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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to be disappointed that the new CEO of the NCT is a man?

368 replies

ArcheryAnnie · 26/06/2015 23:29

The new CEO of the NCT is due to start work shortly - a man, Nick Wilkie.

The NCT's mission is to support parents during pregnancy, birth and early childhood. Their line re the new CEO is that men can be parents, but my line is that it's only women who get pregnant and give birth.

There are many, many senior, suitably qualified women in the UK who could perform this role. Furthermore, from my experience with the NCT, all the events I went to, it was women who do most of the work. I'm tired of organisations where women make up the majority of the volunteers, or the workers, but where a man is the CEO. I didn't expect it of the NCT.

AIBU to feel massively disappointed that the NCT are putting a man in charge?

OP posts:
Andrewofgg · 27/06/2015 15:52

Sleepless That would make an amazing cartoon!

Grin
SleeplessButNotInSeattle · 27/06/2015 16:22

Andrew, I would fear for the cartoonists' safety though...

The following is on the NCT website, I couldn't find their core values online. But every candidate's ability to support their goal would gave been assessed. And the focus seems to be parents and children rather than women. If you disagree with the NCT's goal nowadays, that's a different matter. But they've picked the best person to achieve that goal.

Vision, mission and goal

Our vision is a world in which parents are valued and supported to build a strong society, believing that a child’s early years significantly impact upon the future they help to shape.

Mission statement

NCT is an advocate, guide and friend for parents through their First 1,000 Days.

Goal

Making NCT services accessible to parents, meeting their needs and influencing on behalf of all parents.

Sansarya · 27/06/2015 16:23

As has been said many times, NCT is no longer an organisation about childbirth - it was in the past but now calls itself Britain's largest parenting charity. Nor does it campaign on a significant scale anymore. The campaigns department was disbanded a few years ago.

irregularegular · 27/06/2015 16:25

I'm having a little trouble articulating exactly why I think this is a good thing. I certainly don't think that a man should be favoured over a woman by virtue of his gender any more than I think a woman should be favoured over a man. Nor - obviously- do I think something is only important if men are interested in it!

However, there may be many men out there who think that the NCT and the issues it is concerned with is "women's stuff" that need not concern them in any way. As a side effect of appointing a talented and experienced man to this job, some of those men may start to see the issues as being of wider concern. And that must be a good thing, presumably?

Conversely, the fact that talented and experienced men are interested in this job indicates that this process has already started. Which presumably is also a good thing?

Am I the only one who thinks this? Would everyone else prefer a world where men see parenting as "women's stuff" and wouldn't dream of applying for a job in the area?

irregularegular · 27/06/2015 16:29

And yes there is a major problem with the number of women in senior positions. But I don't think that identifying particular positions as being only suitable for women is helpful to the general cause.

morage · 27/06/2015 16:31

If it was a man getting a lower paid job or volunteering I would agree. But generally it is women volunteering and doing low paid jobs, and the men get the management jobs.

irregularegular · 27/06/2015 16:34

Having read the thread since I first posted I now see I'm not alone.

TTWK · 27/06/2015 16:53

So you would all be happy with an organisation for black people, with a white CEO at the head of it?

Who gives a stuff. If Richard Branson offered to head up the Sickle Cell Anaemia charity, I bet they'd bite his fucking arm off!

DH's beer company didn't believe that. They expect their CEO to actually drink their beer, not just to have a good attitude to it.

Well with respect, he works for a firm of idiots. I'm a friend of the the former CEO of a global tobacco company, and he has never smoked. He was incredibly successful in the roll.

Sansarya · 27/06/2015 17:04

The analogy of a white CEO heading an organisation for black people isn't exactly the best one as parents are both male and female.

TTWK · 27/06/2015 17:12

The analogy of a white CEO heading an organisation for black people isn't exactly the best one as parents are both male and female

It's a bad analogy as it isn't true. As I pointed out above, any black organisation, especially a charity, would be delighted to have a white CEO, if they were a superior candidate to any of the black people applying, and could increase the profile and the flow of money into the charity.

Sansarya · 27/06/2015 17:23

Sorry but no, I highly doubt a charity for POC would appoint a white CEO as they would need to have someone who could empathise with and understand what it is to be a POC.

In the case of Nick Wilkie, he appears to have worked with families, diverse communities and taken time off work to be a SAHP - something that would qualify him to be CEO of a parenting charity.

TheHumblePotato · 27/06/2015 17:33

As I pointed out above, any black organisation, especially a charity, would be delighted to have a white CEO, if they were a superior candidate to any of the black people applying, and could increase the profile and the flow of money into the charity

"Superior candidate to any of the black people applying" I'm not on the PC brigade task force TTWK but please choose your words carefully.

I have no reason to think that a man's appointment to the NCT is a bad thing, in fact I think it could prove very useful. Similarly to organisations that represent a certain cause for a certain demographic, if their CEO had no personal relation to the cause I'd see it as a good thing as it would provide an opportunity to widen the reach of said cause.

tobysmum77 · 27/06/2015 17:45

erm 'if they were a superior candidate' let's quote it correctly instead of twisting words.

TheHumblePotato · 27/06/2015 17:45

WRT would everyone be okay with a white person heading up an organisation to promote the rights of black individuals, a few things IMO: I am of mixed heritage. My point does not reflect those with similar backgrounds nor does it give credence to the cause.

I agree with the poster upthread who pointed out the 'whataboutery' argument as we could spend the rest of eternity debating about 'others' and seeking to root out those who seemingly have it worse or indeed more deserving.

I would certainly welcome a white CEO in any organisation fighting for the rights of any ethnic minority groups and I certainly think if we begin to divide 'ownership' of these issues that affect society as a whole we'll end up back in the dark ages.

TTWK · 27/06/2015 17:46

"Superior candidate to any of the black people applying" I'm not on the PC brigade task force TTWK but please choose your words carefully.

Why? We're talking about the possibility of a white person getting the job of leading a black organisation where one assumes most of the applicants will be black. A range of candidates apply for any job, one of them will be the superior candidate. He/she may be black/white/ mixed race/ Asian/ Chinese/native American or Inuit. Please don't read into my post a white supremacy theme where there isn't one.

TheHumblePotato · 27/06/2015 17:50

Yes tobysmum77 Do you mean I should quote it in its entirety like I had already done in that exact post? Or do you mean just add an extra few preambles? I am not twisting words hence my quoting the whole post.

So let's take it again toby in your vision:

if they were a superior candidate to any of the black people applying, and could increase the profile and the flow of money into the charity

Turns out my point still stands.

Wideopenspace · 27/06/2015 17:51

The real issue is that only 3% of CEOs in FT reporting companies are women.

It is a terribley patriarchal world out there..

Sansarya · 27/06/2015 17:54

One thing that just struck me as ironic is that the new NCT CEO states on LinkedIn (and presumably his CV) that he took a year off to parent, while doing occasional part-time work. How many women would put the same on their CVs without fearing that they'd instantly be passed over in favour of a candidate who hadn't taken time off for maternity leave? Very few I'm guessing.

NotJustaPotforSoup · 27/06/2015 17:55

When I first read the op, I agreed wholeheartedly. I've been pondering all afternoon and have changed my mind.

I hope he embraces the parenting remit of his organisation and focuses on getting more men fully engaged, including taking plenty of paternity leave, exploring being a Sahp properly rather than only when they can't escape the fact that the numbers don't stack up, reading about and applying the parenting methods that suit them and their children, and moving beyond the mother as default carer.

He could make a massive difference if he tackled that stuff and I'd be massively behind him.

TheHumblePotato · 27/06/2015 17:59

One would not assume that "most of the applicants will be black" regarding a job for the head of a group designed to empower black individuals. In fact I'd hazard a guess that 'most applicants' will stem from the majority population of that nation be they White, Black, Chinese, Indian...

It's not about the select group who are deemed worthy of applying, it is to do with the law of averages as such in England, there are more likely to be White men, or indeed women applying for such a job. I'm not turning your post into some sort of supremacy theme but words matter. It is all we have to go on here. And language like that is divisive.

LaVolcan · 27/06/2015 18:00

When maternity care in this country is in such a mess, that makes no sense. There should be at least one organisation in the country lobbying for a much better deal for women.

I fully agree with you morage. The NCT, if it's now more about parenting, should change its title to the NPT. This would give room for another organisation wholly devoted to pregnancy and childbirth to start up. There is more than enough room for both.

(Just remembered, there is AIMS, who perhaps fulfil the role about campaigning for change.)

Enkopkaffetak · 27/06/2015 18:03

I havent read everything on this thread However.

The NCT has for many years been moving away from childbirth and breastfeeding to go to parenting. Their tag line is "helping you become the parent you want to be" They want to be seen as a parenting charity not Childbirth/breastfeeding.

Hence it doesnt surprise me that it is a male CEO who was appointed.

Belinda left the NCT in October 2014 I worked with her for many years and I have nothing but positive to say about her. She in my experience is wonderful to work with. I wish her nothing but the very best forward. Actually rather surprised so many view her so negatively.

I myself left the NCT in 2013 I had prior to that been involved with the charity both as a volunteer and a paid worker for 15 years.

As for is it unreasonable. I am unsurprised - I suspected it may happen, as they do want to be seen as a parenting charity and a male at the lead would help make this point better than a female I suspect would be their view. I think that for a parenting charity its reasonable to have a man as CEO..

WinterOfOurDiscountTents15 · 27/06/2015 18:06

When maternity care in this country is in such a mess, that makes no sense. There should be at least one organisation in the country lobbying for a much better deal for women

And what is about having a penis that means one can't do just that? I campaign for all sorts of things that don't personally affect me, its a piss poor metric for whether you're any good at it.

LaVolcan · 27/06/2015 18:12

Winter - it's more that the NCT have changed their focus, and aren't really campaigning for childbirth improvements anymore.

RedToothBrush · 27/06/2015 18:49

As I said before the male midwife I dealt with who was a trustee of the NCT was one of the most passionate and committed individuals you could hope to meet. He was a real champion for women and women being treated as individuals. He lectured on the subject to the RCM and the like.

But hell because he's a man he couldn't possibly be interested in the subject or as good as a woman...

... BOLLOCKS!

BIG FAT HAIRY ONES.

Well they clearly seem to be the objectionable thing to a lot of people on this thread