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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Not to be able to unpack a house with a 4 year old and baby?!

41 replies

lill72 · 29/06/2015 10:44

Ah - we have just moved house and I am keen to get it sorted ASAP - though it is seemingly impossible with a baby to do more than 5 minute stints of work. Even when my 4 year old is in nursery all day, it is virtually impossible. I have no family to help, so currently looking into a childminder a friend uses, as I need DD oout of the house to do the unpacking. Mega frustrating. Any suggestions from anyone who has been in a similar position?

OP posts:

Artandco · 29/06/2015 10:46

Can you just put baby in sling and unpack most whilst 4 year old is at nursery? Leave toys etc and get 4 year old to help you when home.

struckwithindecision · 29/06/2015 10:49

I remember well loving house with a 6 week old and 22 month old. I did all the unpacking and packing. From what I remember c beebies helped and a dummy for the baby. I'm not sure how I did it but I manged it somehow.

struckwithindecision · 29/06/2015 10:50

Managed it. Or maybe I did mange it. Would explain a lot!

BrianButterfield · 29/06/2015 10:50

How old is baby?

formerbabe · 29/06/2015 10:53

I have been in exactly your position op! I remember sitting amongst the boxes and sobbing thinking it would never get done! If you can afford childcare, then go for it...or otherwise do you have a travel cot...put it in whichever room you are doing and put your baby in there with some toys while you unpack.

RichardInBermuda · 29/06/2015 10:53

You have my sympathy. I have a baby and a 4 year old. Were moving back to the UK. We have to sell everything including the kids toys then fly back and buy everything needed for a house (that's going to be one hell of a trip to ikea.)

Good luck, keep going and cross your fingers you can get childcare.

DeeWe · 29/06/2015 10:59

We moved when ds was about 18 months. 18 months is the worst age as they get into everything and anything you're sorting they "sort" too, and they're not safe to leave on their own. The 4yo you should be able to leave with CBeeBies or get to do small but helpful jobs.

We had a whole room piled floor to ceiling with stuff that needed sorting.

I just did it slowly. So he'd go down for a rest and I'd aim at doing one box.

I remember the first day just looking at the room and thinking that I didn't even know where to start. I couldn't even properly get into the room. Once I'd done three or four boxes it started feeling possible, but I think those first few seemed ridiculous I was even bothering to start!

It's a bit of "how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time." Because you can't do much at a time, and it seems ages before you feel you've made an impact. But actually I'd cleared the room much quicker than I (or dh) thought would happen. It was still probably around a month before it was clear.

Original poster

lill72 · 29/06/2015 10:59

Thank you! Baby is 8 months and I can't put her down for more than five minutes, as nothing holds her attention. A sling is tricky as I don;t think I could reach into boxes. DD also likes me to be standing while she is in one.
TV does not hold her attention at this stage. Childcard only way to go. so depressing - I can't even fold the washing right now!!!

Good luck with the move back to the UK. We moved here a few years
ago and put everything into storage - that was huge and there were no kids.

OP posts:

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 29/06/2015 11:02

What about one of those baby bouncer things? Not the doorway ones, the obscenely irritating things that play music and make lots of noise. It was a life saver with DD2. You can only use for 10-15 mins at a time but at least she will be vertical and you can unload a box in 15 mins and put some stuff away?

Mothers help for a few hours a day should help too?

blink1552 · 29/06/2015 11:09

Can your DP take some leave?

Live on ready meals and take it easy in the day, and focus your efforts on unpacking in the evening.

It's worth training the baby up to tolerate a few mins playing in her cot, or in a travel cot set up as a playpen, but it would only buy you a few mins here and there.

Artandco · 29/06/2015 11:36

At 8 months, I would put baby in a large box! With smaller boxes and random safe things to play with. They are contained and novelty play. Move box around as needed

fiorentina · 29/06/2015 12:07

Can you not make it into a game for them. Pans to bang, boxes to play with if its safe etc. make them a hidey hole den? Or just do it in the evening when your DH is back and you can get it sorted.

WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 29/06/2015 12:14

I feel your pain, we moved once when DD was 6 months and again when she was 15 months. Have to say 6 months was easier as she wasn't crawling then! 15 months was a bloody nightmare. DH was out work so it is we all down to me. 4 months on and we still have boxes everywhere, and DC2 is due next week!

TheHormonalHooker · 29/06/2015 12:20

I moved house with a 4 month old, then again when he was 9 months old, then again with a 2yr old and a 9 month old.

The baby got put in a bouncy chair with some toys etc and was next to me unpacking/putting away whatever needed doing. I sang, talked to them etc while I carried on. It just had to be done.

Mutley77 · 29/06/2015 12:47

Speed is my only advice. We relocated overseas 2 years ago and recently then had to move with an 18mo, 6 year old and 10 year old in tow (school holidays for the older two). Tbh the actual unpacking was no problem. Once the boxes arrived at new house we had about six hours where the children were still with friends and dh and I just blitzed it! The Dc came home around dinner time (take away) and the older two helped finish off their own bedrooms. Once the youngest was in bed we had another few hours before we were ready for bed by which time we were pretty much done. We had arranged to move on a Friday so then had the weekend where we could tag team with the toddler verses unpacking the last bits and setting up.

I think you are over thinking it. Knuckle down for a day and it will be done

CrispyFB · 29/06/2015 13:00

Just coming out the other side of this - DS is four and the baby was about 14 months. We have two older ones too - 6 and 8, and they were more of a hindrance than a help.

Basically usually one of us watched the children whilst the other got on with it, there was no other way. Even now we still have about 10% of the boxes to unpack, six weeks later.

Most of it was done after they'd gone to sleep - there were a lot of late nights.

toomuchtooold · 29/06/2015 13:27

Moved abroad at Christmas with 2.5yo twins. Moving again in August. I've just accepted that there are certain things in boxes that I will never see until they go to school. And I don't mean books and ornaments, I'm talking about things like clothes and cooking utensils.

HelenaJustina · 29/06/2015 13:31

Can you find/advertise for a local teenager to look after the baby in the house while you unpack?

University students are back on vacation, GCSE and A-level students have mostly finished exams I think. They would be cheaper than a childminder/nanny/crèche and you would be in the house so not leaving her with someone you don't know.

NobodyLivesHere · 29/06/2015 13:34

I moved house with 3 under 4s. You just crack on with it.

NobodyLivesHere · 29/06/2015 13:36

Put the baby in a box with some random objects.

budgiegirl · 29/06/2015 13:54

I moved house with a 6 week old and an 18 month toddler. I don't remember it being too bad, just don't sweat the small stuff, and have takeaways for a few days.

babybat · 29/06/2015 14:46

Could you try taskrabbit.com or Gumtree or similar to find someone to help you unpack? Maybe a student who'd be happy to do a couple of hours for a reasonable amount of money?

FilbertSnood · 29/06/2015 14:50

Get someone from sitters.co.uk to take 8 month old while you unpack. I guess the 8 month old naps? Blitz it then?

Wibblypiglikesbananas · 29/06/2015 15:34

Total sympathy. We have moved a lot over the last few years (abroad and then within that country) and each time we've had a baby, a baby and me pregnant, or a baby and a toddler. It is tough. Last time we gave in and got MIL to come over for a week as there was no way we could have done it otherwise. Your partner needs to help too.

missymayhemsmum · 29/06/2015 21:06

Playpen for the baby. Cbeebies. Do a room at a time then decamp.
Or allow the 4 year old to build a den/ house/ camp with the boxes- he only gets a new box when you empty it, and reward him for amusing the baby so you can.

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