To take medicine DH doesn't want me to?

[AllergictoSummer]

Quickly a I have to go out in 5 mins.

Have hay fever, constant dripping nose, wanting to scratch out eyes, itchy throat. Mentioned to d.h that as no longer pg/be can get hay fever medicine again. He said he didn't want me to as it makes me sleepy (not sure it is true, although it does have an effect on sex). I have four tablets left (out of date, from last year). I called yesterday to ask if I can just pick up a prescription and there is one waiting for me.

DH believes it is all a fuss over nothing. Hay fever is an outlook on life, if I just exposed myself more to the pollen etc then my body would get used it it.

Also have to pay for medicines where I am.

Aibu to pick up the prescription and get myself some drugs?

Children under 5 aren't supposed to have any nuts because of choking and because pieces can get lodged if they can't get them down.

Sorry, any WHOLE nuts.

Allergic - you seem to be completely oblivious to how dangerous this is. I am enraged on your DD's behalf. Its one thing him being a twat but you are just backing him up.

I have never heard that one before MrsTerry. Surely that applies to most foods?

redshoe I'm not happy with it, and he knows that. But he is not going against the medical advice that we have received.

Whole nuts are particularly bad, along with hot dogs, popcorn and the like.

blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/5-common-choking-hazards-in-children/

Seems you're married to a selfish pillock who is dangerous.

Would rather have sex with you suffering than you feel well and as for what he did to his child...

But if what you said earlier is right - he said - in some countries the advice is: he did not say do this, or don't do this. Imagine the worst happens. You and your DH are in court, what do you think the Dr will say then ? He will say you misinterpreted him. It is actually your duty to protect your child. Please see another doctor.

I don't believe you have had that medical advice from a paediatrician, or that you have seriously misinterpreted it (trying to look on the good side here).....

No way is it a good idea to force feed nuts to a child with a nut allergy.

Well, I did. What are you supposed to do then? Record every doctor's appointment in case they might at some point try to deny what they told you? (Not force feeding, she willingly eats them. I don't so it's not an issue when it is just me. The doctor said this is probably because I have a mild intolerance to them so always avoid when possible).

I will go back to the doctor in a few weeks when they have their next shots so will ask again then.

Paediatrician is not an allergy specialist.
Your ds however IS a controlling, ill informed, opinionated Knob of the first degree. If he's so keen to have sex with you whilst you are suffering with hay fever sneeze repeatedly in his face.

If he doesn't want to take drugs that's up to him (and more fool him I say, I'm quite a fan of modern medicine!) but what you take (as long as it's legal) is your business!

Oh and he could have seriously harmed your daughter - that alone would have me questioning my relationship

What the fuck?? Why are you so passive about him doing this to your DD?

I have never heard that one before MrsTerry. Surely that applies to most foods?

Have you really not heard of choking hazards for children? The WHO recommends that children under 5 should not have whole nuts.

www.healthystart.nhs.uk/food-and-health-tips/introducing-solid-foods/isf-2/

Tomatoes and grapes for example are the perfect size to get lodged in an infant's airway (because their airways are so small). So should always be cut in half. Either way I think your DH is irresponsible and hasn't considered the seriousness of what he was doing or any consequences.

Of course I have, always insist on cutting grapes (drives DH crazy but he gave in), sausages, cherry tomatoes but never heard anything about nuts being a choking hazard. Will not let them have chewy sweets/marshmallows.

Genuine question...they're so much smaller than tomatoes how come both are a choking hazard. If a cherry tomato or grape is the right size to block the airway then how can a nut also be the right size to block it?

I know there are no hazelnuts in the house at the moment because I'm the one who does the food shopping

Look into local honey and take that a spoon a day, it may help to desensitise you to local pollen, there are supplements you can get to take all year round to boost your tolerance of irritation pollen

Sadly there is nothing to boost tolerance of a complete idiot like that arse you are currently saddled with.

Take the meds you need, the lack of sex would be more down to the fact that he's a prick than antihistamines.

The advice you have been given regarding DD's nut allergy is incorrect and potentially extremely dangerous. You need to see a specialist paediatric allergist, not just a paediatrician (whether they are or are not head of a hospital/ward.) It is simply incorrect that there is no point doing allergy tests on a child under 3 years old. Whilst frequent and early exposure to nuts in an infant who has not exhibited any signs of allergic reaction does indeed appear to confer protection against onset of allergy, feeding the allergen to a child who has already demonstrated an allergic reaction is a completely different matter. Children do grow out of allergies and controlled exposure to the allergen under medical guidance and often in a hospital setting can be the way forward. You don't say whether you had been issued with antihistamines, steroids or an epipen for DD. If not, and if you had not been instructed in their use, exposing her to the allergen was extremely dangerous and could have had catastrophic results. The second, or third, or fourth exposure to an allergen can be hugely more serious and dramatic than the first, and she could have gone into full blown anaphylactic shock.

I know you have been acting in good faith, and I'm certainly not trying to 'tell you off', but as someone who has a life threatening nut allergy and who has a DD who is allergic to CMP, bananas and mustard seed, I really couldn't let this pass without comment. For other posters who may read this thread, as much as anythign else.

But getting back to your orginal question - take the medication! It sounds dreadful and the effects on your body, well being, concentration, etc of the hay fever (which is so not 'an outlook on life' - what the hell does that mean anyway?!?!?) may far more debilitating than the antihistamines. Have you tried different types? So sorry you are suffering with it.

You have never heard of nuts being a choking hazard ?

I had my kids centuries ago when it was still de rigeur to swig Guinness every night for the iron and smoke to keep babies weight down, but even then there were warnings about nuts and small children.

I think you are being rather coy, OP.

No, honestly I haven't. My mother once mentioned grapes when my niece was small and one of DH's friends told me about sausages. Cherry tomatoes I figured as they are the same size as grapes. Never heard anything about nuts. But then my DC were the first babies I ever held, I'd only met a baby a few times (DH's goddaughter and sister) before they arrived. I never asked HV type person or googled if it was ok to give nuts as it never occurred to me to feed them nuts because I don't eat them so never buy them.

I'm considered quite paranoid by DC's friends parents for still cutting grapes but in all the conversations no one has ever said anything about nuts being a hazard.

If no one has picked up on this, yet, nuts swell up in the airways, as they absorb moisture. Being smaller than grapes, they lodge further down the airways before this happens, so even harder to get out again.

My DD3 has a friend who nearly died from anaphylactic shock at two years of age after a (smooth) peanut butter sandwich. She had eaten them before with no reaction, but it just suddenly happened.

Hospital allergy testing has revealed that it has got worse.

It is very fortunate that your husband did not kill your daughter. I am not exaggerating.

Wow, ouryve that's really useful/terrifying info, thanks. Am inspired to be much more careful although I never give my 2 year old nuts, obviously..

Ask him casually “Can I see your Medical Degree certificate?” If he can’t produce one tell him to wind his neck in and get the damn medicine.

So your DH fed your allergic daughter nuts and then went out to leave you with a possible allergic reaction? He's "driven crazy" by you cutting up grapes and instead of encouraging you to go to the doctors to try out other anti histimines he doesnt want you to take them because then you dont feel like sex? Why on earth are you with him?

So, let's be clear - your "D"H would rather risk his DD's life than take basic precautions for her safety, such as cutting up choking hazards and not feeding her things she may be allergic to, is that right? IS he some sort of religious fanatic who thinks that nature should be allowed to take its course, come hell or high water?

And yes, WHY are you facilitating his fanaticism?

You don't need a prick test, you're married to one.