to me over the past 16 years is the succession of women who have said to me: "I remember you feeding dd at the Tate/ theatre/ swimming pool/ library etc and it really encouraged me to breastfeed my own babies."
I was not political about breast feeding; with my first, I had no idea there were any politics around it. I was just young and did what felt convenient. With women's breasts on every billboard in sight, it genuinely didn't occur to me that anyone would give a shit about seeing the top of my breast over a baby's head. I've revealed more breast in a skimpy dress than I ever have done breast feeding...
The OP may have been shocked in Sainsbury's and Appleblossom may believe that she'll never get her tits out on the bus. But I'm a few years from now, in a desperate moment, with a screaming baby in a public place, they may feel grateful to this legendary breastfeeding woman for broadening their horizons...
This is what the sisterhood's about Smile

Raveismyera · 05/07/2015 12:02

I don't believe the woman had her beast out

littlejohnnydory · 05/07/2015 18:37

You're entitled to your opinion Apple although it's more offensive than seeing someone feed a baby. Good luck excusing yourself and going into another room (you'll spend your whole visit there!) and good luck too with spending an hour extracting a tiny bit of milk only for baby to refuse the bottle. Expressing sounds like a solution but it's more faff than it's worth.

Dunkyourcustardcream · 05/07/2015 19:15

Wow, you really are shocked aren't you! To post a thread about it too. Don't watch the news will you, coz that might just tip you over the edge.

ThisIsClemFandango · 05/07/2015 19:19

I think people often think you can 'just express' before they have a baby. As pp have pointed out expressing can be more complicated than you realise.
I wouldn't myself express just to avoid feeding in public; I personally found having and caring for a baby enough to think about with enough to do rather than having to worry about that.
Breastfeeding needs to become normalised imho. And negative attitudes as expressed on this thread are not helpful.

Gymtortoise · 05/07/2015 20:31

Hmmm, that didn't work. Try:www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/11/breastfeeding-ruin-your-day-video_n_4769572.html

DesertIslander · 05/07/2015 21:22

I would say "good on you" to that woman

SnapesCapes · 05/07/2015 21:30

I breastfed everywhere we went because both DCs were chunkos who barely went 30 minutes without demanding to be fed. An older lady at our local ASDA stood up at the Pharmacy and gave me her chair so I could feed DS2 while we waited for a prescription. It's just milk, it's just a breast, and if you're so bothered by seeing it you might want to readjust your tit-o-meter and realise that breastfeeding women aren't doing it to spite or mortify or upset you. They're simply trying to feed their child.

My MIL insisted I go upstairs to feed the DCs when they were breastfeeding as it made her uncomfortable. I refused and she stopped visiting for a while. I'm almost tempted to have another solely for that reason.

VacantExpression · 05/07/2015 21:32

Your opinion is of course as valid as anyone elses Appleblossom but I will be very surprised if you manage successful breastfeeding whilst adhering to your plans, and if your need to sit covered up in corners puts a swift halt to your breast feeding in the future that would be a real shame.

Icimoi · 05/07/2015 21:44

I do think that there needs to be a level of respect and that includes not havjng your boobs entirely on display in the middle of the supermarket.

OP doesn't suggest that that is what this woman was doing, Eversobusyeveryday. She had one boob out to feed the baby, and much of it would have been covered by the baby's head. Even if the baby pulled away for a moment, the fact that her breast was visible for a few seconds in no way means she was lacking in "respect."

sleeponeday · 05/07/2015 22:56

appleblossom as someone who has had to exclusively express for one of mine, I know it's very hard work, uncomfortable, time-consuming and at times actually quite soul-destroying. And many women can harvest hardly any milk that way.

It's also nowhere near as good for the baby, because milk is effectively white blood. It's a living substance, and once expressed, it starts to die. It's also not the right temperature, not as sterile, and not served in a way all babies will take.

My youngest thought bottles were trying to kill her and screamed if anyone approached with one.

And whoever thought there was something wrong with breastfeeding toddlers... sorry, but I find that sort of phobic response to a normal, instinctive human behaviour deeply, deeply weird in itself. Average weaning age internationally is over 4 years old, and milk is not just about nutrition and immune support.

HopefulHamster · 05/07/2015 23:18

The one thing I would say appleblossom is that with expressing to feed in public, is that it can lead to your boobs missing a feed (while you're giving the expressed bottle), so that the next day your supply is reduced, so the next time you go out you give formula, and the more you give formula, the more your supply is reduced, etc.

Combined feeding can work for some, expressing for trips out can work - though doing it regularly is bit trickier, but while it can work, it can also damage the breastfeeding relationship in the early few weeks. So if you're only planning to bf the first couple of months, try not to express to feed too much. Or make sure when you get home you express again!

You might find that once you've done it for that long, it's as easy to keep going as to stop :)