DS is 2 so schools haven't really been on our radar yet. But the local primary is rated Outstanding so we just assumed he'd go there in due course.
This afternoon we met some friends at a park at 4pm. The park is close both to the state primary and local prep but is not one we usually go to (and we normally avoid parks at school turning out time).
The park is big but was packed with school children most of whom looked about 7 or younger, so was pretty chaotic. Most of the kids were dressed in polos and shorts or summer dresses and looked pretty much the same. However I rapidly realized that the children in one uniform were generally behaving far better than the others, so I looked at the uniforms to see which schools the kids attended.
There was a lot of pushing and shoving between the primary school kids, and one was utterly foul mouthed. These kids were also the ones who tried to shove the toddlers out of the way on the climbing frame, were clambering the wrong way up the slide, not waiting their turn or yelling at/pushing my DS and his friends if they tried to go in the play house. They took no notice of me when I suggested they wait. One picked up my son's toy and pulled the string so hard he broke it, then just chucked it down and ran off laughing. Obviously they weren't all like this, but a significant number were.
In contrast, the prep school kids we met were universally respectful and friendly to the toddlers, waiting their turn and not sliding into the child in front, one said sorry when he ran into my buggy and they generally seemed to be playing much more nicely together and have more social awareness.
AIBU to want to send my DS private after witnessing this or am I just not used to 4-7 year olds and this is normal? Ive looked on the prep school website and we could just about afford it if we scrimped and saved.
AIBU?
AIBU to want to send my DC to private school after seeing kids in park?
Fishnchipsagain · 24/06/2015 19:16
I've read this thread with fascination. With the obvious exceptions I think most people are pretty balanced on this.
I visit a lot of schools via my job. I run and host author/literary/illustration events/workshops. I've travelled all over the country from Southern England to North Scotland - state and private. I know my experiences aren't a 'normal' school day, but I can honestly say that in all schools the behaviour of the children has been fantastic and they've all been very knowledgable about books and reading.
The most stressful visits has been one state primary where no technical equipment worked and the head teacher was rather rude, and 2 private schools where the teachers were stressed about me being 'off timetable' and a few awkward private school teachers who refused to follow the agreed classroom brief.
Basically what I'm saying is that I've found no huge difference in confidence, eloquence, enthusiasm, speaking and obvious IQ levels in either state or private schools.
Funniest thing was in a a really expensive private school in Bath, a year2 boy announced out of the blue while discussing his drawing that his Dad was in prison and mummy won't see him! Teacher looked really embarrassed and swiftly moved on - but then, when my dcs started their state primary the mother stood next to me in the playground had a tag on
No, Bertrand, I really don't, because that would be to ignore the many lovely kids who go to them. I went to state school myself, my dh is deputy head of a comprehensive and my kids will go there. When I talk about the amazing difference I saw when I worked in a private school, people tend to assume that I'm a private school educated snob who looks down on oiks who go to comps. But that really isn't the case. I think that the knee-jerk, outraged 'Well MY children certainly don't behave like that! 'reaction when we talk about poorly-behaved kids in schools is one of the things which makes it harder to address the problem.
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