To think everyone believes they look/feel/act younger then they are?
scalala · 02/07/2015 17:42
This probably goes more for those over 30 but it gets more noticable as you get older that everyone men and women all seem to think they are somehow especially "young" for their age. For example online dating which thankfully I don't need to use but which many of my friend do we are late 30's and a huge majority of men only want to be contacted by women their exact age or much younger as if a year or two older is like dating the crypt keeper. The argument they give is that they look and act much younger and so a women their age or older wouldn't be able to keep up with them or do the things they like to do gigs, traveling etc because they some how imagine women their age are all home darning socks and making stovies.
The truth is that women also often feel or imagine that the men their age seem a bit slow and tired and they feel they would prefer a younger, more energetic partner.
Another example I have a friend the same age as me who recentl told me she was looking forward to her high school reunion next year because she feels she has aged much better than her peers and still looks like a twenty something. I hardly knew what to say, she is beautiful but she looks every one of her 37 years and has plenty of deep lines and wrinkles she says they are just the same as when she was a child so not age related but they are the signs of ageing.
Everyone is always telling each other how young we look, it is the biggest compliment we can give and receive after 35 but so often it isn't really true! Also we all have different ideas of what youth means for some it is blonde hair and tan for others it is fitting into skinny jeans and for other it is all about skin quality. It is fine to get a boost or compliment a friend but it just perpetuates this who we have to look young to be worthy or attractive and it piles on the pressure to use various treatments.
Why not tell a friend that she looks glowing if her skin is good or that you admire her energy / fitness or the way she handles her problems with such grace and so on rather than the you look so young.
SqueezyCheeseWeasel · 02/07/2015 17:50
I know what you mean. I think it's partially flattery (the 'compliments' from others) and partially that we are judging from against what 35, 40, 45, 55 looked like a generation or two ago, when we were younger and our mothers or grandmothers were the same age rather than just realising that this is actually what 35/45/60 looks like these days and actually with better diets, a greater interest in 'healthy lifestyles', better skincare, better medical care and cosmetic surgery, we look younger/better/more 'fresh' than our parents/grandparents did.
Teabagbeforemilk · 02/07/2015 17:51
I feel younger than I am. Still shocks me when I realise I have so much responsibilty. It's not always a good thing.
I get old I look younger occasionally, but never take it seriously. I am wrinkle free as I get Botox done. But I don't think that makes me look in my twenties.
scalala · 02/07/2015 17:53
I do agree that probably every generation in the post war period has aged better than the on before. I think only now they are saying with kids now the trend is reversing a bit due to inactivity and obesity.
I think people need to accept that if they look younger than their mum when she was 40 that is just what 40 looks like these days also much of it is smoke and mirrors better clothes, better hair dye, styles etc, make up and so on. The only true test is skin quality up close often that isn't as good especially with the rise of the sunbed and package holiday.
wafflyversatile · 02/07/2015 18:05
I remember watching maybe the 2nd or 3rd series of big Brother and some 39 year old was in there. He claimed he was 39 going on 16. He was so youthful still. But he was clearly grumpy and disgusted with the youth he was sharing the house with and escaped over the wall a few days in. So childish, but not 'down wif the youth' like he thought he was.
lljkk · 02/07/2015 18:32
Can only comment about me.
Am pretty sure that most women my age or close to my age look very much younger than me, if I had to hazard a guess. I'm amazingly terrible at guessing ages of adults though.
I actually am fitter & slimmer & more active than most women near my age, & I act younger than many, I think. Not sure that's a good thing?!
ratsintheattic · 02/07/2015 18:49
actually if you find some photos of your mum/gran when they were in their forties you'll be shocked at how young they look (in terms of skin and figure and hair color). their clothes were hideous, of course. The point is they looked old before because we were so young. If you really want to know how young you look, ask a 19 year old. They'll soon put you straight.
Kvetch15 · 02/07/2015 18:55
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StarsInTheNightSky · 02/07/2015 18:59
Hahaha I wish! These days I am usually mistaken for being at least ten years older that I am, and I do look it, primarily due to ill health. It doesn't bother me that much, though it is mildly amusing to see people turn red and stammer when I reveal my age, but I'm evil like that
NoelHeadbands · 02/07/2015 19:14
Hmm I don't think I act, or look any younger than my 40 years.
I look younger than my mum did at 40, but there are many factors involved there.
I think I probably look like a nicely kept mid forties, but not any younger- I've always looked older than I am, even as a young teen. I think it's because I have strong bone structure- though I don't look as 'hard faced' as I used to, and now at least the cheekbones are scaffolding the rest of the face
I don't feel I act any younger than I am. My children are no longer tinies- whilst my eldest has just finished his GCSE's, some of my (same age) friends children haven't even started school, so I guess there's a difference there? I'm no way an old fuddy duddy yet, but at the same time, I'm not doing the shenanigans I got up to in my earlier years!
As far as feeling goes- well yes, I got to 13 and then I stopped
Tuskerfull · 02/07/2015 19:15
I'm the opposite. I always felt like I skipped my teenage years and went straight to adult - not really in maturity, but in terms of behaviour and my ability to relate to people my own age. It's my birthday tomorrow and people at work keep asking how old I'll be and then are very surprised when I tell them, as they guessed I was older. I'll be 26 so it's not an insult... I don't think!
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