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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To support DS to break school rules?

399 replies

Woffa · 20/05/2015 22:52

My DS's secondary school has issued a written ban on sixth formers driving to school and parking in the local roads nearby (even though there are no double yellow lines etc) to avoid upsetting the residents.
The bus fare for DS is expensive and the saving helps pay for his insurance.

AIBU to support him in ignoring the ban?

OP posts:
VikingVolva · 21/05/2015 07:21

Unless he is doing extensive and otherwise expensive travel at evenings/weekends, it's very unlikely to add up. Even if his insurance is an offshoot of his parents, teen driving is extremely expensive (though a necessary evil when there is no public transport; though that doesn't apply here).

contractor6 · 21/05/2015 07:30

School cant dictate this, and the residents cant stop anyone parking in their road, yes it is a pain when you can't park your own carbon front of house, but everyone who pays road tax has that option to park on any road subject to restrictions. Resident can however go to the council to request a parking survey and permits be bought in.

ChaiseLounger · 21/05/2015 07:33

I agree that this is not a school rule, because school has no jurisdiction.

budgiegirl · 21/05/2015 07:35

School cant dictate this, and the residents cant stop anyone parking in their road

I agree that the residents can't stop anyone parking, except by discussing it with the council to change the parking rules in their street.

But the school absolutely can dictate this, and apply sanctions to students who don't follow the rules. I'm not saying I agree with it, I'm just saying they can have this rule if they choose.

grannytomine · 21/05/2015 07:48

I think you should be considerate. A few streets away from where I live they had such trouble with this that parking restrictions were introduced. PCSOs regularly blitz the area. If the residents are in fighting mood about this, and they probably are as the school hasn't done this for no reason, then it might be taken further.

At the school my children attended there were parking issues and it was part of the home school agreement that students couldn't park with a mile of the school and parents couldn't drop off within a certain area (can't remember the exact distance now but I think it was half a mile.) At our local school I see parents queuing up to park in the nearest space to the school gate as there kids, who hop out of the car and run off to meet friends, apparently can't walk 5 yards from a parking space.

lostincumbria · 21/05/2015 07:55

The law on behaviour and discipline covers travelling to and from school. Now, arguing parking legally but annoying residents is poor behaviour is to me a real stretch, but I'd be wary of just ignoring the letter. Complain and campaign!

PtolemysNeedle · 21/05/2015 08:03

I agree with you. I think if you're going to continue to encourage your ds to use his car to get to school then you should talk to the school and be honest with them, they probably know they can't do anything to stop it but they have to at least try and keep local residents happy.

lljkk · 21/05/2015 08:08

How far away is the 6th form & how many days/week does he go in?

Justusemyname · 21/05/2015 08:13

My son's secondary school has recently out barriers so no parent can drive on to school grounds at the same time as telling us not to park in the local residential streets, who in turn have signs banning parking between a set time. I was unaware i and my son had secret transportation and invisibility powers.

Jessicalovessunshine · 21/05/2015 08:16

YANBU. As long as he isn't parking illegally, or on school premises, he can get to school however he chooses and park wherever he chooses

agree with whoever said this.

capsium · 21/05/2015 08:25

Is there room for negotiation? If for example you had a relative / friend in the area that let him park on their drive you could inform the school of this arrangement to prove no parking conflicts.

budgiegirl · 21/05/2015 08:32

As long as he isn't parking illegally, or on school premises, he can get to school however he chooses and park wherever he chooses

Except he'd be breaking the school rules. This rule would annoy me, but I'm not sure that teaching my children to ignore the rules that are inconvenient is the right thing to do.

The school has a duty to be an inter grated part of the community, not to set itself apart, and I would imagine they've put this ban in place after complaints from residents. So I can see why they might be doing this.

madreloco · 21/05/2015 08:49

If you think the school can enforce this, youre a fool.

LazyLouLou · 21/05/2015 09:00

Setting aside the dubious logic re costs.

If the school wants to they can add the no car rule to their behaviour rules in the contract your son signs up to 3 times a year - the Learning Agreement.

Then, if his car is reported by locals the school can use the usual disciplinary code to suspend/expel him. If you think the school has not thought this through then your are, indeed, foolish.

Oxbridge has long had a similar rule, after all!

madreloco · 21/05/2015 09:07

he doesnt have sign any agreement with a rule as stupid as that one.

as for costs, its not a direct comparison of car cost vs bus cost...he already has a taxed insured running car, so its car costs vs car plus bus costs. Pretty obvious which will be cheaper, if you think for even a second.

brittabot · 21/05/2015 09:09

YABU. There is a school on my road (which DS attends), and a station 5 minutes from my house so we get the inconsiderate droppers off and also staff and station users parking all day. Terrace houses and there are some 3 car families. It's annoying (we didn't have a car when we moved in so didn't consider it, more fool us). Ours is a primary so can't imagine how much worse it would be if pupils wanted to park all day too.

You are thinking only of what is convenient for your DS, the school obviously have a reason to impose this rule (ie complaints from neighbours) and also I can't see that insurance plus petrol would be any saving on bus fare?

IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou · 21/05/2015 09:13

It'd be more of a waste of money having a car taxed & insured and not using it, than using it for this.

The bus prices round here are way more than the equivalent fuel + wear & tear costs of driving.

As a 6th former he won't be in uniform presumably? And, as said above, if he parks suitable far from school & is observed walking in every day it's not going to be much different to him getting a lift in with someone.

Ignore it - and yes it's fine to teach people to question rules and not just take them at face value......

AwakeCantSleep · 21/05/2015 09:15

I agree it's a stupid rule, and I'd be tempted to ignore it. The residents are not unreasonably annoyed, but the solution to the problem is a residents only parking scheme, complemented by single yellow lines. And not penalising students who would have to pay £500+ extra a year for a bus pass.

On a side note, could your son cycle to school? I did that for many years at school. Very cheap too Smile

FarFromAnyRoad · 21/05/2015 09:15

saras Grin That'll do nicely!

OP do you actually know how many pupils are driving to school and causing the issue? I can't see how it can be that many - so is the issue perhaps other people parking there? Is there a station nearby? Offices with no parking?

LazyLouLou · 21/05/2015 09:20

madreloco, you are right. he does not have to sign. And if he chooses not to he does not get taught. The procedure is fairly simple and many colleges have odd rules and regs in order to be able to promote community integration.

Those spluttering about the unfairness of this really do need to attempt to see the bigger picture. Such selfishness is quite unattractive.

madreloco · 21/05/2015 09:20

I dont know why so many people think they are entitled to control the parking of others...if youve chosen to live somewhere without designated parking then tough shit if you cant park. Nobody owes you a space, if they want to legally park there it isnt up to you, or a school or anyone else to tell them they cant.

LazyLouLou · 21/05/2015 09:22

Oh, and the costing oddity includes the daftness of a 17/18 year old in full time education, on a bus route, having a car in the first place.

Waiting for a year to get the car means reduced costs all round.

TheFairyCaravan · 21/05/2015 09:24

YANBU

DS2(18) drives to school. His college has a car park which the students and teachers can both use, no one gets priority (only the head who has his own space). One of the reasons he drives is because we live in the arse end of nowhere, the bus pass is £500 a year and half the week by the time college finishes and he's walked into town he'll have missed the last bus home. If he had to park in the streets surrounding the college he'd park considerately, he's a very good parker so wouldn't cause a problem.

When I was a kid we lived near the railway station, we always had people parking near our house for 10 hours a day. My parents knew that when they bought it.

madreloco · 21/05/2015 09:26

actually no, they cant refuse to teach him for not agreeing to a rule such as this. And they certainly cannot exclude him from school for legally drving and parking.

TheFairyCaravan · 21/05/2015 09:27

Oh, and the costing oddity includes the daftness of a 17/18 year old in full time education, on a bus route, having a car in the first place.

Do you know the OP's personal circumstances Lazy? Our sons have cars for many reasons, there is absolutely no "daftness" about it all!