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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think £40 is not too much to put in a wedding card?

97 replies

Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:38

Going to the evening reception of a wedding tonight. Dp wants to put £20 in card, I say £40.
It was a small wedding ceremony and I've known the bride a couple of years. I think £20 would probably just cover what she's spending on feeding us and feel £40 is better to give.
How much do you guys put in cards (when they've asked for money instead of gifts)
Th

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Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:38

Thanks*

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TheOriginalWinkly · 04/06/2015 14:40

£20 is plenty for an evening guest. I didn't ask for or expect gifts from evening guests.

MrsEricBana · 04/06/2015 14:41

I think put what you can afford but I would say £40 more appropriate yes.

lipsynch · 04/06/2015 14:41

£40

mynewpassion · 04/06/2015 14:41

Good friends I would do 40.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 04/06/2015 14:43

Probably depends on how much disposable income you have. I agree that £20 would only cover the costs of having you there, but they're not selling tickets. They've invited you because presumably they want you to attend so you can give whatever you like. I think I'd probably give £30 or £40.

MaxPepsi · 04/06/2015 14:43

It depends.

We generally put £20 in for an evening reception.

SomethingAboutNothing · 04/06/2015 14:43

I had this discussion with my DH recently. After talking to another friend going to the wedding we agreed £30, but I don't think £20 is unreasonable.

Siarie · 04/06/2015 14:44

We usually do £100 for a wedding gift but lots of people have asked this before and basically it depends on how much you personally want to give. Whatever you can afford, out of the two options you've given I'd say £40 if you are good friends.

SlightlyJaded · 04/06/2015 14:44

I know I will get flamed for this but yes, £20 is a bit tight. Not for any other occasion, but for a wedding - yes £40 is more appropriate.

BumWad · 04/06/2015 14:45

£20-£30

Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:46

She's a friend of a friend- but I'm turn my friend if that makes sense. We wouldn't spend time alone together but I'm part of a group of friends that she is too. We go out a fair amount as a group, she's a lovely girl and has just moved into her first home. I couldn't afford £100 and if she put £100 in my wedding cases I'd feel pretty guilty. I think £50 max.

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CloserToFiftyThanTwenty · 04/06/2015 14:47

If you can afford £40 why not?

Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:47

Yes, I agree. £20 is more of a birthday present. £40 is more appropriate I think, but dp disagrees as we are "only evening guests"

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Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:47

closer because dp is a tight arse ha

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RinkRashDerbyKisses · 04/06/2015 14:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jen1610 · 04/06/2015 14:48

For an evening invite I'd put 30 I think.

Day I put 50-100

Jen1610 · 04/06/2015 14:49

Rinkrash was that an all day wedding you attended?

ItsTricky · 04/06/2015 14:50

Too late now but we tend to give John Lewis vouchers. I imagine cash to just get put in wallets and frittered away on bread and milk etc. With a voucher they would buy something to keep/use (or just fritter in Waitrose!)

Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 14:54

Itstricky- I woulve done JL vouchers but they've asked for money. I think it's for their honeymoon spendings and doing up their new home. Hope it doesn't go on bread and milk but if that's what they need to spend it on then I guess that's that.

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Fudgeface123 · 04/06/2015 14:58

What does it matter if it was an all day wedding Jen1610, if you can't afford more then you can't afford more.

londonrach · 04/06/2015 15:06

I dont live in mn world. Last evening wedding i went to wine glasses (£2 for 6 from supermarket, i wrapped each in tissue paper), pretty wedding bag and nice bottle of wine. It looked beautiful. Id have been pleased if someone had given me that at my wedding. Its the thought that counts and the fact the guest comes. Whole cost was less than £10. Bride sent very nice thank you card after event and is using the glasses as ive seen them. Ive never given £40 at a wedding even my sisters but then ive not had much money to spare.

HopOnTheMonnerBus · 04/06/2015 15:11

£40 for an evening do of a friend of a friend is a bit much, I agree with your DH.

£20 is very generous.

smellsofelderberries · 04/06/2015 15:16

£40, as long as you can afford it. Are you travelling for the wedding? We usually budget about £60 for a gift/cash, but none of our friends get married in our city so we always have to travel and usually drop £400+ on attending.

Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 04/06/2015 15:17

No, it's a 10 minute drive away so no travelling for us. I think I'll go for £40 seems to be the majority

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