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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to hope this sad story gives charities that emply cold callers pause for thought.

131 replies

MythicalKings · 14/05/2015 17:56

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015/may/14/bristol-pensioner-body-avon-gorge-olive-cooke

Over 200 begging letters in a month from charities and frequent cold callers asking for money.

It's horrific. I know how persuasive they can be, there ought to be a way to opt out of receiving charity calls and letters.

OP posts:
KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 14/05/2015 18:51

These charities are bullies. I've been saying this for years...

Dr0pThePirate · 14/05/2015 19:10

God this is awful. I'd heard she was found in the gorge but had no idea of what had actually happened.

Charities are void of the morals and ethics the people who donate to them have. They're just businesses that sell your personal information and "profile" givers to target them more efficiently for their own financial gain.

It's heartbreaking to think this lady felt she was failing to help the needy when in reality she was being exploited as a cash cow to these businesses who couldn't care less about the grief they have caused Sad

AuntyMag10 · 14/05/2015 19:15

Oh no this poor ladySad these cold callers should be ashamed of themselves harassing people constantly.

BikeRunSki · 14/05/2015 19:20

When my mother's partner's father went into care a few years ago, dm's partner got Power of Attorney and found 16 monthly direct debits to charities going out of his ban account. I don't know how much for, but he was giving away over £100 a month. Only one or 2 of them were charities that this old man had any previous connection or personal reason to support. When asked, he thought he only had one. Thing is, he was reasonably well off and could afford it without going cold or hungry, but it shows how easily some who is alone and vulnerable can be persuaded to part with their money.

londonrach · 14/05/2015 19:22

They wont. I bet they be begging letters from her will. I see it on a daily basis my patent being phoned by the charties. My friend hates dogs trust. Her sister is sn and every time she goes out she sees the pictures of the dogs and signs another dd which means her disability money is going to the charity rather than feeding her. My frend has to phone and sort it every week! My friend works and as her sister us an adult she cant control her. When she explains her sister says cancel but then next day another phone call she resigns.... She says theres no let up as new dd are being set up quicker than she can cancel, meanwhile her sister has no money for food.

Original poster
MythicalKings · 14/05/2015 19:23

I'm so disgusted. My friends DF has just had to go into a home and they have discovered nearly all his savings are gone, sent to charities in response to appeals. He also had a dozen direct debits.

It's appalling.

OP posts:
londonrach · 14/05/2015 19:23

Olive rip. Xxx

RiskManagement · 14/05/2015 19:28

Alistair McLean, chief executive of the Fundraising Standards Board (FRSB), said:

“This is a tragedy and we extend our deepest condolences to Olive’s family and loved ones. The last thing that charities will want to do is to cause distress to the public. If you don’t want to be contacted in a certain way, our advice is to get in touch with the relevant charities and tell them.”

This actually made me LOL because it makes no difference, at all.

Fleecyleesy · 14/05/2015 19:34

Absolutely terrible. RIP poor lady.

There has to be a better way to fundraise.

PterodactylTeaParty · 14/05/2015 19:35

They are really persistent Sad

I had to cancel a direct debit not long ago to a charity I do like and support, but I'd lost my job and just didn't have the money. They phoned up to find out why and just would not stop asking for me to renew it. "Look, I got made redundant, I am literally only just managing to buy food right now, I have nothing to spare." "Right, but even £10 a month could help us so much..."

littlejohnnydory · 14/05/2015 19:37

I used to work for a reasonably well known charity. They were money grabbing, capitalist, mercenary and heartless, with the highest turnover of staff I've ever seen to prove it.

NRomanoff · 14/05/2015 19:39

The news earlier said at one point she had 27 direct debits set up. When she cancelled a lot of them, it got even worse.

I am so horrified and saddened by this. She felt so bad she couldn't help everyone, even though so did so much more than most.

Summerisle1 · 14/05/2015 19:40

This is dreadful and really, these charities must take more responsibility. It isn't good enough to airily say "get in touch and tell them" because they don't fucking stop!

A friend of mine (whose dm died very recently) has spent the last 10 years waging an endless and mainly unsuccessful battle against several very well known charities who repeatedly accepted direct debits from her mother. This only came to light originally when she received a panicky call from her mother who said that her electricity was about to be cut off because the bank had bounced a cheque. On going through her dm's current account statements she realised that thousands had gone out in direct debits.

No matter how many times my friend phoned these charities they still kept calling and still kept setting up new direct debits with this increasingly confused elderly lady.

FishWithABicycle · 14/05/2015 19:40

londonrach there are some types of bank account which can't do direct debits or require a physical signature. Could your friend get her sister to switch to an account that makes it more difficult for this to happen.

londonrach · 14/05/2015 19:40

Ive just donated some money to my chosen charity (have receipts but very pleased how much i raised). due to selling some items but i will never and mean never sign a dd. ive seen too many of my patients get chased. also the gift aid be careful as if you dont pay enough tax the tax man will chase you for short fall. One of my parents friends who was retired got chased for £20. Worried the gov that interested....

BellMcEnd · 14/05/2015 19:41

I read this on FB today. It's tragic and heartbreaking. I agree about the persistence of some charities - I donated some money to Syria last year via one of those "text 1234 to donate £5" type things. What. A. Mistake. I was bombarded with phone calls AND texts for several weeks urging me to donate more. I am neither elderly nor vulnerable and I found it hard to deal with and massively irritating. RIP Olive and sympathy to your family Flowers

londonrach · 14/05/2015 19:43

Fish which ones as ill pm her on fb now. Shes really worried. Her sister can live independant so has control of her money for food (rent and bills paid separate). My friend spends her saturdays sorting the dds out.

TheBoov · 14/05/2015 19:43

Hate chuggers with a vengeance - RSPCA called at door earlier and my DH said they had been round earlier in the day. So two 'bugger offs' isn't enough!
I always say (learned from here) 'I don't sign up to direct debits at the door, thank you' before they even start their spiel. So I'm not wasting their time. If they then start to say 'do you care about dying animals/birds/children' and just close the door.

KissMyFatArse · 14/05/2015 19:53

Chuggers round the doors are unbelievably condescending and rude.

I have 2 no cold callers etc signs on my front door and some jumped up wee Muppet looked at me in disgust when I pointed to them when he came to my door and exclaimed 'you don't mean to charities?!'.

Actually yes, especially to charities.

NRomanoff · 14/05/2015 20:00

Chuggers round the doors are unbelievably condescending and rude.

Yep, Chuggers from Tommys came round to ours a few days after I got home after having ds. The women was thrilled I had a newborn in my arms and told me I was incredibly lucky to have my son and I should think about all the women that don't get to bring their babies home. Which I was, because my son nearly died when I gave birth, I explained that and tried to explain that we already donated regularly. She didn't want to hear it she just kept saying 'yes but your baby lived....can you imagine if he was so ill he had very little chance of survival'

While technically she was right, I felt it was entirely inappropriate to keep going at someone a week after a almost losing their child, she finally left when mum came up the drive and saw me in tears and told her exactly what she thought.

GERTI · 14/05/2015 20:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PeachyPants · 14/05/2015 20:06

Poor lady. It's disgusting the tactics some charities use, no less than emotional blackmail and they are persistent to the point of harassment. I've stopped giving to a few major charities because of the fundraising strategies and morally bankrupt chuggers they employ.

peppaontheceiling · 14/05/2015 20:08

They s

cozietoesie · 14/05/2015 20:08

For over 20 years, I've had a DD with one international charity who have a clear policy that they don't hound their contributors. In all of those 20 years, I think I've had one written contact - asking me for confirmation about Gift Aid for some specific reason which I now forget - and when I recently decided to up my monthly contribution it resulted in one single letter confirming that fact and nothing else.

Some charities do play by their rules.

worksallhours · 14/05/2015 20:09

There really ought to be some sort of regulation about this kind of thing.

Dh's friend signed up for a £3 DD to a well known charity back in 2000 when he was a student. They called him on a regular basis asking him to increase the dd. By the time we all found out about it, he'd paid them somewhere in the region of £5000. He was still a trainee on a small income at that point.

He's the type of chap who would feel very difficult at challenging someone on the phone, or saying no when confronted with a highly emotive sales pitch, so I can imagine how difficult it would be for elderly people to say no...particular if they are worried it might be "rude".