People who are doing it WRONG

[GloGirl]

My Dad loves to talk about how he enjoys a good barbecue in this weather, once he even invited a lot of family round for one.

His version of a BBQ is a George Formby grill (natch), and in nice weather he plugs it in outside to cook a burger or sausage on. He is quite evangelical about how clever it is to barbecue that way.

It gives me the gritted teeth rage.

Anyone else who is doing it ALL WRONG? Offload here

lweji
"Please tell me something"

This reminds me of my DS. He used to start every conversation with "Mum, can I ask you something?"
Me: What?
Him: We had baked beans for dinner at school today.

My mum also used to say "Something funny/sad/weird happened this week, I must tell you about it in a minute", then witter on about something dull, like my second cousin's driving lesson saga, then when I would say "So what's the funny/sad/weird thing then?" She'd say "Oh, I can't remember now."

If you don't do it my way, yer doin it RONG.

Yes, I am the authority on everything and how it should be done.

Bathing in salad cream is marginally less wrong than actually ingesting it!

This sentence starter is wrong -

With the greatest respect..... (usually means opposite)

I only put butter on scones.

I don't like cream and not so fond of jam (I have some jars fossilizing in the fridge - and before you tell me they are fine outside, if they were not in the fridge they would be rotten by now, seriously. I may end up freezing them too)
I love butter, on the other hand.
But I'm not British and I don't care.
Ah!

Littleham - so guilty of that! Other classic irritaiting phrases I use include:

'I'm not being funny but,'

'At the end of the day'

'If you know what I mean'

One that gets my goat - 'something something, and all that jazz'. Are you currently touring with the musical Chicargo? No?! Then stop it!!!

Chicago - not Chicargo

..dont get me wrong
Im not being funny - then they critique something or someone
Reverse back, you use one or the other.
One i use too much, back in the day. As is it was far better in my day. Probably wasn't

Remember that Swedish mobile phone company that suddenly folded a few years back?
My Dad always called them Noe-kia. It always gave me the rage.

Potatoes last AGES if you keep them in the fridge and onions don't make your eyes water when you cut them if they're cold. YABU

Nokia is still around. I was looking at some phones the other day. They have a Windows system.

What people do wrong:
give it >100%. Just no
parking - most people where I live. Sigh.
turning around perfectly regular bends or junctions by going all the other way, then turning the opposite way - you are not a lorry, nor an F1 driver.

Nokia were great.

I still have one of these at home working perfectly (but not getting any use), even if the screen is cracked a bit.

Give it 110 percent! Even 'wronger'

give it >100% includes all the variations above 100% :), including the million and so on... Simon Cowell and deranged talent contest juries!

Nokia are definitely still around. I still have one of their old bricks, it's our spare phone of anyone loses theirs. Battery life lasts more than a week, ds would rather eat his own arm than use it though !

Dh says 'Go and wash your teeth' to ds. WRONG!!!! His whole family say it.

An ex-boyfriend's family used to have bread & butter with EVERY meal. He (boyfriend) used to pile mashed potato (Smash, actually) on the bread & butter. Vile. Oh, & it was marg as well. Double vile.

Sorry, your right. Simon was terrible for this, louis was always ' your a little Kylie / Robbie/ Chesney hawkes' when they were not at all. All wrong

Susiella, you dodged a bullet there

Nokia are Finnish aren't they?

But I don't think they have finished

Chicago - not Chicargo

But Frank Sinatra sings that. I know he wasn't from Chicago, but it was a huge hit, how can I be expected to know how to say it?

How do you say it?

I do realise it's not pronounced Noooo Yorrrk, though.

Chic ah go

Is that emphasis on Chic and the rest said separately but quickly?

That's the best way I can describe it because I don't understand how the pronunciation guides with upside-down letters and things in dictionaries. I wish I did.

I think it's meant to be Noo-CASSELL but I always feel a bit of a fraud because I'm a southerner who says Noooo-Carsell.

I know how to say Hawick and Alnick but only because DH goes to the first for work and I went to the second on holiday.

It's Hoyck and Annick.

In Essex we have traps too. It's Theydon Boys not Bwoir. Some of us know to pronounce Beauchamp as Beechamp because we're got some B villages too, twinned with the Knightsbridge street beloved of Princess Diana.

And Plaistow.

How to say Plaistow.

Finnish?
Whoops. He was still saying it wrong. It's Nok-ia Nok-ia.
My Dad would sometimes eat crisps with a knife and fork too. My mum would also get him to cook the meat at a barbeque. He can't cook. If you can't fry a steak on a job, you can't cook meat on a barbeque.
He would also tell me not to go out without my coat as I might catch a chill.
Argh!