Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

MNHQ have commented on this thread

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 16 17

MNHQ have commented on this thread

AIBU?

if you can't afford the children you have you shouldn't have more?

401 replies

Lady1nred · 04/06/2015 16:24

was speaking to a couple I know today, both out of work and living on benifits. They have 3 children and they are very vocal about how awful it is that they barely get enough money to survive. It turn out that she is now pregnant with their 4th child! This was planned and they are delighted?! They use food banks and thir children have every gadget and toy known to man!

When I asked how on earth they will manage with another child she blatantly said the money they recieve will go up and that it is her right to have as many children as she likes?!!

I have 2DC, I would love a 3rd but we would struggle finNcislly so have made the decision not to. I believe benifits should be capped at 2 children, she obviously doesn't agree! If she can't afford to pay for the children she has why should I go without yet pay for hers through my taxes? AIBU?

OP posts:

Report

Rainicorn · 04/06/2015 17:16

Indeed.

if you can't afford the children you have you shouldn't have more?

Niloufes · 04/06/2015 17:16

what is the thing with the goats?

Lady1nred · 04/06/2015 17:19

Worra you don't have to bite that wasn't the point of it I was just interested to see if anyone shared my opinion on it. I know them very well and I know their situation. She isn't saving face, it was planned. Obviously they don't have every toy known to man but I'm sure you know what I mean, if I'd known it was going to be taken literally i would have written a list, I don't have the time or inclination so I'll just say they have a lot? Like I said I know her well so she wouldn't bat an eyelid at me asking her that, I wasn't being nosey? and finally no, I certainly wouldn't advocate children being taken away from their parents ... Just that the parents don't get paid to have them when they are not earning!t phew

Mistress I know about their financial situation because they choose to tell me, I'm their friend so why not. I have no idea about the food bank thing but I know they have used it more than 3 times but could certainly get by without it.

Anyway, it's been an eye opener guys, thanks I'd better take my twatty ass off and have some dinner ... and pick up all the popcorn that been flung at my goat or whatever

OP posts:

overmydeadbody · 04/06/2015 17:20

Well OP I think you have a point.

Ideally everyone should work and support themselves and any dependants. Also, ideally, people should stop at two regardless of how much money they have. The world has enough people already. Reality doesn't work like that though. No point getting worked up about it.

VodkaJelly · 04/06/2015 17:20

I got made redundant last month, full time, paid tax and NI for over 15 years. Now I need help with JSA and tax credits it should be capped at 2 kids? I have 3 kids, i had them, and could afford them because I worked.

Now I am on hard times my benefits should be capped? Great, if I knew that 15 years ago i would have refused to pay my tax (i wish!)

I have paid into the system, I should get full benefits, regardless of how many kids i have

WinterOfOurDiscountTents15 · 04/06/2015 17:20

Who cares? If true, then people like this are a tiny minority that you have to put up with in order to make sure that the majority has the welfare safety net necessary.
There are much bigger wastes of money out there.

Pumpeedo · 04/06/2015 17:24

My husband I both work up to 70 hours per week each to support our two children. We don't receive child benefit. Why should benefits be paid for any children, Lady1nred?

If you can't be nice about people then don't listen to their news. You sound two faced.

WorraLiberty · 04/06/2015 17:25

Wait a minute, you say you're their friend???

I certainly wouldn't advocate children being taken away from their parents...Just that the parents don't get paid to have them when they are not earning!

So tell me how the kids would be clothed and fed once they've actually been born?

DownWithThisTypeOfThing · 04/06/2015 17:25

Sorry, I'm fairly new to this didn't know there were other posts about it! My bad!

Sounds genuine to me

ollieplimsoles · 04/06/2015 17:30

Ugh, who gives a shit how many kids she thinks its her right to have.

Its shes happy relying on food banks to feed her ever growing family and living on benefits then let her get on with it.

MrsDeVere · 04/06/2015 17:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pumpeedo · 04/06/2015 17:31

If you're their friend then I'd hate to see a post from their enemy.

ghostyslovesheep · 04/06/2015 17:32

no me neither Mrs D

may we both be deleted !

it's fishier than a mermaids bathing suit this story

MrsDeVere · 04/06/2015 17:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ollieplimsoles · 04/06/2015 17:34

Maybe the OP is from DM or something- looking for material and opinions??

SonceyD0g · 04/06/2015 17:37

Niloufes I don't understand the goats either.
I actually do want a goat and a donkey!
Sorry if it's offensive I had no idea.
What goes around comes around. You have a child cos you think you can afford it next thing you know you have no job and claiming benefits. It's not what I would have done but we don't live in a dictatorship yet. So if that's their choice.

Signlake · 04/06/2015 17:41

I don't receive benefits (thank god with all the disgusting comments everywhere about those that do) and I just can't get bothered by this. As long as the children are well looked after, I couldn't care less

TwinkieTwinkle · 04/06/2015 17:43

Why are threads like this so hated?! It's not benefits bashing. It's a particular situation that the OP knows about and is (rightly in my opinion) niggled about. If she started an 'All families on benefits are scroungers' thread then fire away with taking her to task. That's not what she started though.

MistressMerryWeather · 04/06/2015 17:45

Because they never make any sense Twinkie.

morelikeguidelines · 04/06/2015 17:45

Please someone come back and explain about the goat!

TwinkieTwinkle · 04/06/2015 17:48

What do you mean they never make sense? In what way? There are people out there who abuse the system. I know of at least two myself. Why shouldn't the OP be allowed to complain about it on here? I've never quite understood why people instantly think these threads are trolls. Then again, I'm fairly new,

BelindaBear · 04/06/2015 17:49

Agree with op. Knew someone who had five kids. Her and her dh lived off benefits the entire time

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Theknacktoflying · 04/06/2015 17:50

Don't we all live on benefits??

I think this is more to do with the fact that this family is taking more out of the pot that what the OP feels is justifiable.

Just because you can doesn't make it right

lizabeth0607 · 04/06/2015 17:51

Honestly, whatever happened to live and let live? Who cares? You pay taxes regardless of where they physically end up. Think of the children.

MistressMerryWeather · 04/06/2015 17:53

I think MrsD's posts lined out exactly why these threads never make any sense.

No point in repeating.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 16 17

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.