To wonder if this is fair?

[cleoteacher]

I was chatting to a friend who works for the MOD and has a 2.5 yo like me. We were talking about the high cost of childcare and she let slip how much she pays for childcare.

I was really shocked to find she pays a small amount more than me for the MOD nursery. Her dd goes there full time 8-6 and gets three meals a day whereas my ds goes 2 days a week to a childminder and gets two meals aday and she only pAys about £200 more than me.

I couldn't help myself to say what a bargain she was getting and left it at that.

But it did get me thinking whether this is fair? I am assuming the nursery is heavily funded by the government and so the tax payer. I know she is a tax payer too but can't help questioning the fairness of it.

£200 a month more than me that is.

Other employers could choose to provide subsidised nurseries if they wanted to, this what the MoD are doing I suppose.

Your friends entire wage is paid by the "tax payer" too - do you begrudge her that? Try thinking of the nursery subsidy as part of her wage/work benefits. And think about getting a job where she works!

Why don't you ask your employer to pull their finger out and look after their employees?

Why shouldn't employers want to retain parents, and their experience, by helping short term with childcare costs?

How does your friend being poorer help anyone?

YABU and short sighted.

YABU, this is a benefit offered by her employer

I used to work in a nursery on an RAF camp. We received no extra money from the government in comparison to other nurseries.

YABU

the housing is shocking, the time apart is hard, Jesus can't we have something nice?!

childcare helps everyone, it's takes a financial strain off the families. Welfare in some regiments is really important and they help as much as they can.

Her child could be eligible for the 2yo funding. Her employer could do what many do and subsidise childcare.a family member could be paying for sessions to help out.

You don't know. Either way it's nothing to do with you.

and stop being so childish with your fair nonsence

The wages ain't great either, Ginger! But let's shit on the men and women who spend months and months apart from their families, just so we can keep it "fair"!

I am assuming the nursery is heavily funded by the government and so the tax payer.

Probably, as are almost all nurseries that accept NEF funding. As an employer who presumably expects quite a lot from their employees, providing subsidised childcare is probably a cost-effective way of ensuring that their staff are able to perform their duties. If her child is in childcare from 8-6, then I'm guessing she is putting in a lot of hours at work which her employers appear to value.

indeed fairy I'm sat up whilst DS sleeps because OH is on 3hour standby and theirs movement so I'm worried, but hey ho how dare we have cheaper childcare....

It's not like we live round the corner from family either, so the grandparents can't help with the child care. There is no other option but to pay for it.

All sorts of businesses and organisations have various schemes and benefits for their employees. Some have childcare, generous paid maternity leave, time off for sports, etc. I even worked for a company years ago that had a fully stocked bar that employees could use after work and they would pay for your taxi home so no drink driving. I now teach and my school allows children of staff to attend the school without paying school fees. It's different everywhere.

Agree with midnight. I get 5 months full pay for maternityand a really good pension. Dh gets free gym membership and free food. They are things that the company can provide cheaply in comparison to how much their employees value them.

I think it makes more economic sense for an employer to retain highly skilled personnel by offering subsidised childcare than to see all the thousands spent on training wasted because of lack of childcare provision once service personnel become parents.

Or are you saying that they shouldn't get to have children because the taxpayer pays their salary. Your view is a bit shortsighted either way

YABU. It's in effect part of their remuneration. Do you think everyone should be paid exactly the same regardless of the job they do? And it will make them more efficient employees if they aren't having to worry about child care.

YABU. Unless we're going to live in a communist state, different jobs come with different salaries and different benefits. It sounds sensible for childcare to be subsidised for mod employees.

They aren t in the military department they work in the offices. She lives with her dh half hour down the rd from her work. So no having to deal with time apart etc. they both earn £30k + and have a lovely house so not the case that they need other perks.

They do work long hours yes but so do other people. I don't think her dd gets any extra fun finding because she's 2 as no SN.

I was a teacher so was also paid with government money so certainly don't begrudge that.

Just unsure and shocked their childcare is so cheap and wondering why they are helped so much over other places when they could certainly afford the childcare otherwise.

She's mentioned before there nursery had reduced fees but I am just surprised by how reduced. I don't begrudge her perks but that's an extremely nice one.

Just unsure it's fair how heavily funded it is when she earns a good amount anyway and doesn't need that much help. I get they want to look after their employees and keep them as do other companies but I imagine other companies don't fund childcare quite to that extent.

I worked in the public sector and had no such help.

I really don't think the answer to inequality in childcare is to lower the bar so that no employer offers anything better than the worst!

Civil service jobs do have good benefits. They generally don't pay as high a salary as their employees could get for doing equivalent jobs in the private sector, but people value the security and the benefits.

I also think you need to find out what the funding arrangements actually are before you go off on an 'its not fair' wail! How about you get qualified and get a civil service job!

I don't see how they need to retain staff by funding childcare so much. They have good wages and lots of incentives for promotion so other incentives to keep them there.

Maybe she's telling you that to piss you off?
Really,nursery fees can be pretty different. Is it purely for their staff? I'd say that's a pretty great incentive to retain great skill sets. Unusual but great.

It might just be subsidised as she dues paiy more than you.

You get a job with them then op!

Damn fat fingers *not be subsidised

It isn't fair. Life isn't fair. It doesn't have to be fair! Honestly you sound like a petulant child about this.

I'll repeat my suggestion that you should look out for jobs where she works if you think her pay and other work benefits are that good. It's not about getting more "help" - she has chosen a job that comes with these benefits. You can do the same.