To want the same relationship with mil as I have with my own dm?

[IUseAnyName]

I have a great relationship with my mum. As I've gotten older we have become more friends than mother/daughter. We don't have loads in common and we live quite far away (3hrs) from eachother. I think the reason why we have a good relationship is because we're not intrusive towards eachother's lives. We chat maybe once a month, text a few times a month and I regularly send photo updates of the kids.
My mil on the otherhand feels the need to call me (yes me! Not oh, her ds) atleast once every couple days for a chat. She also lives 3hrs away. The convo is very limited as not much changes in a couple days and the usual questions are about the weather, school & kids. She sends many texts (no 2 days go by without one), about things we should do, such as ideas she's had about our garden/bedroom etc. I'm growing to resent her.
She's nice and we get on but I don't need to talk to her all the time.... I do also send her regular photo updates of kids.
Once a month would be nice :)
My dh has risen this with her as I feel cheeky if I say anything. But we don't know how to say it politely, which means oh makes a joke out of it, meaning it falls on deaf ears!
Aibu?.... Should I just suck it ip?

Yanbu. That would annoy me too. I would back off from answering the phone and replying to texts. It sounds like her behaviour is intrusive and annoying.

I speak to my mum every day, some times more, and we have bags to talkabout. RReplying "not much" when you're asked what you've been up to sounds to me like deliberately shutting down the conversation... your mil is a person too so chat about what you saw on telly, or that little one fell over or learnt to ride their bike. I've just been talking to my mum about the deals in Morrisons. It ssounds like she wants to be involved in those banal details

V glad I have girls as being "The Mother in Law" seems hard work - they cant really win can they?!

i thought this thread would be very different!
op, your mil sounds lonely and your dh should step up and phone her a lot more than he does. i dont ever really speak in the phone to my mil. she is not a friend or my family in my eyes, up to dh or the kids to keep in touch. in that sense i am quite 'hands off' i suppose
i speak to my own parents pretty much daily

I talk to my parents once a fortnight or so - that's enough. Sometimes we go a month without a chat. We don't text, email or send photos - so we're at least as "bad" as you!

DP talks to his about the same amount. I rarely talk to his (unless for specific advice/making plans) and he rarely talks to mine.